Lively Officially Launches Gubernatorial Campaign

The deranged anti-gay bigot Scott Lively has officially launched his absolutely pointless campaign for governor of Massachusetts. He’s running as an independent. As unhitched to reality as he always is, I find it hard to imagine that he’s delusional enough to think he has any chance of winning.

The anti-homosexuality, pro-life evangelist, who is currently being sued by a Ugandan civil rights group for crimes against humanity, has announced he’s running for governor. Some of his platforms are predictable, given his previous public statements: stop public funding for abortion; repeal gay marriage and help homosexuals “repent;” and protect Second Amendment rights.

Lively, a lawyer who founded Abiding Truth Ministries in California, also has a few unexpected platforms, including protecting honey bees, according to his campaign literature.

His campaign motto is “Qualified. Experienced. Electable.” Publicly available campaign finance records show he has about $3,000 in his coffers, including a $2,000 loan to himself…

Lively is running as an independent in the “bluest of the blue states,” he said. He said he will be a viable option for conservatives whom, he said, have been abandoned by Republicans and have no connection with Democrats, to whom he refers as “Communists.”

“The people of Massachusetts need a candidate who can clearly and unapologetically articulate Biblical values without fear or compromise,” his campaign literature states. “They need a candidate who will tell the simple truth that abortion is murder, and homosexuality is condemned by God (but that Jesus forgives those who repent).”

I wonder if I can find one of his advisers to make a big bet with me that he’s going to win like I did with Herman Cain. I have as much of a chance of being the next governor of Massachusetts as he does and I don’t even live there.

POPULAR AT PATHEOS Nonreligious
What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • http://www.gregory-gadow.net Gregory in Seattle

    “Qualified. Experienced. Electable.”

    He should be blocked from ballot access, just for such egregious lies.

  • MikeMa

    He’d have a much better chance in Alabama. I suspect many MA residents would like him to consider that option.

  • Loqi

    It’s entirely appropriate for him to run as an independent, since he’ll be the lone person checking the box next to his name on a ballot.

  • http://rhapsodies.wpmorse.com/ montanto

    “The people of Massachusetts need a candidate who can clearly and unapologetically articulate Biblical values without fear or compromise,”

    Why, in case someone has a trivia contest?

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Lively, a lawyer who founded Abiding Truth Ministries in California, also has a few unexpected platforms, including protecting honey bees, according to his campaign literature.

    He does know that bees live in a gyno-centric Matriarchy, right?

  • cgm3

    Is he also going to rescue the good people of Massachusetts from the liberal-progressive-socialist tyranny of Romneycare?

  • Nick Gotts

    He does know that bees live in a gyno-centric Matriarchy, right? – Modusoperandi

    Worse, it’s actually a misandrist workers’ republic! Research shows that the ratio of males (drones) to females (workers) raised corresponds to the genetic interests of the workers, not the queen – the haplodiploid reporductive system, where males have only one set of chromosomes while females have two, means that workers have less genetically in common with their brothers or their mother than with each other, or than the queen has in common with her sons. Surplus males are killed off in infancy, and males have neither fathers nor sons.

  • daved

    Well, at least it will be a Lively campaign season.

  • Sastra

    I wonder if any of those “I’m an atheist but I would never let that affect the way I vote” types will end up voting for Scott Lively strictly on the basis of the pro-honey bee issue.

  • jnorris

    The honey bee situation is a real problem. It is good that someone has brought it to the political arena. Unfortunately Mr Lively is too much of a goof ball to help. His endorsement may actually hurt the cause.

    I wish his PAC all the best of luck during the money collecting political campaign.

  • felidae

    “Democrats, to whom he refers as “Communists.”

    And people like Lively are what sane people refer to as “dickheads”

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    felidae “And people like Lively are what sane people refer to as ‘dickheads'”

    As a dickhead, I find it offensive that you lump him in with us. We have a bad enough image as it is (we know we’re dickheads!), there’s no need to smear us with the likes of him.

    Further actions like this on your part will put us in a legal strike position, and I don’t think anybody wants your business surrounded by a line of dickheads.

    Yours Truly,

    Brother Modusoperandi

    International Dickhead Union (Local #143)

  • Robert B.

    “Qualified. Experienced. Electable.”

    He should be blocked from ballot access, just for such egregious lies.

    If egregious lies were sufficient to make a candidate ineligible, we’d never elect anybody. Besides, I suspect “electable” is sheer self-delusion – he seems like the type to be surprised when he gets trounced.