Two Lies

It’s so hard to talk about sex and virginity in a real way, and this woman keeps it real.  Really real.  Though she has salty language, the message of this mother of three is worth passing along.

Read her article here.

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  • Vanessa Stockwell

    Totally get what she’s saying, and yes, through Jesus and His sacrifice we can be forgiven for all our sins, but we can’t ignore scripture that clearly states the sexually immoral will not inherit the kingdom of God such as in 1 Corinthians 6:9. And that’s just one verse, there are many as I’m sure you’re aware so sex before marriage is wrong, and it is a very big deal. The writer seems to be confused and doesn’t really know what she’s talking about. I would not tell my kids, oh its not that big a deal. It really is because it opens the door to worse sins and there are serious consequences. Pre marital sex shouldn’t be taken lightly under any circumstance. I’m a mom of five who at one time was an unwed mother.

    1 Corinthians 6:9 — Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals,

    Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality,

    Don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality,

    • TrueBlue

      Interesting, Vanessa, that you were an unwed mother. When you share with your children that premarital sex equals sexual immorality, how do they square what you’re saying with what you did?

      • melory

        As a Christian, what do you share with your children, since you were also an unwed mother?

        • TrueBlue

          I was interested in Vanessa’s perspective, Melory, but since you asked, I tell my children that sex is a gift from God to give your spouse. I tell them that sex is best enjoyed with your spouse and as an act of love, not lust. But I do not equate premarital sex to adultery and prostitution, as Vanessa seems to do with her children (unless I’m reading her comment incorrectly). That’s what I find curious — that Vanessa does (or might) tell her children that premarital sex is akin to adultery and prostitution. How might her child who was born out of wedlock internalize that assessment?

  • Vanessa Stockwell

    To be clear when I wrote fornication can lead to a worse sin, I was referring to abortion. Fornication can easily lead to abortion, so now we’ve gone from the sin of fornication, which may not be that bad, to the sin of murder, which is pretty bad. Right?

    • TrueBlue

      Wrong. A person who engages in premarital sex is not “easily” a murderer.

      • melory

        That is not what she said. You may want to read her post again.

        • TrueBlue

          That is absolutely what can be inferred: “Fornication can easily lead to abortion…”

          • melory

            And you wonder why I say you are making stuff up!

            Read what she said until you GET IT! This is how all these false narratives about Christians start – you liberals make stuff up and then you run with it and repeat it as truth.

          • TrueBlue

            The quote was hers, Melory. If I misunderstood it, I ask Vanessa to clarify for me. It’s called “a conversation.” I’ve offered her my reading of what she’s written, and I’d like to get her take on it. I have no idea why you are so offended. I wasn’t even addressing you. Maybe you should take a page from my book and care less about what happens in cyberspace.

          • melory

            No you twisted her words.
            She has nothing to explain to you. It is clear as daylight to everybody what she said.

            “Maybe you should take a page from my book and care less about what happens in cyberspace.”
            Maybe you should take your own advise, you protest too much!

  • Thotocv

    Vanessa are you aware that the vast majority of people (95%) have premarital sex? And that’s nothing new. Yes, for almost everyone it’s not a big deal.

    • Vanessa Stockwell

      Plan B, the morning after pill, is now available over the counter for women of ALL ages.

      Fornication (sex before marriage) isn’t a big deal? Not even when it leads to abortion?

  • Sue B

    Great article, Bristol. I”m sending a link to my 3 kids (all grown). Thanks for sharing.

  • TrueBlue

    Excellent link, Bristol. I also had a child before marriage. Fortunately, my boyfriend and I went on to get married and have another baby. We’re very happy. Finally, a Christian-oriented article that doesn’t equate my having my child out of wedlock — or your having a child out of wedlock — with sin worthy of Hell fire. Cheers to us!

    • melory

      Lie number 3: Christianity never taught that you are doomed because you had a child out of wedlock. Churches also do not teach that. They teach that we are all sinners that need forgiveness and that if we confess our sins, He forgives us and remove them as far away from us as the east is from the west.

      The Bible also says that there is therefor now no condemnation for those who are in Christ. The moment you confess and He forgives you, He removes the burden. If you continue to carry the burden it is your fault – you have not done your homework about the grace of God and you are therefor ignorant of the fact that He has come to give you life in abundance, He carried your burdens at the cross. You are now FREE!

      I have never read any Christian-oriented article that equate having a child out of wedlock worthy of Hell fire. The ones I have read over many years always point to the Savior and His love for the sinner. But you have a part to do, you have to go to Him and confess and receive His forgiveness.

      • TrueBlue

        Oh, Melory. It’s you again…

        • melory

          Hi, TrueBlue, glad to see you. How are you doing?

      • melory

        Clarification: Lie number 3 is this:
        a) “The other (referring to the church) forced me to carry a spirit crushing load.”
        b) “Finally, a Christian-oriented article that doesn’t equate my having my child out of wedlock — or your having a child out of wedlock — with sin worthy of Hell fire.” This is a false narrative about what Christians believe.

        • TrueBlue

          OK, then, thank you for that clarification. I apologize for my biting remark. I thought you accused me of lying.

      • TrueBlue

        “Lie number 3″? Melory, some not-so-well-meaning Christians call children born out of wedlock “bastards.” They’re Christians like you — always pointing out the flaws of others and spouting Scripture down to the letter without really embracing the spirit of the Word.

        • melory

          TrueBlue you said you are a Christian – from what I have seen about you here at Bristol’s blog- you are guilty of that which you accuse me of. You are always making snide remarks to other Christians here, mocking their believes, they never respond, and when one does – you act all hurt.

          You make up stuff about Christians today that you cannot prove. You are just repeating the liberal talking points about Christians.

          You were here for a long time posting mean responses to posters and smearing Bristol’s mom – finally someone pushed back – now you act the victim.

          You can dish it out, but you can’t take it.

          I am not mad at you, neither have I anything against you. Perhaps we can now both let it go now, it is getting boring.

          All the best to you, and I know you wish me all the best, I am not being sarcastic.

          • TrueBlue

            Melory, I APOLOGIZED TO YOU in my comment above this one, and I stated that I had misunderstood your comment. I don’t know why they were posted out of order. The comment in which I wrote my apology was my last reply to you. But you’re constantly accusing people of making stuff up, as if you know what everyone else’s life experiences are. How do you know that no one called my child a bastard? And how do you know that I wasn’t judged by people who profess to know God?

            I post positive responses to Bristol’s posts and ones in which I’m honest about my disagreement. Thank goodness Bristol and her Patheos moderators are not scared to allow me to voice my opinions. The fact that you think that I “can’t take” your responses to me is silly. Who gives two sh–s what anyone says in cyberspace? You comment, and then I comment, and then you comment…and then I turn off my computer and get back to real life! As Bristol posted months ago…”I’m No Victim.”

          • melory

            should be “beliefs” not “believes”

          • melory

            You obviously care what other say judging from your responses.

            And it matters what you say in cyberspace – especially when you bear false witness like you did about Bristol’s mom. Your act all innocent, only you are not.

            If you were judged by people who profess God, it is sad. But the way you throw it out here was an accusation against innocent Christians.

            If you want us to go down that road – we can.

            You have liberal and conservatives Christians in America today.

            It is possible that those who judged you were liberal Christians – they are the ones who do not even believe your child has a right to life – I can see how they could call your innocent child the names they did.

            Conservative Christians are the ones standing up and fighting for these babies, trying to convince liberals that these babies are innocent, cannot be punished for the mistakes of the parents, and has a right to life, and a right to be born into this world.

            So you see, it is hard to believe that the conservative Christian who is risking everything to save these babies are the ones that call them “bastards”.

          • TrueBlue

            OK. Whatever you say. Good-bye, Melory.

        • melory

          Good-bye, Trueblue.

          • TrueBlue

            A final thought: just a quick note (for the road) about Congressman Scott DesJarlais, a Republican from Tennessee (don’t dare call him a liberal). Here’s what he says about himself on his official Website:

            “The DesJarlais family is active in the Epiphany Episcopal Church of Sherwood, Tennessee… All life should be cherished and protected. We are pro-life.”

            Good ol’ Scott was handily reelected recently, despite the fact that it was made public that he had no problem with abortion when it suited him.

            http://www.redstate.com/2013/01/10/tn-4-scott-desjarlais-must-go/

            Even the folks at Red State were over him, called him a “black mark on our brand.” So, Melory, Conservative Christians have their bad eggs, too. I’m sure you wouldn’t do what Congressman DesJarlais did, but I also know some good liberal Christians who wouldn’t abort a child, either. You don’t know what’s in the heart of every man, good or bad.

            I’m sure you’ll have an ingenious way of explaining this one. You always do. :)

        • melory

          “TN-4 should provide us with the first opportunity to throw out a weak incumbent and replace him with one of our guys.” That means with a true conservative. It may come as a surprise to you, but their are liberals in the Republican party, they are called RINO or CINO.

          • TrueBlue

            So DesJarlais is really a liberal who ran on the Republican ticket? What explains his win? The TN electorate is full of RINOs? For once, you’re right about me…I AM surprised! I never would have guessed that Tennessee was a blue state.

        • melory

          “So DesJarlais is really a liberal who ran on the Republican ticket?”. Yep, and he is not the only one.

          Notice that now that they have found out who he really is, they admit that they have made a mistake, and they are planning on throwing him out. Unlike Dems who circle the wagons around their corrupt leaders.

          But don’t you go judging the TN electorate. You voted for Obama knowing that he VOTED AGAINST medical care for infants born alive after a failed abortion attempt. What is your excuse.

          • TrueBlue

            Or perhaps, the case may be that DesJarlais made mistakes in the past, readily admitted to them, and the TN electorate have decided that, despite his mistakes, DesJarlais is the best man for the job and it’s time to move on. I’ve also read that, too. You’re the one who’s judged the TN electorate by claiming they’ve made a terrible mistake and have voted in a “RINO.”

        • melory

          “but I also know some good liberal Christians who wouldn’t abort a child, either. You don’t know what’s in the heart of every man, good or bad.”

          But how do these liberal Christians justify standing by silently while babies are being slaughtered not in the womb only, but now as infants? Why are they supporting the Dem-party whose top leaders support these evil practices?

          I’m sure you’ll have an ingenious way of explaining this one. You always do.

          • TrueBlue

            How many babies have YOU saved from the abortion table, Melory? I’m not talking paying lip service. When was the last time you stormed an abortion clinic, pulled the patient off the table, took her in, supported her when she was pregnant, and then raised the baby up once it was born, or at least saw to it that the baby was carefully placed in a safe home? What’s that? No? You haven’t done that yet? Then how can you stand by while babies are BEING SLAUGHTERED?!

        • melory

          Maybe this, maybe that as you say regarding DesJ and the TN electorate. You and I don’t know.

          But what we do know is that you voted for Obama knowing his horrible views and his votes that faciliates infanticide.

          • melory

            typo – should be facilitates.

          • TrueBlue

            “But what we do know is that you voted for Obama knowing his horrible views and his votes that faciliates infanticide.” Non sequitur. What I believe about abortion isn’t relevant to the fact that you can’t explain (using your faulty logic and extreme judgment of anyone who claims to be a liberal) why the TN electorate voted in a man who calls himself a Christian, is a Conservative, and was partly responsible for more than one abortion.

        • melory

          “…why the TN electorate voted in a man who calls himself a Christian, is a Conservative, and was partly responsible for more than one abortion”

          I thought Thotovc explained that to you!

          As for the TN electorate, why don’t you ask them, I am not one of them! But I have you here, so tell me why did you vote for Obama knowing his disregard for innocent human life? It is a relevant question, we were talking about abortion, that is why you posted the article.

      • Vanessa Stockwell

        Great point Melory! That is another lie by this author. Everyone knows that if you accept Christ and repent of your sins ANY sin, you are forgiven.

  • http://yahoo.com john norton

    “Keep on Truckin” ,^5-BP … ~ !

  • Thotocv

    Melory the point if the article is that the Church teaches that sex outside of marriage is a sin. But then it turns around and says after you’ve done it that its not such a big deal. Which is a good tactic because like I said, the vast majority of people do have sex outside of marriage.

    • CJ

      All sin is a big deal and it has consequesnces, which is why GOD implores us to STOP. HE is trying to protect us, but do we listen? Some consequences happen right away, some occur later, but they happen. Then we blame GOD. ???

  • Tootie

    I didn’t read the article but if girls are being advised to wait until marriage, that is wise counsel. Boys and men are being selfish and what they are doing has nothing to do with love. Doing things Jesus’ way always brings blessings and no regrets. I love you, Bristol. (And I REALLY like Geno!)

  • Thotocv

    That’s an odd comment Tootie. If you think girls should wait until marriage why don’t you say the same to boys? Double standard? Personally, I don’t agree that people ” should” wait until
    Marriage for sex ( and the fact is, it is very rare to wait) but if you are going to advise that, I don’t understand advising one gender and not the other.

  • Thotocv

    Vanessa, Plan B should be available over the counter and I’m glad it is. If you are opposed to Plan B or other contraception , you don’t have to buy it. Just ignore it. Move along…..

    And no, sex before marriage is not a big deal. In fact, it’s the norm and that’s nothing new. And if it ( or marital sex for that matter) ends in abortion, it might be a big deal for the woman but not as big a deal as having the child, raising it or putting up for adoption. The choice is different for different women depending on their beliefs and situation.

    • Vanessa Stockwell

      You think in this way because you are not a true follower of Christ. Christians understand why God set rules for us to follow, not to prohibit us, but to free us and prevent us pain and suffering. But this doesn’t make sense to a non-Christian, nor can they comprehend it.


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