Santorum vs. Satan

You might think that Rick Santorum is running against Mitt Romney and Newt Gingrich, but he’s not. As he explained to students at Tom Monaghan’s Ave Maria University, he’s battling against Satan himself, who is destroying every American institution.

This is not a political war at all. This is not a cultural war. This is a spiritual war. And the Father of Lies has his sights on what you would think the Father of Lies would have his sights on: a good, decent, powerful, influential country – the United States of America. If you were Satan, who would you attack in this day and age. There is no one else to go after other than the United States and that has been the case now for almost two hundred years, once America’s preeminence was sown by our great Founding Fathers.

He didn’t have much success in the early days. Our foundation was very strong, in fact, is very strong. But over time, that great, acidic quality of time corrodes even the strongest foundations. And Satan has done so by attacking the great institutions of America, using those great vices of pride, vanity, and sensuality as the root to attack all of the strong plants that has so deeply rooted in the American tradition.

He was successful. He attacks all of us and he attacks all of our institutions. The place where he was, in my mind, the most successful and first successful was in academia. He understood pride of smart people. He attacked them at their weakest, that they were, in fact, smarter than everybody else and could come up with something new and different. Pursue new truths, deny the existence of truth, play with it because they’re smart. And so academia, a long time ago, fell.

And you say “what could be the impact of academia falling?” Well, I would have the argument that the other structures that I’m going to talk about here had root of their destruction because of academia. Because what academia does is educate the elites in our society, educates the leaders in our society, particularly at the college level. And they were the first to fall.

And so what we saw this domino effect, once the colleges fell and those who were being education in our institutions, the next was the church. Now you’d say, ‘wait, the Catholic Church’? No. We all know that this country was founded on a Judeo-Christian ethic but the Judeo-Christian ethic was a Protestant Judeo-Christian ethic, sure the Catholics had some influence, but this was a Protestant country and the Protestant ethic, mainstream, mainline Protestantism, and of course we look at the shape of mainline Protestantism in this country and it is in shambles, it is gone from the world of Christianity as I see it. So they attacked mainline Protestantism, they attacked the Church, and what better way to go after smart people who also believe they’re pious to use both vanity and pride to also go after the Church.

After that, you start destroying the Church and you start destroying academia, the culture is where their next success was and I need not even go into the state of the popular culture today. Whether its sensuality of vanity of the famous in America, they are peacocks on display and they have taken their poor behavior and made it fashionable. The corruption of culture, the corruption of manners, the corruption of decency is now on display whether it’s the NBA or whether it’s a rock concert or whether it’s on a movie set.

The fourth, and this was harder, now I know you’re going to challenge me on this one, but politics and government was the next to fall. You say, ‘you would think they would be the first to fall, as fallible as we are in politics,’ but people in political life get elected by ordinary folks from lots of places all over the country where the foundations of this country are still strong. So while we may certainly have had examples, the body politic held up fairly well up until the last couple of decades, but it is falling too.

httpv://youtu.be/n4jopm7hYFk

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • StevoR

    Yeah, I’d be voting Satan over “stinkyfrothymix” santorum anyday! 😉

  • williamsnedden

    That is absolutely bats*** f***ing insane.

  • shadowwalkyr

    pride, vanity, and sensuality

    Isn’t that the Republican motto these days?

  • Mr Ed

    Reason number one to vote for Satan. While he maybe the father of lies, prince of darkness, the adversary and the Antichrist he isn’t Rick Santorum who would make policy base on his paranoia of the bogyman.

  • Taz

    What a fucking jackass. When millions of people were slaves our moral foundation was strong. But now that NBA players and gays are all uppity, Satan is winning.

  • Larry

    If there were such a creature, I’m positive it would be far less annoying than Mr. Frothy has proven to be. This guy truly needs to live in the dark ages when everyone believed in demons. I can’t recall any politician being quite so god-soaked and so absolutely sure his religion must be applied to everyone.

  • dali70

    Doesn’t Rick know the secret weapon against the devil is tin foil? Well I hope he figures it out soon and starts wrapping it around his head. We wouldn’t want that pesky old mean devil getting into good ol’ Ricks noggin and start making him sound all crazy. Maybe he should start speaking in tongues during his campaign, or have an exorcism performed on himself, so we all know he’s not under the influence of of the devil. That should help his campaign show the rest of America, just who Rick Santorum is and what he’ll do for us as a nation. 😉

  • MikeMa

    Santorum may be fighting some inner demon rather than a real external enemy. The froth he spouts is so far over the edge he looks like Wiley Coyote before gravity kicks in.

  • DaveL

    We all know that this country was founded on a Judeo-Christian ethic but the Judeo-Christian ethic was a Protestant Judeo-Christian ethic

    This is the reduction ad absurdum of the “Judeo-Christian” farce. Are we to suppose that a “Protestant” Judeo-Christian ethic is shared by Protestant Jews but not Catholic Jews?

  • Chiroptera

    What the fuck happened to the Catholic Church?

    I mean, yeah, superstitious nonsense and all, but aren’t the stands the Church is taking these days a Great Leap Backward from where they seemed to be heading in the ’60s and ’70s?

    Do they really hate gays and women’s health care so much that they need to burrow into the crazy in order to make alliances with the other anti-gay, anti-women crazies?

  • slc1

    What is most frightening here is that this sort of crap is not being covered in the lame stream media, nor is Santorum ever questioned about it when he appears on mainstream interview programs. The notion that this whackjob could conceivably be elected president in November harkens back to Germany in 1932. The folks maintaining that Santorum couldn’t possibly be elected president are all to reminiscent of the Germans who wrote off Frankenberger as a deluded nutcase.

    What is even more frightening is the reaction of foreign leaders who surely must be informed by their intelligence officials about the possibility of President Santorum. Even the mad mullahs running Iran sound more sane then this nutcase.

  • Blondin

    Rick Santorum reminds me of Cliff Robertson’s character in the cheesy sf flick “Escape from L.A.”.

    Where’s Snake Plissken when we need him?

  • Michael Heath

    One reason this video is being distributed around the country is to point out Santorum’s Christianism is not a 2012 concoction but in fact he’s a long-time demagogue. I’m a bit surprised some people are arguing he used to demonstrate honesty and character in the past, today’s Santorum is the same Santorum I’ve always encountered.

  • http://rockstarramblings.blogspot.com/ Bronze Dog

    I’m finding this Satan talk a bit funnier than usual today. I’m not exactly sure which component is tickling my funny bone. On one hand, fundie Christians seem to have gone out of their way to make their god more evil than Satan, so of course we’d be more likely to vote Satan. On the other hand, the popular depiction of Satan has little or no basis in scripture, which implies (with no surprise) the Satan-obsessed Christians haven’t studied the Bible.

    I find the mention of politeness funny for its naivete. Politeness, as fundies use it, is a longstanding enemy of truth and justice. Whenever someone tells an uncomfortable truth, it’s “impolite.” Whenever someone demands to be treated as an equal under the law, it’s “impolite.”

    It’s also amusing because it reminds me of a scene I saw in a commercial for 3rd Rock From the Sun. One of the aliens had become obsessed with becoming “evil.” The rest of the cast tell him that he’s already evil, pointing out that he doesn’t wash his hands, leaves the cap off the toothpaste, and so forth. He responds, “That’s not evil, that’s inconsiderate.”

  • slc1

    Re Michael Heath @ #13

    But, AFAIK, this isn’t being covered in the lamestream media, who, once again, are falling down on the job. This is scary stuff.

  • slc1

    Re Bronze Dog @ #14

    There is nothing funny about this crap coming from a potential POTUS. IMHO, it’s about as humorous as AIDS.

  • peterh

    Even now Obama is licking his chops. And that’s not really a good thing, either.

  • Yoritomo

    Santorum’s view of academia is revealing. Its purpose is not to “come up with something new” or “pursue new truths”, ie do research, oh no. Its purpose is to “educate the elites”. I read that as “teach dogma”.

    The “great vices of pride, vanity, and sensuality” made me wonder: Is belief in American exceptionalism a tool of Satan? I’m almost ready to believe that…

  • RickR

    Here in Arizona, I’ve been seeing an anti-Santorum ad put up out by Romney’s SuperPAC “Restore Our Future”-

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Restore_Our_Future

    The ad attacks Santorum’s voting record, painting him as a Big Government™, fiscally irresponsible RINO who’s too liberal (he voted with HILLARY CLINTON to extend voting rights to ex-felons!!!11!)

    Not a peep about the fact that Santorum is a religious fuckwit who has wet dreams about the dark ages.

    But I suppose if you’re a Mormon, the last thing you want to do is play the “religious whackjob” card against your opponent.

  • The Lorax

    Go Santorum Go! Dig that hole deeper! Next rally you go to, carry a wooden cross on your back and a crown of thorns on your brow!

    Seriously though. You know in the Roadrunner cartoons when Wile E. Coyote would fall off the cliff, and there would be this looooooong whistle before the tiny “pomf” when he hit the ground? Santorum is currently in that long whistle phase. He’s just lucky it’s lasting as long as it is. And so is John Stewart.

  • dingojack

    SLC – Yeah I’d be wetting myself.

    Which horse would you back?

    A at 592 to 7, or B at 4 to 1 (or C at 2 to 3)?

    Hmmm… Hard choice.

    Dingo

    —–

    A = Santorum; B = Romney (C = Obama)

  • fastlane

    Just as every cop is a criminal

    And all the sinners saints

    As heads is tails just call me Lucifer

    I’m in need of some restraint

    So if you meet me, have some courtesy

    Have some sympathy and some taste

    Use all your well learned politics

    Or I’ll lay your soul to waste.

  • Pteryxx

    Thanks to Libby Anne, I can’t find this crap funny anymore.

    from Libby Anne:

    This link has some info. It says 40% of Americans believe that Jesus will return before 2050.

    Comment link

    Remember that when we’re joking about how nobody would vote for Rick Satan’s-in-all-your-institutions Santorum.

  • slc1

    Re Dingojack @ #21

    I wonder what the Intrade take on Frankenberger would have been if it existed in Germany in 1932?

  • dingojack

    SLC –

    In July about 3 to 8 (13,745,680 or 37.27%).

    In November about 3 to 1 (11,737,021 or 33.09%).*

    Dingo

    —–

    * Any other fool questions before your go back to cowering under your bed?

  • d cwilson

    He understood pride of smart people.

    Anyone who thinks Santorum’s views are a serious aberration from the mainstream of modern republican “thought” needs to take a closer look at this dogwhistle. Maybe he cranks the Jeebus Jumpin’ and anti-intellectualism up to 11, but he’s playing to the base as it stands today. Smart people are bad. Academics are bad. People who spend their time doing research and studying data are bad. Evidence-based conclusions are bad because they contradict with their received wisdom and dogma.

    This is the heart of the republican belief system. Rather than adjust their thinking to fit the evidence, their response is to attack the people who present it to them. This is what Santorum means when he accuses them of trying “create something new”. That’s bad. We’re supposed to just accept their dogma as fact without question, even if it carries us over the cliff.

    We see this kind of thinking across the board, evolution, global warming, etc. Whether they don’t like the conclusions, the conservative response is always to attack the messenger. Global warming is a fraud because Al Gore is fat. Evolution is a fraud because Hitler!

    And it’s just in science and religion. Economists warned that the austerity programs in Europe would make things worse and they did. But do you think the failure of austerity in Greece and Spain will lead conservatives to finally admit that supply-side economics is all voodoo? Not a chance.

  • KG

    The notion that this whackjob could conceivably be elected president in November harkens back to Germany in 1932. – slc1

    Indeed, he might be such an evil, disgusting, vile and inhuman whackjob that he’d launch a campaign of genocide, as Hitler did! Like, for instance, genocide against the people of Iran, using half a dozen 15 megaton bombs!

  • raven

    Santorum:

    mainstream, mainline Protestantism, and of course we look at the shape of mainline Protestantism in this country and it is in shambles, it is gone from the world of Christianity as I see it. So they attacked mainline Protestantism,

    The key point in Santorum’s nearly incoherent god babble is where he declares that mainline Protestants were attacked by satan and are now a “shambles” and “gone from xianity” presumably because satan won.

    If I was still a mainline Protestant, I would be rather insulted at being called “gone from xianity” and a “shambles”. Especially by a Catholic. It’s not like the church of child rapers led by weird old men has been able to claim the moral high ground in the last 2,000 years.

    The reaction to this from the mainliners has been predictable. Nothing. Not even the Lutherans who bore much of the fighting during the Reformation wars and some Lutheran subsects (WELS)still claim the Pope is the Antichrist.

    The mainliners have been attacked all right. By the Sandman and they seem to spend a lot of time in a coma.

  • eric

    We all know that this country was founded on a Judeo-Christian ethic but the Judeo-Christian ethic was a Protestant Judeo-Christian ethic

    We cannot forget the importance of our founding protestent jews!

    If you were Satan, who would you attack in this day and age.

    Financial regulations. Constitutional protections for minorities. The EPA, environmental, and land and water use regulations. Judicial independence. The Geneva Convention’s rules against torture. I’d also attack any attempt to reduce military funding.

  • raven

    This guy truly needs to live in the dark ages when everyone believed in demons.

    I’m sure that Santorum believes in demons and demonic possession. He follows official Catholic dogma closely, the version from the Dark Ages and much of his god babble is taken straight from Thomas Aquinas.

    The RCC is proud to offer exorcisms and recently increased their staff of priest anti-demon magicians.

    He also probably believes in witches, witchcraft and anything else that was common in the Dark Ages.

    Santorum is a broken human with a warped personality who has no business being president.

    PS If you read his long lists of hates, it includes amniocentesis. In his theocratic hellhole, why not, no one but his wife is getting an abortion.

  • Trebuchet

    I’m surprised nobody else has pointed out the oddity of Santorum citing the domino effect at a “university” paid for by the founder of Domino’s Pizza. What an idiot. (Santorum or Monaghan, take your pick.)

  • http://dododreams.blogspot.com/ John Pieret

    That sound you hear is the entire Republican Party establishment slitting their wrists.

  • raven42

    If *I* were the Father of Lies, I really wouldn’t change a thing about America. I’d rather live here than most other countries personally, but in terms of causing human suffering through war and commerce we’re hard to beat. Any god who’s actually worthy of worship would be pretty damn mad at this country, for reasons that have absolutely nothing to do with Santorum’s whining.

  • slc1

    Re KG @ #27

    Better them then us.

  • slc1

    Re Dingo the bingo @ #25

    I assume that Dingo the bingo is referring to election results. It’s always effortless to be wise after the fact (known as Monday morning quarterbacking in the US). In the present case, neither the Rethuglican convention or the election have been held yet so the Intrade running results are just the opinions of thousands or millions of people. With such an opinion plus $1.50, one can ride the Washington Metrorail for 3 miles in the off peak.

  • =8)-DX

    Yes, the root of the US’s problems is all the clever, educated people who enjoy sex, don’t worry too much about religion and try to have a modern, informed and constructive influence on politics.

    I would rather be counted in that group than any other, whatever country I was in.

  • Freeman

    slc1 #34 sez:

    Better them then us.

    I assume you meant better them than us, because the way you said it was even dumber than your usual juvenile ranting.

    The fact that the U.S. has only had the nerve to use nuclear weapons when we were the only ones that had them should tell you something. Ironically, the way you said it is the most likely eventual outcome of a nuclear first-strike — them, then us.

  • http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Quoted for irony:

    “The fourth, and this was harder, now I know you’re going to challenge me on this one, but politics and government was the next to fall…the body politic held up fairly well up until the last couple of decades, but it is falling too.” ~ Rick “K Street Project Liaison” Santorum, US House of Representatives 1991-1995, US Senator 1995-2007

    d cwilson “And it’s just in science and religion. Economists warned that the austerity programs in Europe would make things worse and they did. But do you think the failure of austerity in Greece and Spain will lead conservatives to finally admit that supply-side economics is all voodoo? Not a chance.”

    The austerity programs are doing fine. It’s Contractionary Growth® (“Contractionary Growth” registered trademark of The Heritage Free Market Liberty America Institute).

    slc1 “Better them then us.”

    [says slc1, masturbating furiously]

  • baal

    Wouldn’t Satan go for some easier places first? Like maybe a France or Pulau-Pulau? Why try to shoot-the-moon?

  • http://rockstarramblings.blogspot.com/ Bronze Dog

    Okay, the humor I had earlier in the thread has worn off. Back to political depression mode. I really hope this whole fiasco of the 2012 election will end up creating a powerful backlash against insanity like this.

  • slc1

    Re Freeman @ #37

    To paraphrase Nikita Khrushchev, my hand would not tremble when giving the order to nuke Iran.

  • Scott Hanley

    the body politic held up fairly well up until the last couple of decades, but it is falling too.

    Which matches up neatly with the rise of the religious right. Coincidence?

    I noticed quite some years back that the Santorum-style conservative lack a distinction between “education” and “indoctrination.” They can’t understand the difference, even in principle. Instead, they assume every academic approaches education they way they do and can’t imagine a teacher that doesn’t demand a slavish recitation of dogma. Not to give academics too much credit, as they’re as fond of flattering imitation as anyone. But I’ve met few who couldn’t at least put on a good display of appreciating thoughtful disagreement, or who wouldn’t be disappointed in a student who could do no more than recite rote dogma like Bible verses.

  • D. C. Sessions

    Do they really hate gays and women’s health care so much that they need to burrow into the crazy in order to make alliances with the other anti-gay, anti-women crazies?

    A key to this is the timing: they didn’t make an issue of all those “Catholic” institutions offering their employees health care including for the past 25+ years, and suddenly it becomes the bedrock issue of Catholic faith.

    The bishops’ “own” membership are pretty much ignoring them and they’re slipping into total irrelevance. They appear to have made the strategic decision that the only way at least slow the slide is to join forces with others intent on imposing Christian rule on an unwilling populace.

    There are more important things, after all, than doctrinal details.

  • Crudely Wrott

    Having read Santorum’s quoted statement fully, twice, I cannot find two consecutive, coherent statements anywhere in it.

    His oratory sucks big time, too. I just can’t imagine being able to sit in a room with him and listen to him for more than about a minute before I’d head for the coat room.

    *Mine’s the one with the noise-cancelling headphones in the pocket.*

  • Ace of Sevens

    The things he says about mainline protestants are pretty much the same things conservative Catholics and your crazier evangelicals say about mainstream Catholics.

  • dingojack

    SLC – can you order a nuclear strike whilst cowering under your bed?

    Better get your favorite security blanket SLC, it’s gonna get cold and dry under there for the next 3-5 years. It’s called nuclear winter and drought. Even a small-scale nuclear wars can cause them.

    But you knew that.

    Dingo

  • dan4

    What’s with the bizarre lack of self-awareness of making a generalized attack against “academia”…at a COLLEGE?!

  • http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    dan4, Ave Maria U is one of the good schools. Unlike those liberal ones which indoctrinate kids to hate everything that is good and holy, AMU merely indoctrinates them to love everything that is good and holy.

    The “Tom Monaghan” mention is a clue. He’s the kook behind the town of Ave Maria, Florida, too.

  • slc1

    Re Dingo the bingo @ #46

    A half dozen 15 megaton bombs wouldn’t come close to causing nuclear winter. Compared to a volcano eruption, they would barely add up to a small perturbation. In order to cause a nuclear winter, it would require the setting off of several hundred such bombs well spread out around the world.

  • stace

    Santorum getting elected President: It can’t happen here… can it?

  • dingojack

    So called SLC – Hmm you seemed have scaled back on your usual genocidal self. Isn’t 5 or 6 15 Kt bombs the normal SLC masturbatory fantasy?

    What, only time for quickie?

    Dingo

  • slc1

    Re Dingo the bingo @ #51

    Since a half dozen such bombs will do the job, any additional ones constitute overkill and a waste of resources.

  • http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    slc1, obviously. Dingojack is being ridiculous. One has to be rational about these things.

  • http://euroatheist.wordpress.com pelamun

    slc1,

    is not only a genocidal maniac but can’t get their German history right either. Why am I not surprised…

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