Church Sign Epic Fails, “Badass Jesus” Edition

Taking a departure from heinous church signs today to delve into the disturbingly rich landscape of badass Jesus iconography. Like them, or Jesus will personally rip you in half. [Read more…]

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Cow Gang” Edition

I once came up on a cow gang. They was like, “Yo, gimme all your milk, biped,” and I was all “TIP.” That was the end of that. [Read more…]

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Clothing Optional” Edition

So I showed up naked to this church and got the weirdest looks. Hey, if you’re gonna make it an option, I’m gonna hold you to it. Better than holding it to you, eh? (Ba dum bum!)   [Read more…]

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Longer Than Sex” edition

You know, it’s bad enough trying to compete with the media’s portrayal of beauty and sexuality without God being better at THAT than me too…   [Read more…]

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Fuzzy Math” Edition

So many people claim to be bad at math, which is why I always pay anyone who does work for me in rainbows and belly button lint. So far, so good! [Read more…]

Church Sign Epic Fails, “God Created Sex” Edition

On the third day, God created sex…which was good because Eve was all kinds of stacked. I mean, like POW! Amen, my sister.   [Read more…]

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Biblical Marriage” Edition

I was told to maintain a biblical marriage. Anybody know where I can get me a red tent and some concubines? [Read more…]

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Size Matters” Edition

I was getting all self-conscious that my faith wasn’t big enough, but then God reminded me it’s how you use it that matters more than. Pssshhh! Yeah, whatever. [Read more…]


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