Klingenschmitt: Judge Jones is Demon-Possessed

Gordon Klingenschmitt is once again diagnosing people he’s never met as being possessed by demons. Whenever anyone does or says something he doesn’t like, it could only be because demons have taken control of them. This time it’s Judge Jones, who must be possessed by a demon in order to “conspire against God” by overturning Pennsylvania’s ban on same-sex marriage.

As Klingenschmitt explained, whenever people “invite the Devil to rule our hearts,” it results in “a demonic spirit of sexual immorality” manifesting itself through their sinful behavior. And that is exactly what happened with “tyrant” Judge John Jones III, who, driven by a “demonic spirit of pride,” sought to “conspire against God” by tossing Jesus and the Bible on the ash heap of history with his marriage ruling.

Is there a demon of stupidity?

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  • colnago80

    As the British would say, the Klinger is quite round the bend.

  • eric

    Is there a demon of stupidity?

    I used to think there wasn’t, but the demon of confirmation bias assures me any evidence against demons is best ignored.

  • http://www.ranum.com Marcus Ranum

    He seems to be pretty obsessed with people having demons in them. I wonder what his sleeptime fantasies are like?

  • Kevin Kehres

    Every time I hear guys like this, I think of Carl Sagan. We still live in a demon-haunted world, don’t we?

  • http://www.ranum.com Marcus Ranum

    We still live in a demon-haunted world, don’t we?

    No, they do.

  • StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    @ ^ Kevin Kehres : We may not but sadly all too many people still seem to do so.

  • Martin, heading for geezerhood

    @colnag0 #1:

    No. Some would say that he is “Harpic”*, others (usually younger and/or less urban) would go straight for the punchline and say he is “Clean around the bend”.

    *Harpic is a toilet cleansing product that claimed, in an early advertising campaign, to “clean around the bend”.

  • http://zenoferox.blogspot.com/ Zeno

    I laugh every time Klingenschmitt says “let’s discern the spirits.” Discernment is not one of his skills.

  • dingojack

    Zeno – I’m guessing that, in order to believe even a smidgen of the shit that comes out of his mouth, ‘Fruity’ Gordo Klingshitt is an expert on drinking the distilled spirits.

    Dingo

  • anubisprime

    @ OP

    whenever people “invite the Devil to rule our hearts,” it results in “a demonic spirit of sexual immorality” manifesting itself through their sinful behavior

    One hell of a way to sell the lifestyle Klingonshit!…so this invitation to the devil…it sounds totally reprehensible and fuckin’ awesome……please elucidate more on it Gordo!

  • scienceavenger

    Gordon Klingenschmitt joins Cal Thomas as one of the great thinkers of the 15th century.

  • 12ab

    Recently, at a public gathering where politics were being discussed, one attendee took charge of the floor and went on a wild tirade ranting and raving about a certain political position. Klingenschmitt responded by saying words to the effect of “Let’s discern the spirits. I discern that you are possessed by the spirit of anger.” The attendees howled with laughter at K’s “discernment” of the obvious. Ed is 100% correct in his assessment that anyone who doesn’t agree with Klinger’s position on anything must be demon possessed per Klinger’s perspective. Klinger has always been one who spins and twists the truth to accommodate his own interpretation of any situation. I think I recall one of his former colleagues saying that he was the only person he knew who could take 5 truths and spin them into an untruth! In light of this, let’s discern the spirits; perhaps he is possessed by the demon of deceit?

  • http://www.facebook.com/josef.mulroney Josef Mulroney

    “driven by a ‘demonic spirit of pride,’ sought to ‘conspire against God’ by tossing Jesus and the Bible on the ash heap of history with his marriage ruling.”

    finally!

  • petemoulton

    To someone like Gordo, Judge Jones must be “doubly possessed.” After all, Jones was also the presiding judge in the Kitzmiller vs Dover trial, where he ruled that ID is indeed cretinism.

  • Trebuchet
  • blf

    Is there a demon of stupidity?

    It’s known as Klingenschmitt.

  • colnago80

    Re #7

    The British might also describe the Klinger as raving bonkers.

  • blf

    The British might also describe the Klinger as raving bonkers.

    Nah, he’s too much of a nutter even for the Tories.

  • marcus

    “And that is exactly what happened with “tyrant” Judge John Jones III, who, driven by a “demonic spirit of pride,” sought to “conspire against God” by tossing Jesus and the Bible on the ash heap of history with his marriage ruling.”

    All right! Done and done! Who knew it would so easy? Thanks Judge Jones!

  • caseloweraz

    For a few minutes there, I was Lemon Demon possessed.

    It’s positively mnemonic!

  • D. C. Sessions

    When you add up all of the people in the USA that Klinger believes to be possessed by demons, there aren’t many left. Which means that his world must resemble the Zombie Apocalypse, with all of us Possessed shambling around conspiring to do evil to him and the the handful of remaining free souls.

    It must be mortally terrifying. I can’t imagine anyone who deserves it more.

    Of course, if the Open Carry types get to him and someone suggests that a head shot is a sure cure for possession …

  • busterggi

    If only there was a higher power of some sort, something supernaturally more powerful than demons say, that loved humanity and wanted to protect us from evil.

  • thebookofdave

    Judge Jones looks pretty fit at 59 years old. I bet it takes a lot more than one demon to drive him. There’s probably a team of specialists working him over day and night: demons of logic, demons of experience, and demons of jurisprudence. There’s probably a demon of pride on the team as well, hired as a consultant.

  • grumpyoldfart

    The sad thing is that tens of millions of Christians probably agree with every word Klingenschmitt said. Stupidity runs deep in the USA

  • dingojack

    I wonder if UKIP would take him?

    Dingo

  • steve84

    Remember that this loon was qualified to be a chaplain by the US military. And there are probably plenty more just like him. Scary.

  • danimal12

    Demon possession aside, this statement shows a profound lack of respect for a public official. Of course, it’s fine to disagree with judicial decisions but it isn’t fine to attack people by labeling them demon possessed. I heard constantly that christians were the country’s best citizens. I beg to disagree.