Church Sign Epic Fails, “Drop It Like It’s Hot” Edition

I once prayed for tickets to the Radiohead concert, and instead I got two tickets for Carly Rae Jepsen. I must have prayed in the wrong direction…

See grandpa? All those hours I spent in my room listening to Snoop and smoking funny cigarettes really paid off!

Kids, this is what happens when someone gets sent by God to earth by Media Mail. Always go first class!

So, not only will your skin be seared off your body for all of eternity, but you’ll also be seated right next to the guy who always ate his boogers in high school.

…and for every enemy combatant, there is a drone…

I saw the Harlem Globetrotters dribble a football once. So I guess they’re going to heaven no matter what!

It’s also a long time to wish you had paid better attention in grammar school.

And for all of you who have a less than ideal relationship with dear old mom, relax. They’ve got you covered. Remember, Lucifer was an angel too. Cheers!

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About Christian Piatt

Christian Piatt is the creator and editor of BANNED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE BIBLE and BANNED QUESTIONS ABOUT JESUS. He has a memoir on faith, family and parenting called PREGMANCY: A Dad, a Little Dude and a Due Date, and Hachette published his first hardcover book, "postChristian: What's left? Can we fix it? Do we care?" in 2014. His first novel, "Blood Doctrine," has been optioned by a Hollywood production company for a possible TV series.

Christian is the cofounder and cohost of the Homebrewed CultureCast, a podcast about popular culture, current events and spirituality that has a weekly audience of 25,000 people (http://homebrewedchristianity.com/category/culturecast/).

Preorder Christian's next book, "Not That Kind of Christian: Loving God without being an a**hole," at https://squareup.com/market/christianpiatt.

For more information about Christian, visit www.christianpiatt.com, or find him on Twitter (www.twitter.com/christianpiatt) or Facebook.

  • Whit Johnstone

    “Lucifer was an angel too”. Excellent joke to go with the sign I found, thanks.


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