Intend to get married

Today’s maxim sounds like a nagging parent. I can’t help but approach this as a feminist first and foremost, and I think, ‘how heteronormative that is!’ But as soon as my knee jerk reaction calms down, I realize, ‘hey, I’m married!’ So what is this maxim really about?

I think the key word here is intention. The important part may or may not be that we actually get married (or partner up, however that has meaning for you). But the idea that we reach a point where we are ready to be a partner with some one else is a sign of maturity. In my mind a person must be secure in themselves, know what they can offer in partnership and know what they need and desire from one, be sexually mature (your mileage may vary on what this means to you), be willing to be flexible but have enough pride in one’s self to not compromise one’s values or to take a partner out of desperation or pressure.

I am married, to a straight male. But I am rather on the fringe of things, and I believe that partnerships can take a surprising number of forms. I fully support people who intend to partner up and have the maturity to find their best fit (note: I did not say anything about perfection). I recognize that there are plenty of people who don’t want to partner up, and realizing that can also be a sign of maturity.

Ideally, whatever spiritual practices we engage in will help us in our maturation.

And….. that’s all I have to say on this maxim!

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About Niki Whiting
  • Niklas Gander

    For us, intention to be married is a spell. A spell to put into the universe the idea that marriage is not only between man and woman. It is powerful magic. Umph.

    • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/awitchsashram myownashram

      Amen.


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