Cahn: God Will Punish Us for Marriage Equality

Jonathan Cahn, the messianic rabbi — read: Christian preacher — so beloved by the Worldnetdaily, told Joseph Farah in an interview that if the Supreme Court strikes down state bans on same-sex marriage, God will punish America just like he allegedly did after Roe v Wade:

Cahn, a messianic rabbi who has linked gay rights to the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks, fascism and the End Times, told WorldNetDaily editor Joseph Farah in an interview at the National Religious Broadcasters convention posted online today that the court could usher in a series of divine punishments just as it did with the 1973 ruling on abortion rights, Roe v. Wade.

“Within one month of Roe v. Wade, that Supreme Court decision with abortion, the financial realm collapsed, led to a global recession, the same year America lost its first war in modern history or ever in Vietnam,” he said.

He added that the upcoming marriage case is “a very cataclysmic, moral, spiritual thing. What’s that going to do in the rest of the realm? Well I believe it is all coming together.”

Oh yes, we lost Vietnam because of Roe v Wade. It happened magically, out of the blue. We were doing great from 1964 to 1973, kicking ass and taking names and then suddenly, with no warning at all, we lost because God decided we were lost. This isn’t just post hoc reasoning, it’s idiotic on its face. The same is true of the economy, of course. Recessions don’t happen out of the blue, they result from a virtually infinite number of decisions and reactions over the course of years.

This argument is just so ridiculous. “You did something my god didn’t like, so he kicked your ass and anything bad that happened after you did it is proof of that. You just didn’t know he was doing it.” Brilliant.

httpv://youtu.be/gA6txm8QTtc

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  • John Pieret

    Where, exactly, in the Bible does it say “post hoc, ergo propter hoc”?

  • Taz

    Oh yes, we lost Vietnam because of Roe v Wade. It happened magically, out of the blue. We were doing great from 1964 to 1973, kicking ass and taking names and then suddenly. . .

    . . .Rove v Wade pissed off Dr Manhattan so much he up and left the planet.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    He’s got a point. Everything was going swimmingly in America in the early 1970s, then Roe v Wade was decided on January 22, 1973 and the very next day the Yom Kipper War started (Israel’s neigbors were waiting for the decision before they moved), leading to the Arab oil embargo, financial turmoil and Carter, and the day after that the Tet Offensive cost us Vietnam.

  • eric

    So, without Roe v Wade, we would have never left Vietnam and we’d still be sending our troops there to be shot at? Sounds like it lifted a curse instead of causing one.

  • theguy

    “Within one month of Roe v. Wade, that Supreme Court decision with abortion, the financial realm collapsed, led to a global recession, the same year America lost its first war in modern history or ever in Vietnam”

    Some people don’t understand how economics work, so they choose to believe in trickle-down tax cuts. Cahn (KAAAHHN!!) chooses to trek further into stupid here. Why would God’s punishment for abortion in one country lead to a global recession?

    I know people always use that Bible verse about the rain falling on the just and unjust, but that doesn’t justify shit.

  • marcus

    Yes, better planning, logistics, determination, and home field advantage had nothing at all to do with it!

    It was God, pissed at Roe v Wade. Funny that he would support the godless Communists over us but… mysterious ways and all that.

  • raven

    I wouldn’t worry about it.

    God’s aim is notoriously bad. Someone else is going to get it.

  • raven

    The 21st century hasn’t been so great.

    We’ve had 9/11, the War in Aghanistan, Iraq War II, George Bush elected twice, The Great Wall Street Crash, the Great Recession, Sandy Hook school shooting, New Orleans and the NE flooded by hurricanes, and the rise of the Tea Party. Among other disasters

    I would ask Rabbi Cahn or Farah, what we did to deserve these punishments from his gods.

    But won’t get a coherent answer.

    Hmmm, how about the War of 1812, Civil War, Great Depression, WW I or WW II. Seems like god is perpetually angry with us for something or other. Or Our Father in Heaven is an abusive monster.

  • anubisprime

    The lower the IQ the more bizzaro the claims made in gods name…they seem to lose the ability to string a cogent and cohesive tale together…it always starts fuckin’ batshit insane…and nominally the ‘rationale’ becomes ever more unintelligible towards the end!

    Waiting patiently here for a response, in no doubt similar vein, from the good ‘ole’ RCC.

    Cannot wait for the hilarity to commence, they have a few star cardinals with out which the whole magisterium would be boring….or at least more then they manage at the moment.

    The risible clowns seem to be keeping their powder dry for the moment…so it must be a doozy…or at the very least they think it is!

    Guaranteed fatuous and complete with the ‘not so veiled’ threats to all and sundry will be a wonder of twisted bitterness…awesome!

  • http://festeringscabofrealityblogspot.com fifthdentist

    I don’t know about Vietnam and the 1970s economic meltdown, but I believe some really angry and malevolent supernatural beings must have been behind the leisure suit, disco and the Archie’s Saturday TV cartoons.

  • sigurd jorsalfar

    He’s got a point. Gay marriage has been legal in Canada for about a decade now. And look what’s happened to Canada.

  • shouldbeworking

    Re: # 11

    You’re correct. Since gay marriage became legal in Canada, Ted Cruz was elected to the Senate, tornadoes and hurricanes have struck the US, the World Trade Centre, the War in Afghanistan & Iraq, and the Tea Party.

    Does Obamacare cover eyeglasses for mythical sky magicians?

  • dingojack

    Yeah, god was so pissed he let George Forman defeat Joe Frazier to become world heavy-weight champion, the following day he let the crew of Apollo 17 address Congress, the day after that Nixon announced the peace accord ending the ten+ years of the Vietnam War and on 6 February god allows construction of the CN tower in Toronto to commence…

    @@

    Dingo

  • StevoR

    @ sigurd jorsalfar : “He’s got a point. Gay marriage has been legal in Canada for about a decade now. And look what’s happened to Canada.”

    Also legal in quite a few US states too -and how are they doing now especially relative to the most homophobic ones eh?

    Hint : The answer is almost always the equal marriage states are doing much better by almost all indicators of prosperity, happiness, etc ..