William Gheen, the terribly bigoted head of the Americans for Legal Immigration PAC, joined Alex Jones on his daily shitshow to concoct a sort of Grand Unified Theory of Obama Conspiracies, pulling together multiple independent spook stories into one big melting pot of paranoia:
“They’re doing that by bringing in people who have no shared national or cultural experience with us, that are willing to literally say or do anything that their new masters call on them to do to protect their positions,” Gheen said. “Once Obama brings these ‘kids’ in, gives them their Obamaphone, enrolls them in Obamacare, puts them in a public school, pays for their housing, pays for their foods…These people will do anything that their leaders call them to do, and I mean literally anything.”
“The problem about trying to take up full gun confiscation and cracking down in a totalitarian fashion against American citizens is, who amongst the country hates their fellow countrymen and women so much that you can turn them to do that? They only have a small section of people that are willing to do that, and it’s probably going to be the people who remain loyal to Obama to the very end,” he continued.
“These people that come in, if they come to them and say, ‘You must do this for your glorious leader or you’re going back to the jungle and you gotta give the phone back and the food back and the free lodging back,’ they’ll probably, most of them will make the decision to do about anything.”
“That’s like the African child slave soldiers,” Jones responded. “That’s how all those African countries are run is off of poor kids, they grab at 12 and give a machine gun to. Obama talks about his national security force, just as big, just as strong as our military. It’s so bold, but when you look at it, they really are doing that.”
This is what makes Poe’s Law so powerful. How do you parody something this moronic and disconnected from reality?