North Korea, Those Zany Non-Kardashian Kims, and Professor Dennis Rodman, Voice of Sanity

 

A major foreign-policy breakthrough!

 

Time will tell whether Dear Leader Kim Jong-un  measures up to the high standard set by his Dear Leader father, who was definitely a hard act to follow.

 

For a list of some of the titles applied to the late, lamented Kim Jong-Il, see here.

 

Kim Jong-Il, we barely knew ye

 

On 1 April 2013 (yes, really), owing to his great achievements in leading North Korea to even greater glory and prosperity than it had already enjoyed, Kim Jong-un became an honorary citizen of Damaturu City in the Yobe State of Nigeria.

 

Kim Jong-un, Great Leader, Honorary Nigerian, Seeker of Love

 

Dennis Rodman, the noted diplomat and foreign policy expert, returning from a February visit to North Korea, has explained that Kim Jong-un “just wants to be loved.”  Rodman plans to return to Pyongyang in August, so that he and Kim can “just hang and have some fun.”

 

Herr Prof. Dr. Dennis Rodman

 

Before leaving the National Basketball Association, Rodman was noted for his uneasiness at being around Mormons.  Indeed, during the 1997 NBA Finals, which were held partially in Salt Lake City, Rodman was so uncomfortable in Utah, a place that he found very weird, oppressive, and deeply bizarre, that he was obliged to flee to the normalcy of Las Vegas two nights in a row.

 

Las Vegas by night

 

Now, though, Las Vegas is so twentieth century.  The new happening place is Pyongyang, where the night life is hot because, well, the nights are . . . really, really dark.

 

The Korean Peninsula by night.
Notice Seoul.
Notice Pyongyang, if you can find it.
Notice the difference
between North and South.

 

What happens in Pyongyang stays in Pyongyang.  Additionally, all the food produced by surrounding areas goes to Pyongyang and stays there.  Except when it’s parceled out to the Army.  And everybody born in North Korea stays there.  And so do cell phone messages.  Using cellular phones is, or at least was last year, a “war crime.”

 

I’m not making this up.

 

Really.  I’m not.

 

 

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  • Lucy Mcgee

    Rodman’s visit to North Korea offers a glaring example of the “cult of personality”, so very much on display in our world today. People buy in and money is made as advertisers flock to the latest media sensation. Donald Trump has invited Rodman back to Celebrity Apprentice. What a joke.

    For any American to do a pleasure visit to a regime responsible for the daily torture and death of tens of thousands of its own citizens in gulags, is beyond belief. Either Dennis Rodman is uninformed or doesn’t care. And why, after all of Donald Trump’s bellicose rhetoric, would he hire this guy? Perhaps Trump is feeling a little down after the Scottish government made the decision to build an offshore wind farm in view of his billion dollar exclusive golfing resort.

  • http://www.whatdomormonsbelieve.com Thad Gillespie

    I think Rodman’s visits could have a positive impact. When a country is controlled so tightly by a single person, that person’s psyche is magnified to the state level. Rodman is the proverbial jock purposefully sitting next to the insecure, lonely, and victimized geek in the lunchroom (at least he believes he’s the victim).
    Give Kim Jong-Un a reason to believe he has an ally in the United States and he just may gain some confidence, loosen his defensive posture, and allow his people to eat.

    • danpeterson

      We can hope.

    • Kent G. Budge

      Are you suggesting that Kim Jong-Un is psychologically similar to an American high school geek? Really?

      • http://www.whatdomormonsbelieve.com Thad Gillespie

        Yes, Kent. You seem unwilling to even countenance such a suggestion. Why?

        • Kent G. Budge

          Because, as a lifelong geek, I find the comparison deeply insulting.

          • http://www.whatdomormonsbelieve.com Thaddeus

            Funny, I was going to use my geek-dom credentials as evidence for my claim.
            As an introverted and sometimes picked-on teen, there was nothing I fantasized about more than megalomania. I created whole worlds in my head and I was the architect-in-chief. Were I somehow given great authority at that time, a North Korean-like regime would have been plausible (though I hope my faith-filled upbringing would have prevented me from violent atrocities).

  • Kent G. Budge

    Dan, while you’re collecting funny photoshops of Kim Jong-Un, here’s one I first saw at National Review that made me laugh out loud.
    http://birkenheaddrill.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/pic_slideshow_040313_SM_kim20.jpg
    Of course, it’s a grim laugh.


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