Top 7 Bible Verses About Resolving Conflict

Top 7 Bible Verses About Resolving Conflict June 30, 2016

Here are seven great Bible verses that relate to conflict and how to avoid it.

Proverbs 15:1 “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

The way to settle conflict is not who can shout the loudest. Why not put the issue at the center of the conflict and not the people. A simple reminder of the so-called “love chapter” should help as the Apostle Paul wrote, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful” (1st Cor 13:4-5). Since godly love “believes all things” (1st Cor 13:6), we should give people the benefit of the doubt and speak in calm tones when dealing with conflict. This tends to turn the away the wrath.

James 4:1-2 “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask.”

James is not only addressing conflict between people but also between nations. War comes from coveting what other nations have, like gold, diamonds, forests, oil, or any other natural resources. Some desire possessions so much that they are willing to murder for it, or at least rob someone of their money or car. James nails the cause; greed, covetousness, and quarrels are the things that start wars. Wars have even begun when tempers flared.

Proverbs 15:18 “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.”

Solomon is showing polar opposites in personalities. On one side, there is strife coming from a hot-tempered man or woman. On the other side is the one who is slow to anger and can quite the contentious and calm the conflict. If you have to deal with conflict, prefer the second man or woman. If you prefer anger, strife, and conflict, chose the hot-tempered man or woman.

A-soft-answer-turns-away

Ecclesiastes 10:4 “If the anger of the ruler rises against you, do not leave your place, for calmness will lay great offenses to rest.”

Solomon knew what he was talking about where a ruler rises against someone because some in his own family did. He gave some great advice to. When “the ruler rises against you,” which could be your employer in your case, stay where you are because “calmness will lay great offenses to rest.” We have read a consistent pattern in all of these verses so far in trying to resolve conflict; soft answers, calm demeanors, and slowness to anger. All of these helpful in extinguishing conflict.

Ephesians 4:26 “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger”

God actually gives us permission to be angry. Not permission to hate, but to be angry, but to be angry at the right things. God displays righteous indignation, like Jesus did when He cleansed the temple of the money changers. He was good and mad…but He never sinned. We can be angry about the things that make God angry, but Paul warns us to “not sin.” He also says don’t let the sun go down on your anger,” meaning don’t let it linger. Resolve it. Forgive others and ask for forgiveness if you need too.

Proverbs 25:5 “With patience a ruler may be persuaded, and a soft tongue will break a bone.”

The Book of Proverbs has a lot to say about conflict and how to deal with it, but the above verse is very specific in how it connects patience with persuasion. In other words, a ruler is more likely to be persuaded by patience and a soft tongue than they are any other way. To “break a bone” isn’t literal. It simply shows how strong the persuasion of a soft tongue and patience are in persuading a ruler.

Proverbs 16:32 “Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.”

I love this proverb because it compares the strength of a person’s character who can keep themselves under control to someone who can take a city. In the ancient days a city was not like cities today. These were “city-states” and essentially, nations, like Nineveh and Jericho, so being slow to anger and being able to rule (or control) their temper is a person who can deal very well with conflict.

Conclusion

Unless a person is born again, they can’t deal with conflict quite as well as those who are saved because they don’t have the Spirit of God which produce fruits of the Spirit like “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Gal 5:22-23). That’s why when you speak of Christ, they get angry or apathetic. The Apostle Paul wrote in Romans 8:7 that “the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot.” Peter tried to deal with conflict in his flesh by pulling out his sword and cutting off the high priest’s servant, but Jesus said to him, “Put your sword back into its place. For all who take the sword will perish by the sword” (Matt 26:52) and He healed the servants ear. We can help to reduce conflicts in relationships or in meetings by remaining calm, using a soft voice with quiet tones, and being slow to anger.

Article by Jack Wellman

Jack Wellman is Pastor of the Mulvane Brethren Church in Mulvane Kansas. Jack is also the Senior Writer at What Christians Want To Know whose mission is to equip, encourage, and energize Christians and to address questions about the believer’s daily walk with God and the Bible. You can follow Jack on Google Plus or check out his book Teaching Children the Gospel available on Amazon.


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