Bryan Fischer Award Nominee: Sarah Palin

The Bryan Fischer award is given to those who display a staggering lack of self-awareness, for psychological projection above and beyond the call of duty. Sarah Palin, please come claim your award. And readers, please turn off your irony meters as we prepare for takeoff.

I do think that Newt is the one who won the debate, if you will, because Newt came out just like South Carolina’s own Smokin’ Joe Frazier. He came out there swinging, talking about work. Talking about jobs. Talking about work ethic. …

If I were a South Carolinian — and each one of these primaries and caucuses are different, Sean — I want to see this thing continue because iron sharpens iron. Steel sharpens steel. These guys are getting better in their debates. … If I had to vote in South Carolina, in order to keep this thing going, I’d vote for Newt. And I would want things to continue. More debates, more vetting of candidates. Because we know the mistake made in our country four years ago, with having a candidate that was not vetted to the degree he should have been.

You know who knows that better than anyone? John McCain, who picked Sarah Palin as his running mate on the spur of the moment with virtually no research. Shortly after she was nominated, we sent a reporter up to Wasila to start looking into Palin’s background. She went to the city archives to start digging through documents from Palin’s tenure as mayor and casually said to the person working there that she must be tired of people coming there to research Palin — and was told that she was the first person who had done so. No one from the McCain campaign even looked at her record as mayor before she was nominated.

About Ed Brayton

After spending several years touring the country as a stand up comedian, Ed Brayton tired of explaining his jokes to small groups of dazed illiterates and turned to writing as the most common outlet for the voices in his head. He has appeared on the Rachel Maddow Show and the Thom Hartmann Show, and is almost certain that he is the only person ever to make fun of Chuck Norris on C-SPAN.

  • Reginald Selkirk

    we sent a reporter…

    Undefined antecedent. Who are we?

  • lofgren

    Meh. Have you seen the latest crop of presidential candidates? How their leaders actually govern is clearly not that important an issue for the republican party.

  • marcus

    “He came out there swingin’, talkin’ about work. Talkin’ about jobs. Talkin’ about work ethic. …” There FIFY

    You know that “g”‘s at the ends of words are only used by the multi-cultural elite. Palin will have nothin’ to do with them.

  • Cuttlefish

    I don’t believe the Palin quote is accurate. Where it says

    He came out there swinging, talking about work. Talking about jobs. Talking about work ethic.

    it should say

    He came out there swingin’, talkin’ about work. Talkin’ about jobs. Talkin’ about work ethic.

  • Mr Ed

    because Newt came out just like South Carolina’s own Smokin’ Joe Frazier.

    Maybe they should look up the term “rope-a-dope” before scheduling the next 17 rounds of debates.

  • Doug Little

    iron sharpens iron. Steel sharpens steel

    Ah, not so much.

  • Doug Little

    I’m sorry Ed, when you said put your irony meters away you should have said in your irony proof boxes. The irony was so strong on this one that it arced to my unprotected meter and still blew the thing sky high.

  • http://www.holytape.etsy.com holytape

    “iron sharpens iron. Steel sharpens steel”

    Although I would love to see a debate between Palin and Perry. Because if steel sharpens steel, I would love to see what happens when you try to sharpen a rotten banana with another rotten banana. It would be an epic attempt by two public speakers to break the record for talking without forming a single complete sentence.

    (P.s. Normally one uses a grinding stone to sharpen metal. It’s a lot more effective.)

  • Michael Heath

    This is the second time over the past several days that Sarah Palin has criticized others in a way that demands we re-consider her own abhorrent behavior. In this case that would be how she distinguished herself amongst past VP nominees by helping the public vet them by being interviewed at the rate VP nominees normally get interviewed. Ms. Palin of course was rarely available to directly answer questions – for obvious reasons, she’s a misinformed delusional idiot who can’t even fake integrity.

    The first time was her tweeting a criticism of Newsweek publishing a recent cover article about Barack Obama that was written by Palin-critic Andrew Sullivan. Ms. Palin argued his analysis of the president wasn’t worthy of the public’s consideration because Sullivan reported she was not the biological mother of Trig. He didn’t, this is just one more of Ms. Palin’s continual lies, lies which occur so frequently it happens even when she has less than 141 characters available to make her point.

    So why would someone who went to great lengths to avoid her odd behavior and condition during her pregnancy and more importantly, the related baggage it raises if she were the mother, her mistreatment of her fetus both during her pregnancy and then her trip home from Texas, except if her need for publicity outweighed any iota of dignity she might still have? I think because her sink is shipping, fast.

    Regardless of whether Ed is right that she never sought higher office after quitting as governor or I’m right that she does want it, but only on her terms, both avenues require publicity and she ain’t getting much. Thus, we observe her reminding us of the very charges that caused the most discussion about her in spite of those two topics being ones she avoided most when she was enjoying attention. The more interesting question is whether she’s conscious of what’s she’s doing. I think she’s not, she’s delusionally doing it.

  • scienceavenger

    Maybe they should look up the term “rope-a-dope” before scheduling the next 17 rounds of debates.

    Sorry Mr. Ed, that was George Foreman that got rope-a-doped, not Joe Frazier. But I like the sentiment.

  • eric

    Wow, the guy nominates her for VP, and she throws him under the bus. Calls him unqualified to be President. The chutzpah.

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/dispatches Ed Brayton

    Reginald Selkirk wrote:

    Undefined antecedent. Who are we?

    The American Independent News Network, my former employer. We sent Laura McCann up there and she found some really interesting things in those archives.

  • marcus

    Also I don’t think Palin should only be a “nominee” I think she is a winner! She deserves the “LIfetime Achievement Award” if nothing else.

  • matty1

    He came out there swinging

    Given his marital record this would not surprise me, though the fact that in swinging everyone involved consents might be a new departure for him.

  • Doug Little

    matty1 @14,

    Bravo, one shiny internet to you sir.

  • d cwilson

    Palin keeps using that term “vetting” because she thinks it makes a clever code word for implying that Obama is some kind of secret Manchurian candidate. Just like Hannity’s recent call for Obama’s college transcripts so that he can search them for signs of “radicalism” or Huckabee’s demand to see if Obama received financial aid as a “foreign” student, they really can’t wrap their heads around the idea that Obama is what he is: A pragmatic moderate. They’ll never give up this caricature they’ve built up in their minds that Obama is some kind of frothing at the mouth black power radical, no matter how it jars against reality.

    I find I can only laugh now as republicans continue to push this meme even as Obama continues to implement ideas that republicans endorsed just 5-10 years ago.

  • eric

    (P.s. Normally one uses a grinding stone to sharpen metal. It’s a lot more effective.)

    I was curious about her phrase, so I googled. Its a biblical reference to Proverbs 27:17. KJV version: “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.”

    So chalk one up for Sarah, she actually used an apt analogy this time around. Making the score 1 to [large]

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  • Doug Little

    Iron sharpeneth iron

    I would have thought that they would have used a whetstone to sharpen iron back in biblical times. It seems that rasps were used by the Assyrians and Egyptians well before the bible was written but they would have had to have been able to case harden the iron for it to be effective at removing material from the iron implement they were sharpening, they probably used the rasps to shape wood instead.

  • bahrfeldt

    “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.” ? Rearranging the other guy’s face? Some friend.

  • slc1

    Re Michael Heath @ #9

    But according to the blog’s self appointed expert on all things biblical, Prof. David Heddle, Mr. Sullivan is guilty of continually bringing up the subject of Ms. Palin’s youngest daughter when everybody else has passed on it as he continually compares that to the birthers.

  • frog

    eric @ 11:

    Well of course she threw McCain under the bus. McCain dared to try to claim the spotlight from her when she was running for vice president!

  • http://killedbyfish.blogspot.com feralboy12

    Newt came out just like South Carolina’s own Smokin’ Joe Frazier.

    For those who don’t know boxing history, Joe Frazier defeated Muhammed Ali in their first fight in 1971, after which both fighters spent some time in the hospital. Frazier was there for a couple of weeks if memory serves; there were rumors that he had died.

    Yet another wonderful analogy from Ms. Palin.

    Killed By Fish

  • eric

    I would have thought that they would have used a whetstone to sharpen iron back in biblical times.

    They probably did. Thus, the book title “Proverbs.”

  • jolo5309

    “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.” ? Rearranging the other guy’s face? Some friend.

    It refers to 2 men rubbing each other’s faces.

  • stace

    It refers to 2 men rubbing each other’s faces.

    Hmmm, thought that sort of behavior was frowned upon in the Bible.

  • snafu

    At what point does irony cease to be ironic? I think we have reached that point.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=837416691 gregledbetter

    I use a steel to sharpen by chef’s nice every day. They are quite common.

    http://is.gd/XK0C59

  • Doug Little

    I use a steel to sharpen by chef’s nice every day. They are quite common.

    As a general rule a steel doesn’t actually sharpen the knife it straightens and smooths the edge conditioning it. As you use the knife the edge tends to roll over, to a certain extent which dulls it.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=837416691 gregledbetter

    Doug Little. Interesting, It sure improves how well the blade cuts however it does it. Not to change the subject!

  • Zinc Avenger

    But what do you sharpen stupidity with? Answer me that!

  • Doug Little

    But what do you sharpen stupidity with? Answer me that!

    The bible!

  • organon

    @#16

    dcwilson, that is truly impressive. I would like to quote it elsewhere, but I wanted to first check whether you would be OK with it. If so, would it be OK to credit it to dcwilson, or would something other be preferred? Either way, great job.

  • Michael Heath

    feralboy 12:

    For those who don’t know boxing history, Joe Frazier defeated Muhammed Ali in their first fight in 1971, after which both fighters spent some time in the hospital. Frazier was there for a couple of weeks if memory serves; there were rumors that he had died.

    While Joe Frazier did beat Muhammad Ali in their first fight, The Fight of the Century, it was the third fight in 1975 which had Frazier in the hospital where he felt like he was dying. He also did some stints in the hospital after the 1st fight but didn’t perceive he was near death then as he did after their fight in Manilla. That third fight was aptly named the Thrilla in Manila, which Ali won by TKO. There is a great book, Ghosts of Manila which covers this epic fight.

    While Ali lost the first fight, his toughness in that fight solidified he was far more than a fast pretty-boy; he was also one of the toughest fighters ever to enter the ring, especially when it came to taking punishment.

  • exdrone

    Another thing that sharpens steel is a leather strop. It’s limp and beaten. What’s her point again?

  • Tony

    Doug Little:

    The irony was so strong on this one that it arced to my unprotected meter and still blew the thing sky high.

    -Thou speakest truthfully!

    I’m not sure how I was able to facepalm after my head exploded from the inactive irony meter being activated uncontrollably. I’m starting to wonder exactly what occupation Sarah Palin is qualified for.

  • Ichthyic

    Palin keeps using that term “vetting” because she thinks…

    using two syllable words makes her look like an intellectual.

  • d cwilson

    organon:

    Feel free to quote it far and wide.

  • matty1

    Palin keeps using that term “vetting” because she thinks

    I reject your premise.

  • organon

    d cwilson, Thanks!

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