Beware the Sounds of Sodomy

A Christian group in Ireland is distributing an apparently completely serious pamphlet warning that allowing same-sex marriage will corrupt children by exposing them to the “sounds of sodomy.” Simon and Garfunkel could not be reached for comment. Here’s the pamphlet:

It includes questions like:

“Should children be exposed to sounds of sodomy?”

“Should children be exposed to this beastly obsession with unholy acts?”

“Should the sounds of sodomy echo in the halls of a Christian home?”

Ireland is voting on a referendum to legalize same-sex marriage in May. #SoundsofSodomy is now a very busy hashtag on Twitter, with much fun being had.

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • hunter

    Once again, the “Christian” right does more for the cause of equality than any number of lobbyists. The response in Ireland has been overwhelmingly given to giggle fits.

  • criticaldragon1177

    Ed Brayton,

    What on Earth is Sodemy supposed to sound like? And should children necessarily be exposed to the sound of heterosexual sex as well?

  • http://howlandbolton.com richardelguru

    critical

    Judging from the illustration it should sound like church bells… not inappropriate, considering the history of the RCC.

  • dingojack

    Coming to a Vatican-themed Record Bar near you: “Tubular (Cardinal) Pells”

    ‘Well worth the 800 Euros’ – Cardinal George Pell. Prefect of the Secretariat for the Economy.

    Dingo

  • StevoR

    Oh come on they really ain’t that loud!

  • anubisprime

    So much resentment in not being privy to the ‘sounds of sodomy’ they seem to have decided if they cannot have it then no one else can…

    Such a intense interest and curiosity in the sex life of teh ghey can only mean they resent being excluded from witnessing the sexual relations between them.

    Honestly they are all totally obsessed by the concept…one could conclude that they are all closet cases, it is the only explanation that might fly!

  • Abby Normal

    Wait, they think that marriage increases the frequency and volume at which couples have sex? If you want to reduce the amount of passionate gay sex going on you should be in favor of gay marriage.

  • Loqi

    “Should children be exposed to sounds of sodomy?”

    “Should children be exposed to this beastly obsession with unholy acts?”

    “Should the sounds of sodomy echo in the halls of a Christian home?”

    Reading this, I would have assumed it was an anti-Catholic pamphlet.

  • Georgia Sam

    When an opposite-sex couple commits sodomy, there’s no sound. Right?

  • criticaldragon1177

    #1. Hunter,

    Thanks for the link. Its good to know that it exploded in their faces like that.

  • dingojack

    If two straight people engage in sodomy in a forest — does it make a sound? (Apart from the Pope straining to shit).

    Koan #22.

    Dingo

  • hoku

    “Fools,” said I, “you do not know,” Silence like a cancer grows.

  • Dave Maier

    I see the pamphlet refers to the “scarament” of marriage. Somebody’s scared all right!

  • chilidog99

    I heard the sounds of sodomy once. I still can’t figure out who the Indiana father that all the yelling was about.

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    First it was “erototoxins” we had to worry about, now it’s “erotocoustics?” It can’t be worse than the sound of a kid slurping the last of his soda-pop through a straw.

    The last time we got all upset about the “sounds of sodomy,” it was from dial-a-porn phone services that kids were calling up. If that’s still what they’re upset about, they should just say so, instead of screaming gibberish and making everyone wonder whether they’re even serious.

  • justsomeguy

    @2: if you’re doing it right, it should sound like a circular saw cutting through a 2×4.

  • http://cycleninja.blogspot.com cycleninja

    I will never heard the phrase , “Hello, darkness, my old friend” in quite the same way.

  • dingojack

    Presumably they’re rejecting the Bible as an authority – since the “The words of the prophets

    Are written on the subway walls and tenement halls…”

    Dingo

  • Doug Little

    Dammit cycleninja @17 beat me to it. When I read the tagline that song immediately jumped into my head. Still “Sounds of Sodomy” would make an interesting progressive death metal band name.

  • bushrat

    I thought they were speaking out against pedophile priests that the church protects from justice…then I read the article and realized they’re just another group of clueless fundie idiots.

  • caseloweraz

    Should the sounds of sodomy echo in the halls of a Christian home?”

    That wasn’t sodomy — that was me clearing a clog in the upstairs toilet with a plunger.

    Oh, by the way: That’ll be $82.50.

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    I will never hear the phrase , “Hello, darkness, my old friend” in quite the same way.

    “Hello fifty shades of dark?”

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    See, that’s what they’re talking about — people like caseloweraz shoving their plungers down our kids’ throats! And billing their parents for it…

  • tfkreference
  • hunter

    tfkreference — Beat me to it.

  • eric

    Gotta agree with @3. The most delicious irony is that the RCC evidently thinks the ‘sounds of sodomy’ are the sounds of church bells ringing.

    “Hi foot!”

    “Uh, hi gun…whatcha doing with that trigger there?”

  • matty1

    I can’t believe no one has yet picked up on the quote “For the holy spirit will teach you in that very hour what you ought to say”

    Presumably “Oh God”

  • DaveL

    You’d think that would make them in favor of gay marriage. Trust me, nobody does silent sex better than married people with children.

  • Lofty

    I though that beds with creaky springs had gone out of fashion by now.

  • anteprepro

    The hills are aliiiiive, with the sound of sodomy

    So children of straight parents either never, ever hear those straight parents having sex.

    Or somehow sodomy is inherently eviller than vaginal sex, and children are just fine if all they hear is Penis In Vagina, which surely is the only kind of sex straight couples ever have.

    Or gay people are just allergic to doors.

    Probably that last one.

  • John Pieret

    Hello Derek, my old friend

    I’ve come to fuck with you again

    Because a Vicar softly creeping

    Left his seed in my rear end

    And the lesson that was planted

    In my brain still remains

    Within the sound of sodomy

  • dan4

    @31: “Humor” for morons and sociopaths.

  • dingojack

    Hmmm… so which of the (only) two options are you, Dan?

    What a dilemma!

    😉 Dingo

  • Kermit Sansoo

    Odd. Apparently the straight couples in Ireland with children don’t have anal sex.

  • caseloweraz

    Raging Bee: See, that’s what they’re talking about — people like caseloweraz shoving their plungers down our kids’ throats! And billing their parents for it…

    Uh-oh — they’ve found me out. Guess I’ll have to discontinue my plumbing peregrinations to the Emerald Isle.