Alex Jones: Pope to Kill a Billion People!

Alex Jones, always a calm, rational voice in any discussion, says that pope’s acceptance of anthropogenic global warming and advocacy of addressing it will KILL A BILLION PEOPLE IN THE NEXT DECADE (Run! Run away! Freak out! Nazis! Zombies! Commies!).

Conservative radio host Alex Jones accused Pope Francis on Monday of endorsing “carbon taxes and global government” following the Pope’s statements regarding climate change, saying his stance endangers the planet.

“Number one, carbon taxes will kill a billion people over a decade,” Jones said. “If you cut off energy to the world over 10 years it’ll kill off a billion people or more. [President Barack] Obama’s told them, you can’t have cars, you can’t have air conditioning, you can’t have medicine, you can’t have anything.”

Yeah, I’m sure Obama told “them” (whoever the fuck them is) exactly that. He did right after meeting with his alien overlords and revealing that he’s a reptilian.

httpv://youtu.be/43GL4vUc0zA

POPULAR AT PATHEOS Nonreligious
What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Sastra

    Given his stance on birth control the pope is more likely to cause a billion people in the next decade.

  • http://howlandbolton.com richardelguru

    Sastra: so that’s a wash then!

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Only a billion? What, is the pope still back on Agenda 17? Come on, get with the times!

  • http://www.pandasthumb.org Area Man

    Run! Run away! Freak out! Nazis! Zombies! Commies!.

    Catholics!

  • Reginald Selkirk

    Ironically, killing 1/7 of the human population might address the problem of CO2- induced climate change more effectively than anything Alex Jones would suggest.

  • anubisprime

    Bit of a blow for those members of the GOP that dance to the RCC beat.

    Now the majority that scoff at AGW are officially at odds with their own top doggy ju ju man…does this mean they are all going to hell?…the curious have a right to know!

    Seeing as it is tradition that the pope is inherently infallible..there is no way out for them they are obviously doomed…oh dear, how sad, never mind!

    Does anyone with even a couple of brain cells actually believe Alex, would it not be a kindness of the American public to demand he receive intensive therapy, preferably in a secure institution…however long it might take?

    Or is he viewed as the clown general of the US of A, a bit of light entertainment before the rapture arrives?

    That fool probably has several gun and rifle permits, makes one feel real safe does it not?

  • caseloweraz

    “Number one, carbon taxes will kill a billion people over a decade,” Jones said. “If you cut off energy to the world over 10 years it’ll kill off a billion people or more.

    I guess that would be the billion people left after Obama gets done killing his 6.2 billion, amirite?

    Looks like it’s pretty much curtains for our species. Let’s all sing a chorus of “So long, it’s Been Good To Know Ya” as we go gentle into that good night.

  • caseloweraz

    [President Barack] Obama’s told them, you can’t have cars, you can’t have air conditioning, you can’t have medicine, you can’t have anything.”

    Speaking of singing, we could put that to a popular tune…

    We, can’t have happy hours,

    And we, can’t have fond desires;

    We — can’t have anything

    Since Obama came through….

  • raven

    Given his stance on birth control the pope is more likely to cause a billion people in the next decade.

    It’s part of the Catholic recycling program. This is a progressive Pope. They recycle souls.

    People are born. They soon die. But they are now in heaven so it doesn’t matter.

  • wreck

    “Pope to Kill a Billion People”

    I assume the young boys will be spared.

  • howardhershey

    Wait a minute. How many of the earth’s billions have cars, air conditioning, and medicine now? Talk about thinking that everyone is like him.

  • Michael Heath

    President Obama in last night’s SOTU speech:

    2014 was the planet’s warmest year on record. Now, one year doesn’t make a trend, but this does: 14 of the 15 warmest years on record have all fallen in the first 15 years of this century.

    Two cringe-worthy statements given the president’s failure to properly frame the period referenced. In a perfect world this would be overlooked, instead I bet the denialists are looking to shift attention to this ‘splinter’ in Obama’s eye as a red herring to avoid confronting the redwood trunk in their collective eye.

    President Obama in that same speech:

    . . . the best scientists in the world are all telling us that our activities are changing the climate, and if we don’t act forcefully, we’ll continue to see rising oceans, longer, hotter heat waves, dangerous droughts and floods, and massive disruptions that can trigger greater migration and conflict and hunger around the globe.

    It’s disappointing that the president failed to refer to “ocean acidification*” and an increase in extinction rates.

    I would be very interested in hearing the story on how the global warming portion of this speech was developed. I realize President Obama’s talking to a population of ignoramuses and ignorant denialists, most of whom have a difficult time seeing beyond the self-interests of them and their ideological tribe, but still . . . I continue to observe an incredibly critical topic get communicated in a way that would have a PR person fired at even a mid-cap corporation.

    *Pedantically, a decrease in the alkalinity of the oceans.

  • Michael Heath

    Reginal Selkirk:

    Ironically, killing 1/7 of the human population might address the problem of CO2- induced climate change more effectively than anything Alex Jones would suggest.

    The population most vulnerable to suffering due to climate change is the poorest of the poor in certain parts of the world. These groups are not significant CO2 and CH4 emitters.

  • Seth

    Journalists are so fucking lazy; Alex Jones is somehow a “conservative” because he, what, screams incoherently about Barack Obama? Ten fucking years ago he was screaming incoherently about George Bush, and was commonly regarded at the time as a far-left nutjob (and was probably referred to as a “liberal” in some news outlets) for his stance on 9/11 being an inside job.

    Alex Jones is not a political animal. He is a con-man dressing himself up as a reactionary, and making a fucking killing doing it.

  • StevoR

    Alex Jones: Pope to Kill a Billion People!

    What, just by himself with his own hands? That’ll take ‘im awhile!

    “Number one, carbon taxes will kill a billion people over a decade,” Jones said.

    Um, how precisely? How will taxing carbon (dioxide & other GHG emissions) actually kill anyone do tell?

    Obama’s told them, you can’t have cars, you can’t have air conditioning, you can’t have medicine, you can’t have anything.”

    Saying citation badly needed for that one surely wins the understatement of the century award don’t it?

  • mildlymagnificent

    Reginald Selkirk @5

    Ironically, killing 1/7 of the human population might address the problem of CO2- induced climate change more effectively than anything Alex Jones would suggest.

    Only if they’re excessive producers of ghgs. That would be my lot in Australia, then Canada and the US along with most of Europe and a portion of China. Killing off a billion impoverished people from the remote regions of Africa and Asia would have very little impact on total emissions.

    Michael Heath said something similar, but it’s worth drumming it in.

  • dingojack

    Alex Jones: Pope to Kill a Billion People!

    What, personally? Come the 15 March this year he’ll have been in the job two years already without so much as a stabbing. A billion people in the remaining eight years is about one every quarter of a second. Quick sticks, Frankie-boy!

    @@ Dingo

  • Pierce R. Butler

    How come Alex Jones and Bill Maher never have each other on their shows?

  • Michael Heath

    Pierce R. Butler writes:

    How come Alex Jones and Bill Maher never have each other on their shows?

    How come Sarah Palin and Fareed Zakaria never have each other on their shows?