Dream: Connections

Last night I had a dream I was on drugs.  I’ve never so much as smoked a joint, and my alcohol consumption has been minimal, since I was raised Mormon.  But I liked being on drugs in my dream.  I dreamed that I was outside looking at the night sky and there were more stars [Read More...]

Exoteric and esoteric ritual

I have never liked discussions about “esoteric” meaning or practice.  “Esoteric” for me is associated with Neoplatonism, Gnosticism, Hermeticism, Kaballah, ceremonial magic (or “magick”), astrology, alchemy, tarot,  spiritualism, and Theosophy, and the philosophies of Jacob Bohme, Franz Mesmer, Emanuel Swedenborg, Helena Blavatsky, Rudolph Steiner, Aleister Crowley, and the “occult” generally: none of which (with the [Read More...]

Descensus Averni Day 7: Fizzle

Well, my 7 day ritual ended with a fizzle.  The practical demands of modern living came crashing into my religious intentions.  Yesterday, our fridge went out and I had to cook about 6 meals to save the food.  I decided that Fate wanted me to feast and not fast.  Moving food into ice, buying a [Read More...]

Descensus Averni Day 6: Sacrifice

Today is Day 6 of my Descensus Averni ritual. I have to admit, I passed out last night without doing the ritual. I think fasting and then gorging myself afterwards took its toll on me. I have debated whether to break my fast before or after the ritual.  I’m not sure which would be more [Read More...]

Descensus Averni Day 5: Prayer

Last night I poured out my heart in prayer to the Goddess.  I’ve been Pagan for seven years, and I have never really prayed like that.  I have offered rote prayers, poetic prayers, but I have never just talked to Her.  I told her that I was uncertain about the purpose of what I was [Read More...]

ADF Lughnasadh Ritual

I mentioned earlier that I attended my first ADF ritual about a week ago. After the disappointment of the Wiccan ritual with Janet Stewart and Gavin Bone, the ADF ritual was a relief. As I understand, the ADF ritual was kind of a mess compared to their usual rites. A storm forced them to move [Read More...]


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