With Michele Bachmann announcing that she won’t run for reelection — which totally has nothing to do with the multiple criminal investigations into her presidential campaign, she assures us — the wingnuts are rushing to pen love letters to her brilliance and honesty and integrity. Doug Patton puts on his deceit-colored glasses and does his best:
The prophet Isaiah wrote, “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!” (Isaiah 5:20, KJV) Sixteenth century theologian Martin Luther once said, “Send your good men into the clergy, but send your best men into politics.” Taken together, these two powerful quotes speak volumes to our day and age…
Sadly, one of our best and brightest, U.S. Rep. Michele Bachmann, R-MN, has chosen not to seek a fifth term in Congress. A petite and beautiful happy warrior for truth, justice and the Constitution, Bachmann virtually defied political gravity when she was first elected in 2006 — the same year voters repudiated the George W. Bush-led GOP and gave Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid control of both the House and the Senate.
Okay, how about “woe unto them who call stupid smart and crazy sane?
Wow, really? Catapulted her to victory in the Iowa straw poll? That’s about as impressive as someone trying to win the Indy 500 beating the other drivers to the drive thru at McDonald’s before the race. She won the irrelevant straw poll and then got a measly 5% in the actual Iowa Caucuses a few months later and dropped out of the race. And by the way, Bachmann announced her candidacy months before Sarah Palin announced she wasn’t going to run for president.
But then Bachmann sought to do what no one since the 19th century has pulled off: go directly from the United States House of Representatives to the Presidency. She picked up the mantle when it became obvious that her friend, Sarah Palin, was not going to run, and waged an aggressive, take no prisoners campaign that catapulted her to victory in the narrowly defined Iowa Republican Straw Poll in August of 2011.
Within weeks, however, the media began to highlight her foibles and eccentricities, crucifying her for petty mistakes that paled in contrast to the gigantic failures of their golden boy. In effect, they did to her what they have done to every conservative from Robert Bork and Clarence Thomas to Rick Santorum and Herman Cain. They hated them and so they destroyed them, and Bachmann was no exception.
Or…she kept saying one stupid and crazy thing after another, like claiming that vaccinations caused mental retardation, that Obama was going to force all young Americans into reeducation camps and the like, until people realized she was a first class nutball.