Oh Baby!

Some countries think that there is a limit to stupidity run riot when it comes to naming one’s children. In fact, New Zealand has done something about such brain dead decisions. You have to run the name of your new born by a government registry in Kiwi land. If only this had existed in America when I was growing up with a girl named ‘Candy Apple’ and another named ‘Merry Christmas’ (I am not kidding). Such parents should be immediately deported to New Zealand, and their children should be put in the name protection program.

Here is a list of some the names banned in New Zealand since 2001 — and how many times they were proposed by people as their child’s name.

Justice:62

King:31

Princess:28

Prince:27

Royal:25

Duke:10

Major:9

Bishop:9

Majesty:7

J:6

Lucifer:6

using brackets around middle names:4

Knight:4

Lady:3

using back slash between names:8

Judge:3

Royale:2

Messiah:2

T:2

I:2

Queen:2

II:2

Sir:2

III:2

Jr:2

E:2

V:2

Justus:2

Master:2

Constable:1

Queen Victoria:1

Regal:1

Emperor:1

Christ:1

Juztice:1

3rd:1

C J :1

G:1

Roman numerals III:1

General:1

Saint:1

Lord:1

. (full stop):1

89:1

Eminence:1

M:1

VI:1

Mafia No Fear:1

2nd:1

Majesti:1

Rogue:1

4real:1

* (star symbol):1

5th:1

S P:1

C:1

Sargent:1

Honour:1

D:1

Minister:1

MJ:1

Chief:1

Mr:1

V8:1

President:1

MC:1

Anal:1

A.J:1

Baron:1

L B:1

H-Q:1

Queen V:1

I have just one question about this list. How come they didn’t ban naming people after fruit, for example Kiwi :)??? I’m just saying….

  • DavePC

    I have known a few people in the US with a select few of those names (but definitely not Anal).

  • Stephen

    You can’t stop stupidity, you can only hope to contain it.

  • mhelbert

    My wife works at an inner city hospital. She runs across some good choices for the list…Lemonjello and Orangello. One name pronounced Shi-thee-ad, (you figure out the spelling), and many others that make one take pause and wonder what these parents were thinking.

  • Matthew G. Zatkalik

    One bright, angelic confirmand was named Latrina. There oughta be a law. Way to go New Zealand

  • Michael

    And as a reader who comes from New Zealand – Just to put the record straight – the “Kiwi” comes from the flightless bird native to NZ – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kiwi. It is only those from North America that equate Kiwi to fruit :-)

  • BenW3

    Hi Michael: The problem is that a flightless bird is not a bird, it’s dead as a dodo :) BW3


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