Conversations with Tank

Me: “Linc, why? Why? Why do you do things like eat Expo markers and shove Legos up your nose? Look at this, child! Look at what I just pulled out of your nose!”   Tank: “Linky naughty-pants. I sowwy, Mama. Kiss?”   [Read more...]

Tank vs. the Chore Chart

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An Open Letter to My Mother, Regarding Her Gymnophobia

Dear Mom, I know things have been rough between us lately. I know that you have been been emotionally volatile about the direction I’ve chosen to take my life. I understand that you don’t agree with it and that you would prefer I go in a more “socially acceptable” direction. But this is not a [Read More...]

Poop and Charity

I learned something really important today: a good friend lets you clean up your own messes. Not all the time, maybe. And not in totality. But it’s actually charitable to let someone take care of their own shite. Literally, in this case. Today I went next door to have coffee with my friend and let [Read More...]

Dada Does Breastfeeding

Here’s a true thing: there is nothing better than coming to the end of a long, exhausting road trip, only to have three out of four children melt down entirely in the aftermath. One, luckily, has an easily fixable ear infection. The other, slightly less luckily, has no-big-deal-but-must-heal-on-his-own-even-though-he-looks-gruesome-fifth’s disease. The littlest, though, Linc Baby of [Read More...]


Children vomiting sucks, and I hate it. There’s no getting around the dreaded stomach bug when you’re a mom, but there’s also no use pretending it’s not basically the worst thing ever. That being said, I thought I had reached the apex of upchuck trials when Charlotte, at the age of 18 months, became convinced [Read More...]