Church Sign Epic Fails, “Church Phobia” Edition

I have never run short on bad church signs to share, but in honor of Labor Day (hey, why not?), I am actually including a couple of my favorite church sing wins. Enjoy!

Also precipitated by churches who tell you how you feel and why…but that’s just a theory. Never happens in real life.

Because I’m closer to death, I get it. Thanks, I feel so much better now.

This is actually one of the best church signs ever, IMHO.

Welcome! No, not you. The good one behind you…

Another truly excellent church sign WIN. Come on guys…you can do this!!!

Yep, he crushed me, shredded me and turned me into a soda can. Not exactly what I expected, but it’s kinda like reincarnation, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah…so where the hell is my pony???

About Christian Piatt

Christian Piatt is the creator and editor of BANNED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE BIBLE and BANNED QUESTIONS ABOUT JESUS. He co-created and co-edits the “WTF: Where’s the Faith?” young adult series with Chalice Press, and he has a memoir on faith, family and parenting being published in early 2012 called PREGMANCY: A Dad, a Little Dude and a Due Date.

  • Worthless Beast

    I laughed out loud at the recycling one.

    The last one: You don’t want a pony, unless you’re rich, anyway. Trust me, I used to do stable-hand work as the poor-servant hired-help. Horses are wonderful animals, but lots of work, and when you have to scoop their leavings every day… And the ponies – Shetlands and the like… are the worst. It’s like “How can so much come out of you, you little thing?!!!”


CLOSE | X

HIDE | X