Demons Captured on Film!

The Worldnutdaily says that someone has actually managed to catch real demons on film — and they’re apparently not talking about Tom Cruise or Steven Seagal. These demons can only be seen in infrared.

Author, filmmaker and former NFL defensive back Ken Klein, who stunned viewers with his recent “Trans-Humanism: Destroying the Barriers” DVD, has launched another cataclysmic report: That fallen angels exist, are on Earth, and have been filmed…

“It’s not a joke,” he said. “We have filmed these things in the infrared spectrum, and it’s really real, and it’s really happening on this planet, and it’s getting worse and worse,” he said.

“You can see them in the infrared spectrum as we’ve filmed them. These are those angels that once followed Lucifer, who were deceived, woo’d by him with a great sales pitch, and as a result of that war God decided that he would have to be thrown out of his angelship. And he was thrown into this world, and he’s got billions of followers that are assigned to humanity – some to each human – to monitor each one of us, because each one of us is a potential threat. We shall be called children of God and he hates that because he’s been judged, and he’s not a happy camper,” Klein said.

Believe it or not, it actually gets crazier:

“Jesus’ physical body had to be tailor-made through the development of generations of specific genes that would pass down to Mary and allow for the Immaculate Conception. It wasn’t just any body that the Spirit of God could dwell in. And so Jesus body came through a very specific line of predecessors. The integrity of His physical DNA was managed through the purity of a specific line of people all the way back to Adam,” Klein said.

“I think we can expect the same thing to happen with the body that Lucifer will have to take, because we know that there will be an Antichrist who will be the embodiment of the spirit of Lucifer, who was an archangel. It can’t just be any body; it’s going to have to be an engineered body,” he said.

“Now we have the science to merge all kinds of brilliant scientists and thinkers into a genetic soup that could bring forth a superior intelligence – and not only that, but a superior body – that could house the spirit of Lucifer.”

He said the technologies will come together to unveil “a body that could house the spirit of Satan.”

None of this is necessary, of course. The spirit of Satan already inhabits the body of Kenny G.

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Michael Heath

    This tops Batboy.

  • Larry

    Oh, waitress, I’ll have what he’s having.

  • DaveL

    Many years ago, there was a nut on the JREF forums whose schtick was looking for face-like patterns in the random noise and JPGE compression in pictures of dark rooms. I wonder if he was in any way involved in this.

  • blindrobin

    I just wonder what evil cabal is putting the acid in these folks coffee, Pinky and the Brain maybe?

  • jamessweet

    The thing about the specific genes in Mary is an odd one, because the NT goes out of its way to list the genealogy of Joseph all the way back to Adam, but not that of Mary. And as we all know, Joseph wasn’t involved.

    Or was he? That the Bible so meticulously lists Joseph’s genealogy might suggest to a skeptical observer that maybe the mythology got switcherooed somewhere along the line. But nah, better to stop asking questions and start putting Bibles in innocent kids’ trick-or-treat baskets, right?

  • http://polrant@blogspot.com democommie

    Ed:

    “None of this is necessary, of course. The spirit of Satan already inhabits the body of Kenny G.”

    I’m sorry, I must disagree with you on this.

    There are, after all, some things so heinously out of bounds that a lab rat, a PI lawyer, D.C. lobbyist or EVEN a demon will not stoop to do them. No, Kenny G.’s body is not inhabited by demons. His horn, however, is; there is no other explanation for what comes out of it. Has anyone ever seen both Kenny G. and Michael Bolton on the same stage? I think not. If both of them were to occupy the same space and time, the resultant explosion caused by the critical massing chain reaction of schlock would obliterate the universe.

  • Artor

    Aww, I was hoping for a link to the video. Ken’s right though. This is not a joke. He is.

  • wherearemybeets

    This is what happens when you play football without a helmet.

  • Strategically Shaved Monkey

    Infra-red?

    What sort of weak-assed demons are these? Surely hell would have warmed them enough to emit UV or X-rays.

    How did he get the demons’ backstories? Did he interview them in infra-sound?

    So many questions and so little time before science creates the T1000 Antichrist.

  • raven

    These are those angels that once followed Lucifer, who were deceived, woo’d by him with a great sales pitch, and as a result of that war God decided that he would have to be thrown out of his angelship.

    I’ve seen xians lunatics make this claim before.

    AFAIK, this war in heaven isn’t actually mentioned in the bible. I’ve looked before and didn’t find it anyway. Satan the Adversary starts out late in the bible as god’s buddy and his evolution doesn’t really get going until the NT.

    Milton made the war up in his book, Paradise Lost about a millennia later.

    There is a war in heaven in the bible. Revelation, John’s drug trip. But it hasn’t happened yet. All the events in that book are set in a future time and none have yet happened.

    Much of the Rapture end times god babble isn’t really mentioned either. Xians had to cobble togetehr a lot of vague passages from the OT and NT to invent in.

  • http://religionsetspolitics.blogspot.com/ joshuaz

    As is usually the case, this “article” is primarily a promotion for buying some stuff from WND.

  • LightningRose

    “Jesus’ physical body had to be tailor-made through the development of generations of specific genes that would pass down to Mary and allow for the Immaculate Conception. It wasn’t just any body that the Spirit of God could dwell in. And so Jesus body came through a very specific line of predecessors. The integrity of His physical DNA was managed through the purity of a specific line of people all the way back to Adam,” Klein said.

    So, Mary was a Bene Gesserit, and the baby Jeebus was the Kwisatz Haderach?

  • http://festeringscabofrealityblogspot.com fifthdentist

    PCP’s one hell of a drug.

  • Aquaria

    Has anyone ever seen both Kenny G. and Michael Bolton on the same stage? I think not.

    Sorry to burst your bubble, but my in-laws went to a Kenny G/Michael Bolton concert at Shoreline Amphitheater. As they memorably remarked about the occasion:

    “We’ve never seen that much hair on one stage.”

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=730511544 billdaniels

    The Immaculate Conception refers to Mary’s birth, not Jesus’s.

  • TheAllen

    LightningRose@12 beat me to it.

    Klein needs to lay off the spice coffee.

  • http://www.youtube.com/user/RiffingReligion Wes

    The prophecy continues, “And there arose a smoke out of the pit, as the smoke of a great furnace; and the sun and the air were darkened by reason of the smoke of the pit. … And there came out of the smoke locusts (or mantises) upon the earth.”

    Not only does his science suck, but his biblical scholarship looks rather shoddy too. Correct me if I’m wrong, but the Greek word used in that passage is ἄκρις, which does not mean “mantis”. The Greek term for mantis is κραγγών, if I’m not mistaken.

  • http://rationaldreaming.com tacitus

    The fascinating thing about Klein’s “theory” is his need to validate what is clearly supposed to be a one-off supernatural event using what he believes is a close approximation to science.

    This is like creationists writing entire books on how it was possible for Noah to house, feed, and water the entire animal kingdom (or the recent ancestors thereof) for over a year on the Ark. I mean, what’s the point? It’s supposed to be a miracle. Science doesn’t get a look in. There are no rules, laws, or theories. All bets are all.

    Isn’t funny how all these people “Bible-beliving” Christians are so reluctant to say “God did it?” and leave it at that?

  • Putting On The Foil

    If you watch the trailer, notice the people that are all suited up… He is talking about the evils of biology research, but showing microchip production. This is probably because it looks far more ominous than people in lab coats whose faces are visible.

  • http://rockstarramblings.blogspot.com/ Bronze Dog

    The silliness is funny up until you remember that these sorts of people who can run for office and actually win.

  • Reginald Selkirk

    “Jesus’ physical body had to be tailor-made through the development of generations of specific genes that would pass down to Mary and allow for the Immaculate Conception.

    This is silly on so many levels.

    * An obscure requirement no one else ever heard of, but the writer states it as a fact.

    * Who sets these rules that god must follow? Why couldn’t God just snap His fingers and create those genes, instead of developing them over many generations?

  • monimonika

    “Now we have the science to merge all kinds of brilliant scientists and thinkers into a genetic soup that could bring forth a superior intelligence – and not only that, but a superior body – that could house the spirit of Lucifer.”

    Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal points out the technical problems with this line of thinking…

    http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2351#comic

  • nimsudo

    It’s like someone watched Supernatural and thought it was actually a documentary.

  • Nentuaby

    Democommie:

    Apparently, the universe survived this filming.. How, I’m not sure.

  • mcmillan

    Gah Nentuaby, I missed that you were responding to Democommie and clicked. Luckily I had Flogging Molly playing on my computer loud enough to protect me

  • http://nikkane.blogspot.com nikkane

    Can someone point me to the current edition of the peer reviewed journal on demon spectroscopy?

  • jnorris

    Steve Austin IS the Antichrist!

  • jakc

    Sure, Christians love to talk about Satan and the fallen angels (despite the relative lack of biblical text on the matter) but when Mormons do that, why that’s crazy talk.

  • ambulocetacean

    Meh. This is nothing new. Your American general William Boykin famously photographed a demon when he was in Somalia.

    http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/09/15/60II/main643650.shtml

    Besides, this sort of shit is on the Discovery channel every day.

  • matty1

    There is a war in heaven in the bible. Revelation, John’s drug trip. But it hasn’t happened yet. All the events in that book are set in a future time and none have yet happened.

    That’s the most common view but in every translation I’ve seen (I can’t read 1st Century Greek) the book is in the past tense, full of phrases like “and then I saw”. In my opinion the idea that John was using bizzare imagery as a metaphor for events in his own time like the sack of Jerusalem seems more likely.

  • robb

    Democommie @24:

    ugh. you just kennyrolled me! you bastard!

  • raven

    That’s the most common view but in every translation I’ve seen (I can’t read 1st Century Greek) the book is in the past tense, full of phrases like “and then I saw”.

    That is because John is recounting his vision after the fact.

    If you read the beginning and end of Revelation, it clearly refers to future events. None of which have yet taken place.

    Epilogue:12 “Look, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to each person according to what they have done. 13 I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.

    Among other problems with Revelation is that it was just completely wrong in its predictions of the future. Whatever god/jesus meant by “soon”, it’s 2,000 years later and nothing yet has happened.