Church Sign Epic Fails, “God Likes Weed” Edition

When God gets the munchies, does he order take out, or does he just, like, *POOF* and there’s some pizza there?

This explains the sloth. Makes me feel surprisingly better about eternity in heaven too…and hungry…

Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s just the weed.

 

Three cheers for being Christlike! Oh, and also for the separation of church and state.

I had a girlfriend that pooped on my heart once. Thought I’d NEVER get that thing clean again.

Oh, great. Next thing you know, God’s going to just start sending emoticons and spelling “you” with the letter “u” and spelling “cause” like “cuz.” Spell it out, God!!! Stop being lazy.

You know, the last time I asked God for a loan, I went to church and they passed me this plate full of money! Church rocks!

You know that space between the two “agains” is for the, um, you know…refractory period. Happens to all of us. Not a big deal.

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Crush China for Jesus” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails: “Satan’s Graffiti” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Beer in Hell” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Soul Harvest” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, Advent Onslaught Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Big Ass” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Force-Fed Faith” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, Hangover Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Chocolate Chip Christ” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, Vol. (x = 40-3)

CHECK OUT THE VIDEO EDITIONS OF CHURCH SIGN EPIC FAILS:

VIDEO Church Sign Epic Fails, “Big Ass” Edition

“Satan’s Graffiti” VIDEO edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

“Beer in Hell” VIDEO Edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

“Advent Onslaught” VIDEO Edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

“Faith vs. Reason Throwdown” VIDEO Edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

“Chocolate Chip Christ” VIDEO Edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

Church Sign Epic Fails VIDEO Debut

About Christian Piatt

Christian Piatt is the creator and editor of BANNED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE BIBLE and BANNED QUESTIONS ABOUT JESUS. He co-created and co-edits the “WTF: Where’s the Faith?” young adult series with Chalice Press, and he has a memoir on faith, family and parenting being published in early 2012 called PREGMANCY: A Dad, a Little Dude and a Due Date.

  • http://twitter.com/S8th Seth Callahan

    “I had a girlfriend that pooped on my heart once. Thought I’d NEVER get that thing clean again.” Boston is a crazy place….

  • M. N. Taylor

    Rom 1:32 should be the “call down the wrath of the Secret Service” verse, the one that says the subject is “worthy of death.”

  • Marta L.

    The lead-up to Romans 1:32 calls out people who “are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, and malice. They are gossips, slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their pairents; they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless.”

    I’m honestly trying to figure out (a) what Obama has done that earns him that label, specifically; and (b) how anyone doesn’t bump up against at least one of those categories…


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