Beck Says Don’t Join the Military

It looks like Gloomy Glenn Beck is back again. In response to a caller to his show Friday, he said that he would not have his son join the military because, “We have a chance of losing our country in the next two to three years.” What that has to do with joining the military, I have no idea.

“I wouldn’t want my son joining the military now,” Beck declared, saying that no matter who becomes the next president, America is going to implode.

“Starting Tuesday, until the inauguration of the next president,” he said, “this is the most dangerous time in our nation’s history.”

“All it’s gonna take is a Black Swan event and I think we could be in deep, deep trouble,” Beck warned. “We have a chance of losing our country in the next two to three years.”

httpv://youtu.be/nuPAFqzxdyU

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  • Athywren – Social Justice Spellsword

    “We have a chance of losing our country in the next two to three years.” What that has to do with joining the military, I have no idea.

    Surely it’s obvious? If you lose the country, the military will be tasked with looking down the sides of everybody’s sofa cushions. Would you want your son to face such a horrific task? Would you?!

  • Larry Kearney

    OK, I’ll admit it. I’ve been “out-of-it” for a while and I must have missed the first Black Swan event. What is it? Is it like a Black Friday sales event down to the Walmart? That can be pretty fucking disastrous as you well may know. Obese men and women with flabby arms fighting to get into the store to score what ever the latest hot toy from China is? It would curdle your blood.

  • matty1

    @2 I think the reference is to black Swan theory. So Beck is saying that the fall of the United States would be an unexpected event but if it happened people would rationalise and claim to have seen the signs in advance. A cheeky nod to the fact his predictions are bullshit, or just picking up a term that sounds scary?

  • shouldbeworking

    Because his son will be needed at home in one of the few remaining militias still loyal to the Holy Constitution to defend gawd’s Own Country against the evil sharia law fanatics that are at this very minute sneaking across the borders from the gawdless countries that surround this blessed country ON ALL SIDES?

  • http://www.holytape.etsy.com holytape

    How can we lose the United States? It’s pretty big. And it would be pretty hard to hide. It’s not like it’s just going to fall between the couch cushions, like Belize did between 1978 and 1986.

  • http://timgueguen.blogspot.com timgueguen

    Perhaps Beck means Natalie Portman will run around firing a death ray while wearing a tutu.

    You’d think Beck would want his kind of people to join up, so there’s more support in the military when his kind of cranks launch a military coup against President Clinton.

  • John Pieret

    timgueguen @ 6:

    No, no … He must mean Tyrone Power sword fighting his way through the entire US military with Maureen O’Hara hanging on his arm!

    Beck should really get his meds checked.

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    When we lose the country, the USA will file for bankruptcy and be liquidated. The military will be an asset, soldiers included. So they will be broken up and sold for parts.

  • http://www.rodlamkey.net reverendrodney

    Aaah…. just out of curiosity…. did he follow this up with advertisements for gold and prepper things?

    Just askin’.

  • dugglebogey

    How about a false flag black swan event?

    Where the fuck do they come up with these terms?

  • brucegee1962

    Thanks, @3, for the Black Swan link. So right, he’s saying that all of the causes that he has put forward in the past decade for why the country is due for imminent collapse are wrong, because such a collapse is by its nature unpredictable; nevertheless, he continues to predict it will happen. Or maybe it’s just that he doesn’t have any idea what the words coming out of his mouth mean?

  • raven

    “All it’s gonna take is a Black Swan event and I think we could be in deep, deep trouble,” Beck babbled.

    LOL. Meaningless gibberish again.

    That is true of any time in the history of the world. We could be hit by an asteroid, nuclear war happen, an epidemic of another emerging disease such as a 1918 class flu strain that makes Ebola look like a nuisance, or even attacks by UFO aliens in flying saucers.

    While it is finitely possible, how likely is it? And what is this black swan going to look like? All he is saying is, “Something bad might happen soon.”

    Until you have the probability and shape, you are just fear mongering and doing a very poor job of it.

  • A Masked Avenger

    How about not joining the military so as not to be sent to murder foreigners in invasions that have nothing to do with self defense (and haven’t since 1812 at the latest), in order to further the interest of the rich and powerful?

    I’d consider that a much more appropriate reason for not joining the military.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    To be fair, he has a point. With a Democratic president but [potentially] GOP in control of both sides of the Legislative branch, we’ll go from almost nothing happening to a federal government completely incapable of positive action, and while that’s not a “country destroying” event, it’s pretty bad.

  • a_ray_in_dilbert_space

    I love Glenn Beck. He is an unabashed coward. He panics at the slightest sign of danger and doesn’t even bother to try to hide it. Hell, there doesn’t even have to be any real danger. He’ll pee himself just from imagining danger! This makes him a lot less dangerous than the cowards who pretend to be tough even as they are crapping themselves–e.g. Dickless Cheney.

  • Kevin Kehres

    @14..Modusoperandi

    Well, let’s hope all you kids have voted today. Shit on a shingle, I was the youngest person in line at my polling place by a LOT, and I’m no spring chicken.

    If only octogenarians vote, you’re gonna get a government that is … well … not optimal.

  • busterggi

    “All it’s gonna take is a Black Swan event and I think we could be in deep, deep trouble,”

    He’s right, saw that movie – it would cause a complete disassociation with reality much as the earlier event affected him.