Wiles: Miley Cyrus Has Sex With Satan. Plus, the Illuminati.

Rick Wiles had Joe Schimmel of something called Good Fight Ministries on his radio show recently and they spent some time discussing the recent behavior of Miley Cyrus. Turns out she isn’t just a mediocre talent trying to get rich and famous with outrageous behavior, she’s made a “deal with Lucifer.”

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Oh, and she’s been “baptized into the Illuminati” and is teaching people how to have sex with Satan.

[soundcloud url=”https://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/117989534″ params=”show_artwork=false” width=”100%” height=”166″ iframe=”true” /]

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  • matty1

    Well at least we know what Mr Schimmel thinks about when he shakes hands with the unemployed.

  • chilidog99

    Rick and Joe are just jealous because Satan has a bigger wang than they do.

  • http://www.facebook.com/teve.tory Teve Tory

    I’ve read several interviews with her. She’s smarter than Rick Wiles and Joe Schimmel combined.

  • blf

    How does Joe know? Was he there?

  • Dave Maier

    Wait, you used the word “talent” in the same sentence as [a pronoun referring to] Miley Cyrus. Syntax error, Ed, please be more careful in future. Thank you.

  • dingojack

    Teve Tory – talk about damning with faint praise!

    :) Dingo

  • John Pieret

    Miley Cyrus is “talented”? Okay, we know they are cluless to begin with.ber

    As a card carrying member of the Illuminati, I think we should sue for defamation because of their false factual claim that she is one of us!

    And there is the Attenborough version:

    http://vimeo.com/77785214

  • Randomfactor

    Satan has a bigger wang

    And only one ball, but it’s ENORMOUS.

  • anubisprime

    made a “deal with Lucifer.”

    ‘I went down to the crossroad, fell down on my knees’

  • dingojack

    anubisprime – just like the son of Queen Liz the First’s favourite lutenist no doubt*.

    Dingo

    ———-

    * John Johnson’s son – Robert. :)

  • Taz

    Turns out she isn’t just a mediocre talent trying to get rich and famous with outrageous behavior

    I hate to break it to you, but Miley Cyrus is rich and famous.

  • John Pieret

    I hate to break it to you, but Miley Cyrus is rich and famous.

    So was Dagmar.

    If you are young enough to go ‘who’? … that is the point!

  • caseloweraz

    Turns out she isn’t just a mediocre talent trying to get rich and famous with outrageous behavior, she’s made a “deal with Lucifer.”

    I make the obvious response:

    http://www.discogs.com/label/Lucifer%20Records

    “Hardcore, Gabber, Speedcore label”

  • grumpyoldfart

    I can imagine the two of them having a bet with each other about who would be game enough to make the most ridiculous claim against Miley Cyrus during the program.

    Sitting around the dinner table with their families after work, they probably laugh and laugh and laugh – and marvel at the hillbilly mentality of the audience that listens to their diatribes and agrees with every word they say.

  • Mr Ed

    The last musical act to make a deal with the devil was Led Zeppelin, not John Paul Jones but the rest did. So I’m looking forward to Miley’s next album, hope it is as good as Physical Graffiti.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000263140906 Donovan

    I think I want to go get some of this mind blowing sex that Wiles advertises will turn a Disney virgin into a phallic obsessed harlot. The same “rock your socks off” kind of demon sex that probably gave Hendrix and Joplin their talent, too. Sounds like Heaven to me. Is he sure he’s worshiping the right side of this God/Satan thing?

  • Taz
    I hate to break it to you, but Miley Cyrus is rich and famous.

    So was Dagmar.

    Famous maybe. I don’t know about rich. Cyrus’ net worth is estimated at well over $100 million. Which was my point, she doesn’t have to try to get rich and famous, she’s already there. So why the antics? Who knows. Maybe she’s desperate for attention. Maybe she’s just fucking with everyone.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Taz “So why the antics? Who knows. Maybe she’s desperate for attention. Maybe she’s just fucking with everyone.”

    With some exceptions (Opie!), child star + time = adult rebellion.

    And I should know. I was 2001’s Giant Space Baby. I did the same thing at the MTV awards when I was twenty, and parents of the day were shocked and disgusted then, too. Disgusted, mostly.

  • Ben P

    I can’t believe I’m about to praise Miley Cyrus, but even though you can’t see it in her “pop” acts, she’s got some talent. If there weren’t far more money in being a public spectacle, she could be a decent folk/country singer.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wOwblaKmyVw

  • Ex Patriot

    I have to agree after watching the video that she has talent and would do well in the country field and quit the silliness. I wouldn’t mind trading places with Satan if what the wingnut loonies say is true. The wingnut zombies need to get a life in the real world

  • http://polrant@blogspot.com democommie

    If those two KKKristianidiots thought that they could get their hands on Miley and her money by having sex with Satan they’d have a gallon of Astroglide(TM) sittin’ on their nightstand.

    Miley has a generically good voice. There’s a fuckton of women out there who sing just as well, I’ve seen a number of them singing with bar bands up here in central NY.

    She has a leg up on most of them, thanks to her daddy, Disney and the $’s she’s proven to be able to earn. It could be that she wants to do something a lot edgier and that could be difficult to get a major label to sign off–pure speculation on my part, btw.

    I just realized that Nashville has completely missed the boat on genera diversity. They pretty much quit making what I recognize as country music, a long time ago. Most of what comes out of there now is Nashville Pop. It might be interesting to see what they could do with Countrymetal, Countrygrunge, Countrytechno and all of the other subgenres that rock has been bastardized with.

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    As for Miley’s talent, well, she’s a lot more pleasant to listen to than Lil’ Wayne. Not that you need to make a deal with Satan to clear that low bar.

    As for “teaching people how to have sex with Satan,” I really don’t think Satan needs a lot of tenderness and understanding. From the gossip I’ve heard, he pretty much takes the lead right from the start. But then again, the “South Park” guys say he’s not that tough in bed, and they’re about as reliable a source on Satan as anyone else I’ve heard; so maybe Miley is on to something here. Maybe she understands he’s still hurting from his breakup with Saddam Hussein…?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1092933945 mikegarber

    (as seen of facebook): “When Miley Cyrus licks a hammer, its called art; when I do it they call it “wasted” and ask me to leave the Home Depot”.

  • Trebuchet

    Claims that Cyrus is possessed by demons and sleeps with Satan sound legally actionable to me. Probably not worth her time to file suit, of course.

  • dingojack

    Wiles: Miley Cyrus Has Sex With Satan. Plus, the Illuminati.

    At the same time?!?* Where does she get the energy?

    Dingo

    ——–

    *And these are the people who think two men having a loving relationship with each other is icky!

  • Friendly

    I think I’ve mentioned this a couple of times before, but one of the most jaw-droppingly stupid claims ever made at one of the morning assemblies at our Christian academy was by a “rock ‘n’ roll expert” guest speaker who breathlessly asserted that Debbie Boone had sung “You Light Up My Life” to Satan.

  • Thumper; Immorally Inferior Sergeant Major in the Grand Gynarchy Mangina Corps (GGMC)

    “…if you look at the beginning of the VMA video which is absolutely, er, disgusting, really…”

    Yeah. OK. You can hear him salivating.

  • Thumper; Immorally Inferior Sergeant Major in the Grand Gynarchy Mangina Corps (GGMC)

    @Ben P

    Her dad did country, didn’t he? Or did I make that up?

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