Priests Perform Exorcism at Venue Where Black Mass Was Held

Worried that the ridiculous little rake ritual put on by a bunch of childish “satanists” in Oklahoma City might have released non-existent “demons” into the city, Catholic officials in the area say they have done the very important duty of exorcising any of those supernatural bad guys from the venue at which it was held.

Oklahoma City’s Roman Catholic archdiocese said on Thursday that its archbishop and a priest performed “prayers of exorcism” to help rid the Oklahoma City Civic Center Music Hall of dangerous spirits after a satanic “black mass” was held there.

The black mass was held Sept. 21 at the venue by a satanist group known as the Dakhma of Angra Mainyu Syndicate despite protests from the archdiocese. Thousands of people demonstrated outside the event.

Aarchdiocese spokeswoman Diane Clay said the ancient exorcism ritual was performed the following day at the public’s request. She said the archdiocese received dozens of emails and calls from people concerned about entering the building or attending events there.

“From the beginning, we have taken seriously the dark and dangerous spirits being invited into our community,” Archbishop Paul Coakley said Thursday in a written statement. “To address those concerns, we visited the venue the next morning to pray prayers of exorcism over the place and to pray the prayers for cleansing.”

Well good for you. You could have been more useful, I imagine, by picking up litter from the parking lot.

POPULAR AT PATHEOS Nonreligious
What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Deacon Duncan

    And so the demons all fled the auditorium and are now roaming the streets. Good job dude.

  • dingojack

    What no litter of piglets?

    Babe: demon pig. (The little known horror sequel)

    @@ Dingo

  • sugarfrosted

    The black mass was just to make Catholics look more ridiculous than usual.

  • http://Www.metalmischief.com YOB – Ye Olde Blacksmith

    I’ve got one of the folding chairs that was in a closet in the backstage area during the Black Mass. When I folded it up this morning, it pinched my thumb. So, the only conclusion I can reasonably come to is that it is possesed by demons summoned by the satanists that is impervious to the priest’s exorcism and therefor it is truly the “End Times” and we are all.going.to.die!

  • dingojack

    “I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: ‘O Lord make my enemies ridiculous.’ And God granted it”.

    Dingo

  • flex

    I trust they paid the venue for their own event.

  • raven

    Why would any demons that were summoned, hang around the Oklahoma Civic Center?

    It sounds like a boring place to spend their nonlives.

    They should be out doing whatever it is that demons do. Which AFAWK, is absoutely nothing.

  • grumpyoldfart

    How many of your mob fall for that shit?

  • raven

    “From the beginning, we have taken seriously the dark and dangerous spirits being invited into our community,” Archbishop Paul Coakley said Thursday…

    That is his first mistake. Believing in ancient superstitions.

    His second was acting like demons are a big deal. If the Catholic church with god, jesus, the Holy Spook, and Mary on their side can’t get rid of a few demons, why belong to it and send them money?

  • dugglebogey

    I moved here from Oklahoma City, and of all the places I’ve lived the people of OKC were the most openly hostile towards my beliefs.

  • tbp1

    I’m not the first or only one to notice this, I’m sure, but the Christian (especially Catholic) freakout gave this basically silly event, tens of thousands (maybe more) of dollars worth of free publicity. Without this there would have been even fewer attendees and virtually no one would even have been aware of it.

  • Pierce R. Butler

    Deacon Duncan @ # 1: … the demons all fled the auditorium and are now roaming the streets.

    Aw, c’mon, everybody knows dispossessed demons infest the nearest herd of swine. Look for them in the state legislature.

  • D. C. Sessions

    Here’s the thing, though: why should the Protestant people of OKC believe that a bunch of Catholics, of all people, have the Divine charter to give the demons [1] the heave-ho?

    This isn’t over yet. It’s time for every church in Oklahoma to have a go — at least one of them should be able to do the job!

    [1] They all agree that Satanist rituals do invoke demons, anyway

  • Chiroptera

    …by a bunch of childish “satanists” in Oklahoma City….

    Surely the word “childish” is better used on the Catholics who are performing the exorcism since this is part of their tantrum from their not wanting to share the public spaces?

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    I feel safer knowing that there are still some people in the world willing to stand up and protect me from their imagination.

  • dingojack

    Eaven asked: “Why would any demons that were summoned, hang around the Oklahoma Civic Center?”

    Perhaps they were pining for hell, and wanted to get as close as they reasonably could?

    😉 Dingo

  • Big Boppa

    HAHAHAHAHAH. The Catholic church, aka NAMBLA with fancy robes, exorcising “demons”. You really can’t make this shit up.

  • lldayo

    I’m so glad they got rid of those pesky demons! Now, I gotta write this check out to, how do you spell it? A-R-C-H-D-I-O-C-E-S-E?

  • Usernames are smart

    Aw, c’mon, everybody knows dispossessed demons infest the nearest herd of swine.

    — Pierce R. Butler (#12)

    Not.

    Mah.

    BACON!!!!111

  • Sastra

    She said the archdiocese received dozens of emails and calls from people concerned about entering the building or attending events there.

    Wait — this works?

    Maybe they could start performing daily black masses in front of abortion clinics.

  • tbp1

    @#13: I’ve wondered about that too. I grew up in the Texas Panhandle, not that far physically from OKC and quite similar culturally. Discussions of Roman Catholicism frequently included terms like “Hell-bound idol worshippers” and “whore of Babylon.” I knew lots of folks who thought that a regular RCC mass was satanic and would have been perfectly happy to outlaw them if they could have.

  • whheydt

    Have they started blaming the Black mass for SCOTUS denying cert to the Oklahoma anti-SSM appeal yet?

  • Funny Diva

    So…is a “little rake ritual” something that happens at a hoedown, or is it some obscure type of Morris dance?

    Sastra @20:

    WIN! Let’s TRY IT!

  • eric

    @5;

    I trust they paid the venue for their own event.

    Yeah, that was my thought. The real winner here is the OK Civic Center. I wonder if there’s some cynical administrator somewhere saying to him/herself “how do we make this an annual event?” Also, given that ‘thousands’ of people showed up to protest the satanic ritual, I hope they learned their lesson and now charge a parking fee.

  • John Pieret

    sugarfrosted @ 3:

    The black mass was just to make Catholics look more ridiculous than usual.

    OMG! Satan must be real! … because the Black Mass sure worked!

  • Nick Gotts

    I trust they paid the venue for their own event. – alex@5

    The priests, the Satanists, or the demons?

  • jonathangray

    Big Boppa:

    The Catholic church, aka NAMBLA with fancy robes

    Wow. I had no idea Allen Ginsberg, Harvey Milk and Samuel R Delany supported the RCC.

  • vereverum

    @ eric #24

    I hope they learned their lesson and now charge a parking fee.

    You think they didn’t the first time?

    The world’s first installed parking meter was in Oklahoma City on July 16, 1935. (Wikipedia)

  • colnago80

    Re #27

    Of course, John Gray, who previously wrote a review trashing Richard Dawkins accuses Allen Ginsberg and Harvey Milk of pederasty without a shred of evidence. I don’t know what the laws in Great Britain are relative to libeling dead persons (outside of Louisiana, dead persons can’t be libeled under US law) but if they are as draconian as the British libel laws for live persons are, Johnny boy could be in trouble with their living relatives.

  • peterh

    Having an imaginary friend is often considered quaint, even mildly amusing; but having imaginary enemies is quite often considered paranoia.

  • jamessweet

    It’s basically pro wrestling. A bunch of people gather at an arena to witness a “fight” between a couple of fabricated personas. Anybody over the age of 7 ought to be able to see it’s all phony, but people play along and get all worked up about it anyway.

    The only difference is, I don’t think these guys know deep down that it isn’t real…

  • dingojack

    “She said the archdiocese received dozens of emails and calls from people concerned about entering the building or attending events there.”

    I wonder what percentage of the ‘dozens* of emails and calls’ came from members of the venue’s marketing department?

    Dingo

    ———

    * bearing in mind the world-famous ‘Second American Revoultion’, touted to attract millions, only managed a few hundred at best. Only four orders of magnitude less than the expected number.

  • DonDueed

    Funny Diva:

    So…is a “little rake ritual” something that happens at a hoedown, or is it some obscure type of Morris dance?

    Nah. Ed was just channeling Scooby Doo.

  • Electric Shaman

    A rake ritual? Is that what Sideshow Bob unwittingly stumbled into while stalking the Simpson family? To hilarious results I might add.

    As for a black mass ritual followed by a catholic exorcism, I am reminded of the South Park episode where psychics use their mind powers to battle each other. To hilarious results I might add.

  • Nick Gotts

    colnago80@29,

    Ginsberg was a member of NAMBLA, which he claimed he joined in defense of free speech. AFAIK, there is no evidence that he sexually abused underage boys. Delany has expressed his support for NAMBLA; I don’t know if he was ever a member and again, I know of no evidence that he has sexually abused underage boys. According to Randy Shilts’ biography* of Harvey Milk, he had sex with at least one vulnerable 16 year old, when he was 33. I guess this would have been illegal at the time (it would not now in the UK where the age of consent is 16), but in any case it was certainly grossly immoral. Oh, and jonathangray is not the John Gray who write the review of Dawkins. Both are British, both are so far up themselves they can look out of their own mouths, but there the resemblance ends. John Gray is a much-published political philosopher and writer and identifies as an atheist; jonathangray is an obscure ultra-traditionalist Catholic who considered John Paul II a dangerous liberal.

    Moral: before accusing even a shit like jonathangray of falsehood, or of authorship of something you dislike, make sure you know what you’re talking about.

    *I haven’t read it, I’m relying on quotes of its content.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=523300770 stuartsmith

    Now, if the Satanists are REALLY awesome, the next time the Catholics use the place for any sort of religious function, the Satanists will demand the right to go in and desecrate the place afterwards, to make sure no holiness was left to offend their dark master. Now THAT is a legal battle I’d love to watch. I mean, if the Catholics are allowed to do it to them, surely they should have the same right….

  • jonathangray

    John Gray is a much-published political philosopher and writer and identifies as an atheist; jonathangray is an obscure ultra-traditionalist Catholic

    “Obscure” is way too generous, although I flatter myself that even my poor squibs aren’t as dreary as Professor Gray’s output.

  • colnago80

    Re Nick Gotts @ #35

    I stand corrected, although the claim by Gray relative to Ginsberg, although accurate, was clearly aimed at implying impropriety on the latter’s part. As for Milk, I don’t know what the law in California (assuming the encounter took place there) was at the time but I strongly suspect it was 18. However, that’s not the whole story as statutory rape for a 16 year old would require his partner to be 3 years older, which Milk at 33 was (see discussion of the allegations made against the woman who claimed that 16 year old Justin Bieber was the father of her child (she was 20 at the time and could have been charged with statutory rape if the allegations had a leg to stand on).

    The problem is that, assuming the encounter took place in San

    Francisco, it would be extraordinarily difficult to prosecute Milk even back then if the 16 year old admitted it was consensual. San Francisco is notorious for laissez faire attitudes toward sex, both hetero and homo.

    As for the Grays, nice to know that they are two different persons; it’s not obvious considering the assholery of their literary production.