Klingenschmitt Thinks Christians Forced to ‘Worship Sodomy’

Ah, good ol’ Gordon Klingenschmitt. He can always be counted on to spout the most illogical, hyperbolic and hysterical things about pretty much any subject. In a recent email to his followers about the case of a business in New York being fined for refusing to host a same-sex wedding that this is banning Christian worship and Christians are now being forced to “worship sodomy.”

Christians are fined $13,000 and may no longer celebrate the Christian sacrament of marriage in their own home, unless they also host lesbian weddings. Literally the court is banning Christian worship, saying these Christian farmers cannot worship Christ during a wedding, unless they also worship and participate equally in sodomy in their own home. They are now coming into our homes, and dictating our worship. This unconstitutional policy, to punish Christians (with no religious exemptions) will be law in all 50 states, if ENDA is passed.]

Banning Christian worship! Except this has nothing to do with worship. It isn’t a church, which is exempted from all non-discrimination laws, it’s a business that is open to the public. But Klingenschmitt is just getting warmed up:

Democrats are literally trying to outlaw Christianity. Think about that. They now hate religious freedom so much, they’re voting to reverse the 1993 Religious Freedom Restoration Act, which back then was passed 97 to 3 by nearly all Democrats in the U.S. Senate. Today only 42 Republicans defend Christianity. Wow.

But if you’ll just send this dolt more money, he’ll save Christianity from the evil hordes who are not doing what he claims they’re doing.

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  • dingojack

    Hell yeah! Christians shouldn’t be forced to worship sodomy!

    They should be allowed to practice sodomy, on non-consenting children, whilst worshipping cannibalism and vampirism, just like god sanctioned!

    @@

    Dingo

  • alanb

    Literally the court is banning Christian worship, saying these Christian farmers cannot worship Christ during a wedding, unless they also worship and participate equally in sodomy in their own home.

    Where are these weddings where people are being force to participate in sodomy of which he speaks?

  • http://artk.typepad.com ArtK

    Where are these weddings where people are being force to participate in sodomy of which he speaks?

    They exist in his fevered brain. He gets very hot and sweaty thinking about it, imagining all those good Christians having to perform “unnatural” acts. You should see what happens to Gordon when he sees some nun-porn.

  • sugarfrosted

    Sodomy during a wedding? That’s an awesome idea. Why didn’t I think of that. Thanks Klingleschmidt, now weddings will be less boring.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    alanb “Where are these weddings where people are being force to participate in sodomy of which he speaks?”

    You are cordially invited to the wedding of Adam and Steve, to start promptly at 6pm in Homo Church [formerly Mark ‘n’ Lisa’s Christian Farm for Christians and Jesus].

    Dinner (steak or chicken, check one), at 8pm, followed by forced sodomy at the Legion Hall afterwards.

    RSVP requested promptly.”

  • a_ray_in_dilbert_space

    I wonder how many times a day Gordo thinks of sodomy.

  • http://howlandbolton.com richardelguru

    ArtK

    “You should see what happens to Gordon when he sees some nun-porn.”

    Actually I don’t think we should….Eeeeeeeewww!

  • bushrat

    @5 If there’s an open bar, I’m in.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    bushrat, it’s a cash bar, but the profits are going to support the Homosexual Agenda.

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    …Christians are now being forced to “worship sodomy.”

    Yet another really great plot for yet another really silly gay-porn movie. This guy is in the wrong line of work.

    Y’know, there’s REAL persecution of Christians going on these days, and these wankers don’t even seem to notice, let alone give a shit. Except maybe to demand the victims support Israel…

  • bushrat

    Modusoperandi, As long as it’s supporting someone’s Agenda, I guess I can spend a few bucks. Besides I look fabulous in my formal ass-less chaps.

  • Loqi

    I can’t help but notice that when other right wingers toss a word salad, they inadvertantly create excellent band names, but when Gordo does it, he comes up with porn titles. Had they been contemporaries, I think he’d have been Freud’s favorite subject.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Loqi “I can’t help but notice that when other right wingers toss a word salad, they inadvertantly create excellent band names…”

    To be fair, that applies to virtually everyone on the internet.

     

    “Freud’s favorite subject”

    Dibs on band name!

  • dugglebogey

    How do lesbians perform sodomy?

  • D. C. Sessions

    How do lesbians perform sodomy?

    They refuse hospitality to strangers.

  • gilgamesh

    AFAIK Sodomy isn’t just anal sex, it’s also oral sex as well. Which seems to imply that Fundnut Christians never go downtown if you know what I mean nudge nudge. What sad, sad people they are. That, or they do have oral sex, and since they go to straight weddings they are worshiping their Jesus Approved Sodomy ™ in Christ approved fashion.

  • http://timgueguen.blogspot.com timgueguen

    gilgamesh, of course they don’t do oral sex. Only the minimum action required to make a baby is allowed. “Lie back and think of Jesus watching you, because he’s big on voyeurism.”

  • dingojack

    MO (#9) – is the bar in the homosexual lobby?

    Dingo

  • felicis

    I always wonder – don’t the gay weddings conducted by Christian officiants count as ‘Christian’ too? I mean, I know they only want to allow their particular flavor of Christianity, but they seem to be ignoring the fact that a number of denominations have performed gay marriages for years.