Wingnut Pastor: Beware the Gay Muslim Secular Humanist Caliphate

Ken Graves, a dominionist pastor from Bangor, Maine, gave a rousing sermon at Liberty Counsel’s Awakenings conference this weekend, claiming that gay people and secular humanists are in league with those reactionary Muslims who want to murder them in order to establish a caliphate.

“We find ourselves — in all honesty, when we’re being honest, we are conscious that militant homofascism seeks to take over our land and make it Sodom,” Graves bellowed.

“We are also conscious that militant Islam truthfully wants to establish a worldwide caliphate,” he continued. “They want to destroy everything that we have, and complicit with them is the secularist — it is the secular humanist fundamentalist extremists. They want to make this their sort of secular humanist caliphate.”

Graves said it was only natural that Christian conservatives should feel intimidated by such an existential threat.

“They have every major institution, that they have, in fact, taken control of entertainment, they have taken control of education, they’ve had massive gains in recent decades,” he said. “This we must acknowledge.”

Yes, yes, yes. And then you must acknowledge that the Rebel Alliance, the Emperor and the Ewoks are engaged in a grand conspiracy to destroy Jar Jar Binks (and who can blame them?). But don’t take my word for it, listen to him shout it very loudly.

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  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    If I had not seen the video, I would assumed I was hearing a voice actor in a cartoon. Most likely a leader of the bad guys in some anime. I keep waiting for him to order the release of the Robeast, and destroy Voltron.

  • wreck

    “in all honesty, when we’re being honest”

    Wake me up when that happens.

    “We are also conscious that militant Islam truthfully wants to establish a worldwide caliphate,” he continued. “They want to destroy everything that we have, and complicit with them is the secularist — it is the secular humanist fundamentalist extremists. They want to make this their sort of secular humanist caliphate.”

    And make square circles.

  • John Pieret

    All I know is that, as a secular humanist, my fondest hope is that ISIS takes over the US and kills me and everyone I love and respect because … LIBERALISM!!!!

  • http://dharmaubuntu.wordpress.com/ Aspect Sign

    I had assumed that this guy would be just another crazy but then I heard how loudly and authoritatively he spoke. Plainly he knows what he is talking about. I’m headed out now to buy a gun and a bible and it sounds like I am just in time!

  • tbp1

    “hot ice and wondrous strange snow.”

  • Larry

    Because what secular humanist could resist a Muslim caliphate over a christian theocracy. And making it a gay one only adds to the spiciness.

  • John Pieret

    theschaw @ 1:

    If I had not seen the video, I would assumed I was hearing a voice actor in a cartoon. Most likely a leader of the bad guys in some anime.

    No need to go so far afield … think Yosemite Sam!

  • John Pieret

    the shhwa @ 1: Sorry about the typo as to your nym.

  • Pierce R. Butler

    How long has it been since these guys stopped calling us tree-hugging flower-bedecked Druids?

    We can’t neglect our environmental priorities so much!

  • llewelly

    This is the good thing about believing in Satan. You can believe all your enemies are working together, because Satan is leading them all!

  • grumpyoldfart

    The cheering started as soon as he referred to the bible as “a sharp, double-edged sword.” (Bloody warmongers)

  • caseloweraz

    Ken Graves: “They have every major institution…”

    I guess the church is no longer a major institution. Hard cheese for K.G.

  • lldayo

    A gay, Muslim caliphate would truly be entertaining for the world to watch. I welcome it.

  • John Hinkle

    This guy must’ve been the Awakener at the Awakenings conference.

  • blf

    Has this Shouty Wingnut any idea what any of the words Gay, Muslim, Secular, Humanist, or Caliphate mean? In either English or wingnutcrayola?

  • Sastra

    At the end he says that Christians need not be afraid because they have the Bible, and it is a double-edged sword. If he meant that metaphorically I think he missed the implication that, like a double-edged sword, the Bible can be used against as well as for pretty much anything.

    And if he meant it literally … then he shouldn’t grip it so tightly between his hands.

  • busterggi

    I guess Pinky symbolized secular humanists while the Brain symbolized militant Islam.

  • Nick Gotts

    I for one welcome our new gay Muslim secular humanist fundamentalist extremist overlords!