“To be wronged is nothing, unless you continue to remember it.”
“I don’t love you anymore.”
“I am so disappointed in you.”
“You are ugly!”
“You aren’t at all talented.”
Those unkind words, and sometimes truthful words, can certainly hurt, but what hurts even more is hanging on to the words and that hurtful moment, as if they are ghosts of the past continually haunting you. By replaying it over and over, it becomes poison to your confidence, your self esteem and your soul and causes that grudge and a whole other array of emotion to play with your mind and your heart. It stops people from loving again, trying new things, and growing. Like a butterfly stuck in a mason jar, unable to experience the world, the more that you hold on to the grudge, the more you disassemble your life and your true purpose.
“Let today be the day you stop being haunted by the ghost of yesterday. Holding a grudge & harboring anger/resentment is poison to the soul. Get even with people…but not those who have hurt us, forget them, instead get even with those who have helped us.”
― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free
As we enter November, the month of gratitude, take the time to write out your list of resentments. It could be that your biggest resentment is you, yourself. In order to make room for love, you need to remove the hate. Maybe you need to email or call the person you are upset with, just remember to not remove hate with more hate. If you don’t like confrontation, or they have crossed over, simply take out a notepad and start writing. You can burn the letter, releasing the bitterness and sadness. As you watch the smoke rise, think about all the hurt and anger being carried away within the smoke. With each breath you take, you release your hurt and disappointment. It isn’t necessarily forgiving or accepting, it is removing the coal from your hand and your heart. Instead of feeling as if you are in pieces, feel the peace that comes from letting go.
“Forgiveness is a sign of positive self-esteem. We no longer identify ourselves by our past injuries and injustices. We are no longer victims.”