Why is it that MEN always seem to be the ones who look at porn and cheat?

Man is flirting with another woman over mobile phone to go on da

Why is it always men who look at porn, hide things, and cheat?  I’m a single woman, and I can’t help but notice that in the news last week, the one thing Josh Duggar and most of the Ashley Madison cheaters have in common is that they are all men.   Supposedly, even the few women on the hacked Ashley Madison site were fake profiles, just to reel in all those men out there who want to cheat.  It is crazy.  It makes me think women are just inherently more trustworthy.  Part of me still wants to meet someone, but how can I ever trust any guy again? [Read more...]

The Science of Seduction: Create Chemistry by Getting Physical

Man choosing donut instead of apple

Dear Shaunti, My wife is constantly nagging me about taking care of myself, but I feel like I’m doing a good enough job where that is concerned. I work out sometimes, and try to eat healthy when I can, although I do enjoy some junk food! Lately, I’ve been noticing that she seems to be [Read More...]

Hard Truths are Still True: Taking Care of Yourself Shows You Care for Your Marriage

iStock_000020880921_Large

Dear Shaunti,

I can hardly write this, I’m so upset by one of your columns. You shared that it was important for a woman to “take care of herself” for her husband, and that it was “the effort that mattered” not the results. First of all, this is a dangerous throwback to 1950’s America where the little woman was supposed to greet the conquering hero at the door in a skirt and high heels. The notion that a woman should have to do that makes me sick. But more important, I am deeply skeptical of your contention that the effort is what matters to men. Any man who says he wants his wife to take care of herself, is really saying that he wants the Sports Illustrated supermodel and if she doesn’t meet that standard, it’s time to trade her in for a newer model. I cannot believe that someone with your experience and education would be so susceptible to misogynistic propaganda. How can you possibly defend what these men are saying? [Read more...]

Lust at First Glance? The Difference in Seeing vs. Gawking

horny guy

Dear Shaunti, I read in your book that even happily married men struggle with looking at other women and even have images from the past pop-up in their minds. Does this mean that it’s OK for men to lust after women because they are wired this way? – Perplexed Dear Perplexed, No doubt about it, [Read More...]

Let’s Get Physical: Health Body, Healthy Marriage

Frustrated Overweight Woman Measuring Waist In Bathroom

Dear Shaunti, I am definitely not the size I was when I married my husband. But honestly, 4 kids and 25 years later, I don’t see it ever happening. The problem is that I recently overheard my brother saying something about how happy he was, now that his wife was getting in shape. It irritated [Read More...]


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