For the birds

Over the weekend, I took the plunge and upgraded my mobile phone.  (I got an EVO, if anyone is wondering.)

This thing is a marvel that would not be out of place at Spacely Sprockets.  It keeps my calendar, takes my pictures, shoots my video, finds my destination, locates a restaurant, and even provides me with the Liturgy of the Hours — along with a gazillion other applications that can allow me to read the New York Times, catch a video on YouTube and keep track of that ugly winter storm that’s going to slap us silly Thursday night.

I have the world at my fingertips, literally.  Yet what do I spend most of my time doing?  How do I burn off most of my battery life?

Playing Angry Birds.

Seriously.

I could be reading a novel I’ve downloaded from the Kindle app, or checking the latest breaking news from the BBC.  I could be learning a new language or finding a new Thai restaurant in Queens.

Instead, I’m hurling birds into bricks. I’m catapulting them through shattering glass and splintering beams of wood.

And I’m enjoying it.  Really.   I’m letting out little whoops when the pigs get flattened.  Life is good when you’re an Angry Bird.

There is something weirdly, morbidly, insanely addictive about this game.  Maybe it’s the funny little “oinks” that the pigs make, or the “ayeeee!” screams of the birds as they embark on their bonzai dives to death.  Maybe it’s the frustrating challenge of it all, trying desperately to unlock the next step and test your skills.

Or maybe it is the deeper underlying message of the Angry Birds ethos: they are out for justice — or, perhaps, revenge — and are willing to die for what they believe in.  They are martyrs for a cause — give us back the eggs, you filthy pigs! — and are fearlessly surrendering their lives for a greater good.  (Do I detect a sacrificial Christian theme in there?  Okay.  Maybe not.)

Then again, maybe it’s much simpler.   Maybe my Angry Birds fetish is about something  more mundane.

Maybe it’s…therapeutic.

In the end, after all, it all comes down to this: in a world consumed by chaos and confusion, when it all seems to be too much, I can always whip out my phone and just flip the bird.

Ah.  Yes.  Life is good.

  • http://redcardigan.blogspot.com/ Erin Manning

    Deacon Kandra, I’ve never even played this game, but I have to tell you: this is one of the best-written blog posts I have read in a long time. The description of the phone, of what it can do, the lead-in to the admission as to what you actually do with it, rolling inexorably to the groaner at the end of the second-to-last paragraph: perfection. Well done!

  • Dcn. Richard Ballard

    From a fellow Angry Birds lover: download the Mighty Eagle! It comes in handy when the pigs won’t budge.

  • oldestof9

    AMEN, BROTHER!
    Doncha luvit???

    I may have to borrow your “Christian theme” for a homily. I am willing to bet that at least half of the congregation will know what I’m talking about.

    Peace to all

  • Elizabeth M

    Too funny. My husband has written about Angry Birds on his games blog.

    http://www.stateofplayblog.com/2010/07/app-o-mornin-angry-birds.html

    He’s a freelance writer (including for National Catholic Register) and has written about games for more than 20 years. He also had a feature on Patheos not long ago.

    Hope you don’t mind my sharing. Just thought you’d enjoy a fellow Angry Birder!


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