I am posting my 50th blog. I never imagined that I would be a blogger, let alone one who tried to “gather the pieces of my life under the eye of the Holy.” But here I am–writing, creating, and sharing with a larger world, much of which is unknown to me. The endeavor has meant that I have needed to look first inward at my life, and ask myself where the Spirit is moving in me this week. Some weeks this is clearer than in others.
I have also needed to look outward at what is happening in the world. The closeness with which we all keep connected means that even in my most solitary moments, I am not unlinked from all those in the world who are also gathering pieces of their own lives under the eye of the Holy. What hurts another, hurts me, even when it is far, far way. What delights me is someone else’s joy as well.
I have been challenged to look upward to where Wisdom dwells. Scripture, tradition, poetry, music and art all are intimations of the Spirit, pointing my vision and senses to see with fresh eyes, hear with open hears and receive insight with an open heart. Although this blog has not been an academic exercise, it has given me an opportunity both to deepen my roots and spread my branches.
Maybe the greatest freedom has come in letting myself the rhythms and tempo of the Creative Spirit in me. My granddaughter, nicknamed “Paintalicious” this week at her school, gives me some much needed instruction:
- she teaches me to enter into my blog with abandon; for her, more is better, more ideas, more time, more paint. Total immersion in the enterprise of the moment lets my energy flow.
- she demonstrates to me that the doing of a task of pleasure is as worthy as the finished project. The end product may or may not be what I hope for. Getting there is the important part.
- she shows me that the “rules” are really only guidelines; much can be be discovered and savored by going outside of them.
- she models for me that laughter needs to accompany my work, even as I am laboring, wrestling, chewing on the end of my pencil (metaphorically speaking!). The laughter is that holy hilarity that come from living out a call of the Spirit.
In the past few weeks I have taken on a temporary part-time job, a call that felt as if it had my name on it. I am happy in it, but I am seeing that the Creative Spirit needs to get my attention in unmistakeable ways as I juggle time, the concerns of the job and ongoing commitments, along with tending my own soul’s longings for nourishment from the Holy.
So I tonight I am awake in the night, as I was when I wrote my very first blog…listening for the prompting of the Spirit, trusting that the pieces of my life make some kind of sense, offering my reflections with open heart and laughter to a readership unseen but beloved. More deeply, giving words to my journey is an expression of my joy and belief in the One who has created me for good works, and then gives me the resources I need to do them.
I am grateful, Creator Spirit!