Chuck Norris to Get ‘Grilled’ By Joseph Farah

This is an actual headline at the Worldnetdaily:

NO JOKE! CHUCK NORRIS MANO A MANO WITH FARAH

Superstar faces grilling on stage at Christian media convention

And just to show you how serious that “grilling” will be, they publicly fellate Norris in the rest of the article:

In a rare public appearance, legendary martial arts champion and media superstar Chuck Norris will face off on stage with WND founder Joseph Farah in the climactic event of the 15th annual National Religious Broadcasters convention Thursday, Feb. 26, in Nashville at the Gaylord Opryland Hotel.

Norris will be grilled by Farah about his career, faith and politics at the grand finale of the four-day international Christian media convention. Norris will also receive the prestigious NRB Chairman’s Award.

Norris first made his mark as a renowned teacher of martial arts and was a six-time undefeated World Professional Middle Weight Karate Champion. He is the first man from the Western Hemisphere in the 4,500+ year tradition of Tae Kwon Do to be awarded an eighth degree Black Belt Grand Master ranking. He has also starred in 24 motion pictures. Furthermore, his television series, “Walker, Texas Ranger,” ran for 8 1/2 years and was the most successful Saturday night series on CBS since “Gunsmoke.”

Despite the unique and impressive resume and his stature as one of the biggest global celebrities, it’s not unusual for Norris to identify himself as an exclusive weekly columnist for WND, his commentary writing home for the last eight years.

“This appearance at NRB is going to be good fun,” says Farah. “Besides his incredible careers in martial arts and in film and TV, Chuck Norris maybe best known, especially to the younger generation, for his larger-than-life ‘Chuck Norris Facts’ – the countless viral jokes that portray him as an invincible superhero. He’s truly America’s real action hero – yet a down-to-earth humble human being who can laugh about his legend status.”

Oh yeah, this is gonna be a really tough interview.

“First question, Chuck: What makes you so awesome?”

Chris Farley interviewing Paul McCartney on SNL will be tough by comparison.

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  • matty1

    NO JOKE! CHUCK NORRIS MANO A MANO WITH FARAH

    No joke? Then why is everyone laughing?

  • daved

    I particularly like the “4500+ year tradition of Tae Kwon Do.” TKD is basically Japanese shotokan karate with the serial numbers filed off. And shotokan sure isn’t anywhere near that old.

  • John Pieret

    He has also starred in 24 motion pictures.

    Funny, I’ve never sat through one of them. But, then again, wooden “acting” and mindless violence was never my thing. Norris’ major movie achievement was to make Arnold Schwarzenegger seem like Laurence Olivier by comparison.

  • kenn

    “He has also starred in 24 motion pictures.”

    And yet I couldn’t name even one of them on pain of death.

  • dugglebogey

    Not only is the event here in town, but it’s on my birthday!

  • Pierce R. Butler

    Chuck Norris to Get ‘Grilled’ by Joseph Farah

    Who will probably serve him up with those nasty little crunchy burns on the edge, while the inside remains cold and mushy.

  • Trebuchet

    Will the grilling use direct or indirect heat? Lid closed, or open? Sauce, or no sauce? Whole, or cut up first?

  • pocketnerd

    He is the first man from the Western Hemisphere in the 4,500+ year tradition of Tae Kwon Do to be awarded an eighth degree Black Belt Grand Master ranking.

    … and that might be relevant, if “black belt” meant anything to traditional taekwondo. It’s a mark of how much McDojos and martial arts fetishism have influenced western thinking on the subject that anybody can hear claims like this without snickering; claiming an “eighth degree Black Belt Grand Master ranking” in taekwondo is like saying you’ve got a Triple Crown Home Run Royal Flush ranking in soccer.

  • caseloweraz

    Farah: Chuck Norris may be best known, especially to the younger generation, for his larger-than-life ‘Chuck Norris Facts’ – the countless viral jokes that portray him as an invincible superhero.

    Um, not exactly. To borrow Jeff Cooper’s line to the combat judge in Circle of Iron, “You’ve, uh, made a mistake.”

  • howardhershey

    “Chuck Noris to Get ‘Grilled’ by Joseph Farah”

    Perhaps they will serve him as the mystery meat in some church’s McDonald’s? Or in the wafers. Might as well get some real ‘flesh’ in them.

  • http://artk.typepad.com ArtK

    NO JOKE!

    Irony meters exploded across the ‘net.

    In a rare public appearance, legendary martial arts champion and media superstar Chuck Norris will face off on stage with WND founder Joseph Farah in the climactic event of the 15th annual National Religious Broadcasters convention Thursday, Feb. 26, in Nashville at the Gaylord Opryland Hotel.

    I love (ha, ha) how they’re framing this as some major adversarial situation. Personally, I’ll only be surprised if they don’t end up verbally fellating each other.

    … an eighth degree Black Belt Grand Master ranking.

    The martial arts equivalent of a doctorate from Patriot University.

    Furthermore, his television series, “Walker, Texas Ranger,” ran for 8 1/2 years and was the most successful Saturday night series on CBS since “Gunsmoke.”

    Thereby proving H.L.Mencken and P.T.Barnum right at the same time. Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the customer born every minute.

    it’s not unusual for Norris to identify himself as an exclusive weekly columnist for WND, his commentary writing home for the last eight years.

    I hope that their copywriter didn’t sprain their arm patting themselves on the back.

    … yet a down-to-earth humble human being who can laugh about his legend status.

    Another irony meter fails. Or, perhaps [CITATION NEEDED]?

    Did someone from Comedy Central write this piece?

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    If only the grilling were along the lines of Bob in The Walking Dead.

  • John Pieret

    I’ll only be surprised if they don’t end up verbally fellating each other.

    Verbally?

  • chilidog99

    A hum job

  • Michael Heath

    Chuck Norris to Get ‘Grilled’ By Joseph Farah

    I’ll have the brain, thick-cut medium-rare. I expect it to be especially tender for a number of reasons.

  • bryanfeir

    Norris’ major movie achievement was to make Arnold Schwarzenegger seem like Laurence Olivier by comparison.

    Well, yeah. Once Schwarzenegger made enough money that he realized he could live comfortably for the rest of his life just on his investments, he started being a lot more picky about what roles he took, deliberately taking more off-beat films. Which is what gave us things like Twins, and the rather under-rated Last Action Hero where he sent up a good chunk of his own career.

    Schwarzenegger is nowhere near the self-important fool that Norris is.

  • John Pieret

    Which is what gave us things like Twins, and the rather under-rated Last Action Hero where he sent up a good chunk of his own career.

    I also thought True Lies was pretty good.

  • http://dontlinkmebro F [i’m not here, i’m gone]

    MANO A MANO

    Seriously? Mano a mano. I do not think it means what you think it means.

  • thebookofdave

    Chuck Norris to Get ‘Grilled’

    WND readers get ‘Burned’.