Church Sign Epic Fails, “Monster of Hell” Edition

When I told the pastor near my house I was taking a picture of his sign for my religion blog, he was thrilled. Pretty sure he hasn’t seen my religion blog…

They must be talking about network TV. Clearly they’ve never watched HBO.

You know, I would, but there are all those words, and then I start to get really sleepy and…hey look! Frasier’s on TNT!

Yes, just sign the member ledger, and then you can burn it!

Dude, don’t tell Jesus there was a key there the whole time or he’ll be wicked pissed.

I was trying really hard to yield interest, and then I found out my soul was short-sold fifteen years ago. D’oh!

I’m not sure you can call a religious institution that’s been preaching out of the same book for two thousand years anything but stale, but I’ll take your word for it.

I told Jesus no one wanted to hang out with me. He told me to suck it up and just ask a chick out on a date already. Yeah, like that’s gonna happen.

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To learn about Christian Piatt's new project, "A**hole Christian Survival Guide," and to pre-order your copy, visit The humorous illustrated book will include Christian cliches, games and a lot more.

  • Michael Mock

    And really, why sell your soul when a simple lend-lease arrangement can be so much more profitable in this day and age?

  • DCFem

    Did you tell the pastor the name of your blog so he can look up the picture? I’d love to hear his reaction.

    • Christian Piatt

      Actually no. He just seemed happy it was going on a blog. Didn’t seem to care where :-/