Selwyn Duke is An Idiot

First Lady Michelle Obama gave a commencement speech in Topeka, Kansas, the school district that was the subject of the Supreme Court’s ruling in Brown v Board of Education. Unsurprisingly, she mentioned that ruling and the good that desegregation had done. That was enough to send Selwyn Duke into a total hissy fit.

Tony Bennett left his heart in San Francisco – and Michelle Obama left her brain in 1954.

Addressing graduating high-school students the other day in the Topeka, Kansas, school district, the federal lunch lady said, referring to the Brown v. Board of Education decision, “[Y]our experience here in Topeka would have been unimaginable back in 1954….” And perhaps this is true.

It also would have been unimaginable back in 1554 or 954. After all, the institutions making that experience possible hadn’t been birthed yet.

You know, those institutions created by European/ European-descent civilization.

That civilization that Darth Vegan is tacitly impugning with her racial agitation.

The point is that if you’re going to talk about the past, don’t tendentiously cherry-pick it for destructive ideological purposes. It’s much as discussion about slavery. Not only is the focus always on the less than one percent of the history of slavery that was written in the US (it’s one of the world’s oldest institutions), but the most significant point is missed: Whites were not the first to practice slavery.

But they were the first to abolish it.

If some take offense at this, they can pound sand. I take offense at the constant derision aimed at my civilization by critics who should get down on their knees, kiss the ground trod by our ancestors and thank God for our civilization’s existence.

Okay, let’s not mince words: Selwyn Duke is a weapons-grade moron. What else is there to say? This is the same guy who, just a few months ago, talked about the “supposedly racist” apartheid regime in South Africa and its “so-called crimes” against black people. He also thinks states should secede over gay rights. The lesson, as always: There is no limit to how stupid, irrational or bigoted you can be while still being taken seriously by the right wing.

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  • John Pieret

    Whites were not the first to practice slavery.

    But white Americans were among the ones who most widely practiced it and practiced in ways among the most horrible. But what does slavery have to do with “separate but unequal? We ended slavery about 90 years before 1954 but we were still denying people equality because of skin color. We have incrementally improved since 1954, but it is still a relevant issue today.

  • corporal klinger

    I suppose he gets his morals directly from god and the bible.

    I mean, what other way is there to be a decent, good person?

    I feel the need now to wash my hands.

  • Nice Ogress

    I used to date a fellow who believed – firmly – that history was an inevitable progression forward, with an emphasis on the ‘inevitable’ part. That is to say, if Rosa Parks hadn’t stood up, someone else would have. If FDR hadn’t devised the New Deal, someone else would have. If MLK hadn’t.. well, you get the idea.

    He found this “philosophy” appealing because it a) made it permissible for him to badmouth individuals (both historical figures and contemporary) and belittle their accomplishments, and b) excused him from having to do anything to make the world a better place himself.

    It was just going to improve naturally, you see. Because philosophy.

    Our Boy Selwyn here seems to subscribe to the same bad magazines.

  • corporal klinger

    Actually I need a shower. Reading this kind of shit from fellow human beings makes me feel dirty.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1159674804 robertbaden

    Someone should remind hi there are people still alive who remember this occurring, and didn’t read it in a history book.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    He also thinks states should secede over gay rights.

    Sure, but what will the USA be like when California and the North East leave the country?

  • raven

    Sure, but what will the USA be like when California and the North East leave the country?

    It already has a name. Dumbfuckistan.

  • raven

    I used to date a fellow who believed – firmly – that history was an inevitable progression forward, with an emphasis on the ‘inevitable’ part.

    Countries can go backwards. They do it all the time.

    In fact, the USA has been going backwards since Bill Clinton left office.

    The 21st century has been a huge disappointment. Instead of flying cars, we got Bush, Cheney, the Iraq war, the Great Recession, and the Tea Party.

  • Ben P

    But white Americans were among the ones who most widely practiced it and practiced in ways among the most horrible. But what does slavery have to do with “separate but unequal? We ended slavery about 90 years before 1954 but we were still denying people equality because of skin color. We have incrementally improved since 1954, but it is still a relevant issue today.

    That’s more or less what I was going to note.

    Yeah, Slavery has existed for most of human existence. And while any kind of slavery is certainly an affront to human freedom, race based slavery is much more pernicious and destructive.

  • sinned34

    Is it just me, or does the Republican revulsion for and attacks on Michelle Obama seem incredibly intense? I don’t recall Democrats expressing and demonstrating such absolute hate of Laura or Barbara Bush while their husbands were serving as President. I was conservative up until George W’s second term, so I don’t think I’m experiencing confirmation bias when I feel like the right wing is going after Michelle Obama with unprecedented zeal.

  • raven

    Is it just me, or does the Republican revulsion for and attacks on Michelle Obama seem incredibly intense?

    Seems like it. And as well to Obama.

    1. Political polarization is at record highs. The GOP is actively trying to sabotage Obama, the Democrats, and the USA. They would rather wound or destroy the USA than see Obama actually accomplish something worthwhile.

    This is new. In times past, the two parties would at least try to compromise and run the country.

    2. Obama has received more death threats than any other president in history.

    3. He and Michele have been insulted and demonized relentlessly. Obama is a commie, Marxist, socialist, Kenyan born, Moslem, terrorist, antichrist, UFO alien coplotter who tried to nuke Chaleston, SC and on and on.

    Someone wrote an article recently pointing out that half the USA is behaving like noncivilized sub-barbarians and if they had a decent bone in their body, they would apologize to him. (Which will happen when hell freezes over.)

  • raven

    Ironically, Obama has done an OK job, especially compared to Moron Bush and Darth Cheney. The Iraq war is over for us, Afghanistan is winding down, the economy has been growing for years, unemployment is down from 10% to 6%, the annual deficit is down from 1.7 trillion USD to 480 billion, he got the ACA passed and running, and fixed Medicare solvency for 6 additional years. All this with the GOP trying to block him every step of the way.

    And…my 401(K) plan is back from the dead. It died during the Great Recession, being all in the stock market like almost all of them. The markets have been making record highs and so has my 401(K) plan.

  • dhall

    #10 – You’re right; they hate even more than they hated Hillary when she tried to get health care reform rolling. Their complaints were that she was not an elected official, but she was messing around with policy. Michelle has been a horrible, uppity First Lady too, talking about healthy nutrition for kids and all. Or maybe it’s because she’s married to the evil birther Kenyan fascist socialist Muslim and helping him to carry out his nefarious plans. Or maybe it’s just because she’s not white.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    sinned34 “Is it just me, or does the Republican revulsion for and attacks on Michelle Obama seem incredibly intense?”

    Michelle now is Hillary in the 1990s, plus race, plus 2001-2008, plus a much larger Rightwing Noise Machine, plus, plus, plus, etc.

  • yellowsubmarine

    “It already has a name. Dumbfuckistan.”

    I think you mean ‘Murica.

  • dukeofomnium

    The lesson, as always: There is no limit to how stupid, irrational or bigoted you can be while still being taken seriously by the right wing.

    A political Poe’s Law.

  • zmidponk

    Nice Ogress #3:

    I used to date a fellow who believed – firmly – that history was an inevitable progression forward, with an emphasis on the ‘inevitable’ part. That is to say, if Rosa Parks hadn’t stood up, someone else would have. If FDR hadn’t devised the New Deal, someone else would have. If MLK hadn’t.. well, you get the idea.

    Actually, I would like to think this is true, but people like Rosa Parks, MLK, etc, have the courage to make it then and there, not later and somewhere else.

  • John Pieret

    Actually, I would like to think this is true, but people like Rosa Parks, MLK, etc, have the courage to make it then and there, not later and somewhere else.

    Yes and no. The idea of inevitable progress of human history is called “Whig history” and is, at least locally, certainly false. On the other hand, the idea that history is driven by “great men” (lately grudgingly allowing for “great women”) is also certainly false. The reboot of Cosmos has been perpetrating that latter myth quite a bit, such as saying that, if Michael Faraday had not lived we would not have electronics today.

    It is a mixture of both. Humans, as long as they survive, will probably “progress” (depending on who is defining “progression”) but it doesn’t depend on particular people, though you are right that those “great” people tend to be the ones who make it happen “then and there,” but not always to our liking (ala Hitler and Stalin).

  • lofgren

    Ugh. Tangential personal share: An individual who I previously called “friend” said a bunch of BULLSHIT along Duke’s line of reasoning a couple of weeks ago. This is probably my second most hated historical pet peeve. And he immediately followed it up with my #1 historical pet peeve, which would be pointing out that Native Americans weren’t all super-nice nature faeries and even once in a while, gasp, fought wars against one another in order to downplay the significance of the genocide against those people. YES, THE NATIVE AMERICANS WERE REAL PEOPLE WHO BEHAVED JUST LIKE REAL PEOPLE DO. How does this make it OK to slaughter them by the (at least) hundreds of thousands again? The fact that a group of people failed to live up to your colonialist mythology about them doesn’t make them deserving of murder. (Since he is Jewish I pointed out that there is a rather famous book, called Numbers, about all the people the Jews have massacred over the centuries, but we don’t walk around claiming that they deserved the Holocaust. To his credit that appeared to actually make him stop and think.)

    I am currently undecided as to whether I want to continue associating with this person.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    John Pieret “…but not always to our liking (ala Hitler and Stalin).”

    Worse, they both shouted their way through their cover of Islands in the Stream.

  • John Pieret

    Modus:

    The Dolly Parton/Kenny Rogers or Hemingway versions?

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    John Pieret, Hemingway. although half a duet was a bit odd, he had a voice like an angel.

  • colnago80

    Re John Pieret @ #18

    On the other hand, the idea that history is driven by “great men” (lately grudgingly allowing for “great women”) is also certainly false. The reboot of Cosmos has been perpetrating that latter myth quite a bit, such as saying that, if Michael Faraday had not lived we would not have electronics today.

    As Charles DeGaulle was once quoting as saying, the graveyards are full of indispensable men.

  • John Pieret

    although half a duet was a bit odd, he had a voice like an angel.

    As always. Modus, when we have a little fun together. you always come out on top! STOP THAT! … or we will have to get gay married! … and I don’t want to be known as your “wife.”

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    John Pieret, like you haven’t heard his Christmas album.

  • sinned34

    Hemingway’s Christmas album was alright, but the speed metal album he released as a teen changed my life. That cylinder still gets a regular rotation on my phonograph.

  • John Pieret

    Okay, the the speed metal album was great but I’m still not going to be Modus’ wife … unless the engagement rock is really nice …

  • Ichthyic

    Darth Vegan

    Darth Vegan??

    i don’t even…

    wut?

  • http://polrant@blogspot.com democommie

    This guy:

    http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=Selwyn+Duke+Photo&id=D98C1F17E82EA1A185A37793D2B0D297F2092FAB&FORM=IQFRBA#view=detail&id=D98C1F17E82EA1A185A37793D2B0D297F2092FAB&selectedIndex=0

    wants to secede over teh GAYrights*?

    Duke’s bio, what there is of it that I could FIND, says he’s a former tennis pro. USTA doesn’t list him and I’m almost certain that he’s not a member of the American Tennis Association (since that’s an African-American org).

    “That cylinder still gets a regular rotation on my phonograph.”

    Ohhh, cool. I have an ION tape to digital memory player/converter but I couldn’t afford the gramophone to phonograph converter.

    “I feel the need now to wash my hands.” “Actually I need a shower.”

    I have a sign in my bathroom that says:

    “All guests (ha, ha–that’s a little joke) must wash hands vigorously with soap, warm water and bleach after pinching off a Selwynduke. True Story.

    * Before the “homophobicommie shitstorms starts, lighten the fuck up.

  • http://polrant@blogspot.com democommie

    “Darth Vegan?? i don’t even…wut?”

    It’s a reference to Michelle Obama’s program for FORCEFEEDING vegetables to white KKKristian children while they’re being religiously persecuted in public schools.

  • caseloweraz

    “Darth Vegan”? The wordplay is weak with this one.

    Interestingly, among the 95 anagrams for Selwyn Duke are “”Deny we sulk” and “El new dusky.”

    I trust everyone here knows what “dusky” is a euphemism for.

  • StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    Reads title : selwyn-duke-is-an-idiot/ thinks

    “Well meh, we all have our moments, we can all be idiots occasionally.

    (& yeah some of us have more moments than most – mea culpa.)

    Reads further down :

    This is the same guy who, just a few months ago, talked about the “supposedly racist” apartheid regime in South Africa and its “so-called crimes” against black people. He also thinks states should secede over gay rights.

    DAFUCK!!!???!!!?

    Okay, yeah, its hard for anyone even me to top that idiocy~wise.

  • StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    @ 32. caseloweraz : “I trust everyone here knows what “dusky” is a euphemism for.”

    Twilight? The Dawn robotic spacecraft’s mission to asteroids Ceres and Vesta? Vampires? Sunsets adn sunrises and teh crowds of onlookers they attract? People who can’t pronounce the name of a certain breed of dog renowned for pulling sledges over ice , used by Captain Scott and others to explore Antartica and often prefixed with Siberian or Alaskan? Nah, dunno.

  • StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    If South Africa in its fucking apartheid days was only “supposedly” racist then I truly hate to think what this scumbag would accept as actually indisputably *obviously* racist.

  • StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    @23. Colnago80 : “..indispensable men.”

    Isn’t that what pharmacists / ‘chemists’ (right US lingo?) call male customers who can’t pay?

  • caseloweraz

    Very good, Stevo. But you missed “lusty” and “busty.” Speaking of which, there’s a song by the Doors that makes good use of “dusky”: “Hello I Love You.”

    You could look it up on YouTube, but to save you listening to the whole thing, here’s the verse:

    Sidewalk crouches at her feet

    Like a dog that begs for something sweet.

    Do you think you’ll make her see you, fool?

    Do you hope to pluck this dusky jewel?

    That predates “Brown Sugar,” I believe.

  • caseloweraz

    Yet another anagram for Selwyn Duke is “We nuked Sly.”

    Hmmm. Haven’t seen Sly and the Family Stone for a while…

  • http://polrant@blogspot.com democommie

    @ 37:

    Is “fucking piece-of-shit racist” on that list of anagrams?

  • Nice Ogress

    If South Africa in its fucking apartheid days was only “supposedly” racist then I truly hate to think what this scumbag would accept as actually indisputably *obviously* racist.

    Oh, that’s easy, Stev0r: Anything bad that happens to white people, ever.

    Has some lily-white person stubbed a toe recently? OMG. Racism.

  • http://polrant@blogspot.com democommie

    “Has some lily-white person stubbed a toe recently?”

    Well, only if it happened while he wasn’t part of a gang, “puttin’ the boots to” oneathem black-o-perps. If he’s doing that than he’s being a brave and EXCEPTIONAL MurKKKan!

  • dingojack

    How about:

    Dusky newel? Nudely skew? New sulky Ed? We end sulky? Yew sulk den? Deny we sulk? Nu slew dyke? Nu sky wedel? Weedy Slunk? We lend yuks? New sky duel? Ye lewd sunk? New dusk lye? El Yuk wends? El New Dusky? Wee sly dunk? Dewy Elk Sun? – or even: We dun El Sky?

    :) Dingo

  • Ichthyic

    It’s a reference to Michelle Obama’s program for FORCEFEEDING vegetables to white KKKristian children while they’re being religiously persecuted in public schools.

    oh, of course, how silly of me not to have seen the obvious reference!

    O.o