Porter’s ‘Appeal to Heaven’ to Pass Fetal Heartbeat Bill

Janet Porter, the extreme anti-choice activist who has been trying everything to pass a law in Ohio that would ban abortion if a fetal heartbeat can be detected, says she’s no longer going to appeal to legislators or voters to pass the bill — she’s “going over their heads” to God.

We’ve called. We’ve rallied. We’ve lobbied. On September 17th, we’re going over their heads!

AN APPEAL TO HEAVEN

Wednesday, September 17th

Ohio Statehouse-High St. Side

10:00 am – 1:00 pm

To pass the Heartbeat Bill

Pastors from around the state will lead us as we go over the heads of the elected officials with an Appeal to Heaven!

That’s a great idea. I’m sure it will work so much better than all the previous rallies you’ve held and the millions of prayers you’ve already prayed on this subject. Maybe you just didn’t hit the magic number to get God’s attention. Of course, God isn’t registered voter in Ohio and he doesn’t have the requisite photo ID to vote even if he was.

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About Ed Brayton

After spending several years touring the country as a stand up comedian, Ed Brayton tired of explaining his jokes to small groups of dazed illiterates and turned to writing as the most common outlet for the voices in his head. He has appeared on the Rachel Maddow Show and the Thom Hartmann Show, and is almost certain that he is the only person ever to make fun of Chuck Norris on C-SPAN.

  • Reginald Selkirk

    For me, this solidifies the case that their arguments are religious, and therefore they should not be attempting to impose their religious beliefs on others.

  • lldayo

    For me, this solidifies the case that their arguments are religious, and therefore they should not be attempting to impose their religious beliefs on others.

    Which could make it interesting if the bill were to actually be passed. Could this bill be nullified by a judge if evidence was shown this was religiously based?

  • Pierce R. Butler

    So many things go so far over state legislators’ heads – will they notice one more?

  • Chiroptera

    Ildayo, #2:

    I fear the opposite now that the Court has indicated a fetish for “sincerely held religious belief.”

  • Synfandel

    Of course, God isn’t registered voter in Ohio and he doesn’t have the requisite photo ID to vote even if he was.

    Plus, he’s been gerrymandered into an overwhelmingly pro-God district, so his vote wouldn’t matter anyway.

  • coragyps

    Is there a photo ID so encrypted that God can’t make himself a fake one???

  • busterggi

    They’ve been praying to god for decades and he’s done nothing, there is only one thing to do – appeal to an even greater authority for help.

    [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FKss2pBYQ6Y&w=420&h=315

  • freehand

    coragyps says: Is there a photo ID so encrypted that God can’t make himself a fake one???

    .

    Surely the question is: Can God encrypt a file so deeply that even He can’t hack it?

  • forestdragon

    Reminds me of a line from an episode of M*A*S*H when Houlihan was going to gripe to some general she knew about what Colonel Blake was doing –

    “You’ve [gone over my head] so many times I’ve got footprints on my scalp!”

  • http://atheist-faq.com Jasper of Maine

    Pastors from around the state will lead us as we go over the heads of the elected officials with an Appeal to Heaven!

    Didn’t we learn in another thread that our democracy was based on Christianity? This isn’t very… democratic.


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