Signs of the Times

*SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN VANCOUVER READS:*
We will heel you
We will save your sole
We will even dye for you.

*A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK:*
“Blind man driving.”

*Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office:*
“Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”

*In a Podiatrist’s office:*
“Time wounds all heels.”

*On a Septic Tank Truck*:
Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels

*At an Optometrist’s Office*:
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”

*On a Plumber’s truck*:
“We repair what your husband fixed.”

*On another Plumber’s truck*:
“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”

*At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee *:
“Invite us to your next blowout.”

*On an Electrician’s truck*:
“Let us remove your shorts.”

*In a Non-smoking Area:*
“If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.”

*On a Maternity Room door*:
“Push. Push. Push.”

*At a Car Dealership*:
“The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”

*Outside a Muffler Shop:*
“No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”

*In a Veterinarian’s waiting room*:
“Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”

*At the Electric Company:*
“We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time.
However, if you don’t, YOU will be de-lighted.”

*In a Restaurant window:*
“Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”

*In the front yard of a Funeral Home*:
“Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”

*At a Propane Filling Station:*
“Thank Heaven for little grills.”

*In a Chicago Radiator Shop:*
“Best place in town to take a leak.”

*And the best one for last…;*
Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
“Caution – This Truck is full of Political Promises”


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