Short Stack #18

Him: “Why do you do this? I mean, why do you want to take away people’s faith? Even if they believe things that aren’t true, what is that to you?”Me: “If you’re walking along a roadway and you see a nail out on the pavement, do you leave it there where it could puncture somebody’s tire, or do you pick it up?”Him: “What? I pick it up.”Me: “Yeah, well so do I.” … [Read more...]

#DeathTweets (repost)

Maple Syrup on Pancakes

#DeathTweets: Just chugged about a quart of Diet Coke. Now for the Mentos!____________________#DeathTweets: me and my posse up at the old sanders mansion spoze to be a vampire lives here. yes or no, im bringin back PROOF!____________________#DeathTweets: whoo boys nite out no idea howw mny driks ive had time to go tho wherz my keys____________________#DeathTweets: Makin my own fireworks for the 4th this year! Sulfur, saltpeter, charcoal, yeah! Ima grind this shit down to … [Read more...]

Short Stack #16

[ Could be some repeats in here. Hey, I’m old.] I think it would be funny to witness a nuclear explosion and then shout "That's what SHE said!" Because hey, if ever people needed a laugh, it would be after witnessing a nuclear explosion. … [Read more...]

Short Stack # 14

If your twin brother gets your wife pregnant ... is it still your kid?------------------------------I'm always one of the late adopters. Apparently eating people's faces is all the rage in this week's news, but I think I'm going to wait a few weeks. I'm trying to lose weight.------------------------------Just saw Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets again and I'm wondering ... what would happen if you stabbed a Bible with a basilisk fang? … [Read more...]

Short Stack #11

In Life's Darkest Hours, remind yourself of this: There's chocolate.------------------------Few people know that most of the early programmers at Microsoft were total emos. For instance, the first version of Clippy included the phrase, "Hi, it looks like you're writing a suicide note! Would you like some help?" … [Read more...]

Short Stack #4

“Faith” is the belief in something for which there is no evidence. Breach the protective barrier in your mind, the barrier that keeps you from believing stuff just because somebody tells you to, or just because you want to, and all sorts of ugly side effects begin to take place. The first is that you become a sucker for the next 50 con men able to convince you of THEIR seductive lie.When there’s evidence, nobody talks about faith. Faith only comes into it when we want to replace evidence with b … [Read more...]


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