Beck Calls Technology ‘Authoritarian Porn’

Glenn Beck went on a bizarre rant about technology, noting that the makers of the next Hunger Games movie plan to digitally recreate Philip Seymour Hoffman for a scene he didn’t finish before he died. That makes technology “authoritarian porn” and a sign of the impending fascism. Or something. See if you can make any sense out of this.

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  • zippythepinhead

    Beck’s confused. “Authoritarian porn” is the good kind of porn. It’s totalitarian porn that you have to watch out for.

  • tbp1

    I’ve actually given up trying to make sense out of Beck.

    There are people I disagree with whose arguments I can still follow, but with Beck it’s become impossible to even figure out what he’s trying to say. I literally cannot paraphrase most of his utterings to the point of being able to understand them.

  • dogmeat

    Wait a second, he is anti-capitalism???

  • alanb

    See if you can make any sense out of this.

    Nope. Wasn’t able to. Appears to be a couple scare words (“authoritarian” and “porn” ) added to some Ludditism, but beyond the fact that Becks gets off on scary words, the point escapes me.

  • anubisprime

    tbp1 @ 2

    I’ve actually given up trying to make sense out of Beck.

    I think…’therefore god’ is the jist in the scuppers of his argument.

    But it is quite easy to… not really care!

  • dingojack

    ‘Authoritarian porn’

    So that’s Mr Bek was doing at that late-night showing of the first movie. No wonder he was wearing that slightly sticky tan raincoat and carrying a bag of Twisties.

    😉 Dingo

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    He is right. Remember how Obama socialismed us when his Tupac hologram program was revealed? Or how Clinton authoritarianed us when he digitally, posthumously added Brandon Lee to The Crow? How much worse can things get?!?

  • Synfandel

    Or when they used a digital Oliver Reed for a few seconds in Gladiator?

  • Reginald Selkirk

    noting that the makers of the next Hunger Games movie plan to digitally recreate Philip Seymour Hoffman for a scene he didn’t finish before he died.

    Digital recreation, how ghastly! There is precedent for how to handle a situation like this.

    Plan 9 From Outer Space

    Yes. In fact, Bela Lugosi died of a heart attack on August 6, 1956 while filming of Plan 9 from Outer Space was still ongoing. Rather than refilm Lugosi’s footage as “the old man” or rewrite his parts that had yet to be filmed, Wood hired his wife’s chiropractor, Tom Mason, as a stand-in for Lugosi, even though Mason is taller, thinner, and considerably younger than Lugosi…

  • Reginald Selkirk

    There is some controversy on this point; some sources claim it was Wood’s wife’s dentist, not chiropractor.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    “Man on internet decries technology”

  • Albert Bakker

    Okay, I’m not a native speaker and so I always try to take into account that if I fail to make sense of stuff it might be the consequence of crafty or sophisticated linguistic jugglery flying right over my head. In this case however I really do suspect to have been the witness of a computer-generated Beck that was quite impressively lip-synced with a random word generator.

  • leskimopie

    Yeah, technology is increasingly taking over our lives and our jobs. Luckily because Beck is a good job creator, he hasn’t yet replaced his cameraman with an automated robot helicopter to fly around and get all those stupid sweeping camera angles that make up every single second of Glenn Beck’s videos.

  • tubi

    @9 and 10

    So will film schools now have to teach the controversy?

  • http://www.holytape.etsy.com holytape

    If you play it backwards you get.

    “Hitler. Hitler. Hit Hitler hitlering he hitlerly hitler.”

    How true, how very true.

  • Sastra

    I watched the thing and my best guess is that Beck is tapping in to the fears of the Industrial Revolution, that technology is going to take away jobs, dehumanize us, and make the human factor unnecessary. Soon people won’t be necessary any more and will be eliminated by robots created for the purpose.

    The weird thing is that this is the sort of Anti-Technology Porn popular among the Liberal Spiritual Back-to-Nature Hippie crowd. Must be a circle.

  • raven

    Well look at the bright side.

    Beck continually makes wild claims that never come true. A few years ago he was supposedly going blind, he is going to be persecuted, thrown in jail, and on and on.

    One day this will make a great book or at least a Youtube video. Glenn Beck, court jester or false prophet?

    PS The wonder isn’t that Beck is incoherent. The wonder is that some people follow him to the point where he has made a large fortune of ca. $100 million.

    Who are these people making him uber rich? I only know one and he is a very old man who is showing marked age related cognitive problems.

  • raven

    Beck seems to somewhat be losing his following. I really have little data on this so it is just an impression. I don’t see too many people referencing him except to laugh at him and even on lunatic fringe sites, there aren’t many.

    Makes sense. His whole message is, “the sky is falling and we are all going to die any minute.” IIRC, Henny Penny said the same thing long ago and it never happened then either.

  • mobius

    Making sense of Beck? You are expecting a lot there.

  • schism

    …but with Beck it’s become impossible to even figure out what he’s trying to say.

    Oh, that’s easy. All of Beck’s arguments really boil down to “PAY ATTENTION TO ME. ALL OF YOU. DO IT NOW.” I’m not sure how he maintains an audience with that kind of repetition, though.

  • Larry

    Food porn. Heard of it.

    Fish porn. Heard of it, too.

    Regular ol’ porn. Nope. Never seen it, never heard of it. And you can’t prove I watched Debbie Does Dallas fivefour times, anyway.

    But authoritarian porn. That’s a new one. Is it on Netflix yet?

  • lofgren

    normally I pride myself on being able to decipher these things, but in this case I’m just lost. Here are some themes I was able to pick out:

    1. Liberals/atheists believe that man is god – “There is no death.”

    2. Survivalism/doomsday prepping – “There’s less for us to do.” “We’re getting dumber.” “People aren’t preparing for it.”

    3. Progressives are the real fascists – “Live off us” General nanny state comments.

    I think the most interesting line is the one about the “military that drives itself, not a person in it.” While our inevitable robot overlords should strike fear into the ichorpump of any fleshysack, they must be particularly chilling to somebody like Beck. When you measure your worth by how masculine and patriotic you are, and consider military service to be the epitome of both, the day when your wife’s vibrator picks up a machine gun and combat boots is the stuff of nightmares.

  • lorn

    I think he is, on just about every subject, somewhere between wrong and burning stupid but the overall message is always the same. You can get the gist of the message if you understand CWA ( Conservative White American) racial panic. Beck is the purveyor of the purest CWA panic available to the general public. ( CWA panic … Now with recursive appreciation and self-referential regeneration … Brought to you by the makers of the original self-licking ice cream cone) Yes, you can find more extreme sources, and depending on your tolerance for random capitalization, scary-bad web-page designs, and an infinite supply of irony meters, they can be fun but Beck is the top-of-the-line for smooth, professionally produced, funhouse grade scary shit for thrill-seeking members of CWA.

    The messages are all about how the members of his audience are aliens in their own land. Territory they wake up to no longer feels like home, like the place it was, like the places they know and have loved. They don’t look like me, or think like me, or act like me. Everything they thought of as safe and homey, the whole made up story of Mayberry RFD, and Sergent York, and stand up white men who talked and shot straight is gone. The days of white boys getting through high-school and having free reign with the levers of power and wealth without having to compete with brown people, and girls, and eggheads is gone. It is scary out there now.

    So the message is that CWAs need to band together, arm themselves, get back to values that values the CWAs. Go back to before it all got complicated. When people knew their place. When actors were real men who counted and couldn’t be so easily replaced.

    Never mind that Cary Grant was Gay, John Wayne stayed well away from the fighting, and Philip Seymour Hoffman was a druggie … Never mind that reality was never what was presented to CWAs by Hollywood. Or that the illusion of a classless society where every white man can strike out on their own, make it with nothing but grit and determination and see their sons do better than they did was a momentary and one-time-only fluke of history and economic serendipity.

  • sh3baproject

    my mind just melted.

  • spamamander, internet amphibian

    I would think the plot of the third Hunger Games novel would make Beck’s brain explode anyway- a 16/17 year old girl becomes the face of a rebellion against the government? Out actively fighting against the 1%ers of the Capitol? Eventually seeing through the facade of the other dictator she was being used by and ushering in a democracy? Never mind a bit of digital magic…

  • eric

    my best guess is that Beck is tapping in to the fears of the Industrial Revolution, that technology is going to take away jobs, dehumanize us, and make the human factor unnecessary.

    Yeah, because creating a digital Hoffman probably only employs 3-4 people, instead of the one employed if we still had Hoffman. Idiot (him, not you).

  • oranje

    I thought authoritarian porn was on Court TV back in the day, and technology porn is the entire premise of G4.

  • kyoseki

    Yeah, because creating a digital Hoffman probably only employs 3-4 people, instead of the one employed if we still had Hoffman. Idiot (him, not you).

    Depending on how well they want to do it, we could easily be talking about a team of 20+ people working for the better part of a year to do one sequence believably.

    The FX budget has likely just gone up by $2-3m, I don’t know what Hoffman was getting paid, but I’m doubting it was $2m for 30 seconds of footage.

    Of course, they’ll just do it in Canada and get the government to subsidize half the cost, that seems to be the current modus operandi for visual effects these days, because fuck knows, even if you have a license to print money like The Hunger Games trilogy, you still apparently need 40-50% subsidies in order to turn a profit.

    Ha, just kidding, no movie in the history of Hollywood has ever turned a profit 😉

  • Doubting Thomas

    No. Not going to watch it. Already know that making sense of Beck is futile. Will spend the time doing something useful like picking my nose.

  • http://www.facebook.com/den.wilson d.c.wilson

    schism@20:

    Oh, that’s easy. All of Beck’s arguments really boil down to “PAY ATTENTION TO ME. ALL OF YOU. DO IT NOW.”

    And call Goldline.

    MO@11:

    “Man on internet decries technology”

    That was my first thought. Here’s a guy who has built his entire scam career on technology: radio, television, and the internet. But maybe we have it all wrong and that’s why none of us can make sense of his rants. As a rigthwing authoritarian, Beck probably sees “authoritarian porn” as a good thing.

  • jnorris

    Albert Bakker (#12) may just be right. What if all one is seeing on Mr Beck’s internet show is a word salad spewing, lip-sinced automatron while the Real Glenn Beck is hiding in his fortress in Independence USA?

  • http://timgueguen.blogspot.com timgueguen

    Glenn, old buddy if it weren’t for technology allowing us to have 100 channels of 24 hour cable TV you’d be nothing You’d be a columnist in some weekly small town paper with an audience of a couple hundred in a good week, and spend the rest of your time as a janitor at the local Mormon temple.

  • zmidponk

    Hang on, because they are going to digitally create Philip Seymour Hoffman in order to finish his scenes in the Hunger Games, there’s ‘less for people to do’? Does he not realise that doing this requires work? And that the people doing that work get paid for doing it? Maybe he’s been watching too many films and TV shows where such things are done in about 30 seconds with somebody quickly typing ‘kjdafhkjsabc.kvdhs.’ and clicking a mouse a couple of times.