Duck Dynasty Douchebag: Liberals Worse Than Hitler, Stalin

In astonishingly shocking news, the patriarch of America’s dumbest family, the Duck Dynasty dingbats, said something incredibly stupid. This is a repeat from every day for the last few years. This time he claims that liberals are worse than Hitler and Stalin because they do Satan’s bidding.

I gave you four ideologies in the last one hundred years, I see a pattern. You say, ‘why do they do what they do, why is there always murder?’ You know what the scary thing is? The fifth ideology right in behind all of this bunch of stuff we’re dealing with now, has its roots in the United States of America? You know how many they’ve killed? You say, ‘who are they?’ People call them left-wing loons, Bill O’Reilly calls them, political correct crowd, orthodox liberal opinion. You say, ‘what are they famous for?’ They’ve killed 63 million of their own children. 63 million. More than Hitler, more than Stalin. We’re slaughtering ourselves. You say, ‘who is behind it?’ Their father is, he was a murderer, from the beginning, they are slaves to sin, they are controlled by the Evil One. Duh.

Any Jesus with them? No, no. They don’t want Biblical correctness, no siree, they will not touch this, they are trying to get around it, they want political correctness. Well, what is it? What is political correctness? Orthodox liberal opinion in matters of sexuality, race, gender. They’re arguing and debating is there a difference between a male and a female? I’m like, dude, go in the bathroom, take your clothes off and take a look, you’ll figure it out.

Satan was a murderer from the beginning not holding to the truth so there’s no truth in him, when he lies — am I dreaming? Have you ever heard this many lies coming out of Washington D.C. since you’ve been on the earth? Have you ever heard more? You say where in the world is it coming from? They champion perversion, they champion murder, aborting their children and they are champions of lies. I mean I’m listening to them and thinking, ‘dude, what?’

‘Yeah, this bunch here, they’re the kind that clings to their guns and their bibles,’ I’m thinking, yeah, we may need them. How in tarnation do you think we ran the Brits back to where they came from back there 240 years ago? It took guns and it took bibles, right? You better stay with what brought you. He was a murderer from the beginning, there’s no truth in him and when he lies he speaks his native language, the relationship between these guys and Satan. He is a liar and the Father of Lies.

And this fuckwit is a rock star on the right wing. A goddamn rock star.

"While in the Army, I was accused of having a bad attitude a couple of ..."

Looks Like Flynn Has Flipped on ..."
"I wouldn't give them credit if I was a payday loan-shark."

Pastor: Moore Liked Young Girls Because ..."

Browse Our Archives

Follow Us!


What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • keithb

    I know it would make their heads explode, but these guys should really read Tuchman’s _March of Folly_ and _The first Salute_. A few relatively small concessions on either side could have resolved the Revolutionary War. If she is to be believed, it was Guns, the French and Woodenheadedness that drove the British out. Bibles had nothing to do with it.

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    “It took guns and it took bibles, right?”

    I remember reading in history class about how the colonists used to tape together bibles and make armor to stop the redcoats’ musket balls and cannonballs from killing and maiming them. It was so clever! Or when they wrapped their ships in bibles for the same reason. Who has not gone to the naval museum to marvel at “Ol’ Biblesides”.

  • wreck

    “Satan was a murderer from the beginning”

    According to the bible, Satan killed 10 people. God killed millions. Given the choice between the two imaginary beings, who looks like the biggest monster Phil?

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    @ wreck (#3). I gotta go with God. When Satan kills, it is murder. When God kills, it is divine judgment, because shut up!, that’s why.

    It is kind of like when a cop kills an unarmed person, it is not murder.

  • scienceavenger

    They’re arguing and debating is there a difference between a male and a female? I’m like, dude, go in the bathroom, take your clothes off and take a look, you’ll figure it out.

    This illustrates the our-way-or-no-way view such people have of the world. Question some traditional morality? Then anything goes. Question some traditionally-defined gender characteristics? Then you don’t know the difference between a penis and a vagina. It also exposes 1) that they haven’t been anywhere in the world, or they’d know there are many different moralities and ways of doing things, and 2) They really think the rest of us are as stupid as they are.

  • Saad

    Voltaire, can you please stop praying? This is just too much!

  • scienceavenger

    How in tarnation do you think we ran the Brits back to where they came from back there 240 years ago? It took guns and it took bibles, right?

    Shades of the witch doctor who insists both arsenic and the magic spell are required to kill.

    And hey doofus, it was the French, not the Bibles, that helped us run the Brits back. You know, these dirty commie liberal sinful French. Shove that up your ass and see if you can light it.

  • http://kamakanui.zenfolio.com Kamaka

    This blathering bullyboy is a fucking case study of *acquired situational narcissism*, bloated with unearned self-importance.

  • anubisprime

    What a complete fuckin’ dickhead…

    How can so much fear, paranoia. ignorance and crass stupidity be squeezed into such a small brain?

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    How in tarnation do you think we ran the Brits back to where they came from back there 240 years ago? It took guns and it took bibles, right?

    Thank God Britain didn’t have guns and bibles. Also, thank God Britain smithed a bunch of the guns and printed a bunch of the bibles with which the American Revolutionaries won the revolution.

  • Hoosier X

    So if only the British had had Christianity and firearms, they would have won the American Revolution.

    Good to know.

  • k_machine

    It always gets me when someone claims the US is worse than Nazi Germany. So if Ecuador and Nicaragua, where abortion is banned full-stop, were to level Boston with bombs Dresden-style, would Phil be OK with that?

  • Trebuchet

    40 years ago, guys like him were murdering guys for looking like him. The more things change, the more they remain the same.

  • teawithbertrand

    I’m beginning to think that all of the appalling garbage that comes out of this guy’s mouth is just theater of the absurd, as phony and contrived as the rest of him. He’s an actor playing a role, both on and off his TV show, pandering to the worst sort of hateful idiot and trolling the rest of us for fun. Either that, or he’s one of the most despicable public figures alive right now.

    Nice that he’s trying to bring back “tarnation”, though.

  • busterggi

    That’s it, Phil Robertson has gone and turned into ‘Phil Robertson’, the image has become the person.

  • theguy

    “They’ve killed 63 million of their own children. 63 million. More than Hitler, more than Stalin. We’re slaughtering ourselves”

    I bet* it’s mostly tea baggers having abortions. We know how to use condoms and birth control.

    *Wanna take that bet, Douchbag Dy-nasty?

    “No, no. They don’t want Biblical correctness [the correct way to slaughter people] no siree, they will not touch this, they are trying to get around it, they want political [moral] correctness.”

    And by moral I mean liberal, not some fundy hypocrite telling grown-ass men to marry teenage girls, like Robertshit.

    “Have you ever heard this many lies coming out of Washington D.C. since you’ve been on the earth?”

    Are you admitting that the Tea Party lies? Lies about poor people, gays, Muslims, atheists, Mexicans, global warming, evolution, WMD in Iraq, torture, and everything else you could possibly imagine? If there really is a “Father of Lies” his business card says “Tea Party Patriot.”

    “Have you ever heard more? You say where in the world is it coming from? They champion perversion, they champion murder”

    Look who’s talking, you diseased piece of shit with your own perverted fantasies about murdering atheists.

    “they’re the kind that clings to their guns and their bibles,’ I’m thinking, yeah, we may need them”

    Sounds like Duck Fuck is planning his own little Final Solution. Hey, Robershit, if you think you’re so honest, just admit it!

    “How in tarnation do you think we ran the Brits back to where they came from back there 240 years ago? It took guns and it took bibles, right?”

    It took an organized militia, and the French and Spanish. The British had guns and bibles, too. IIRC, only about 5% of the colonists regularly attended church before the Revolution.

    Just when I thought there couldn’t be any drooling, snarling wingnuts more degenerate than Fischsticks.

  • http://www.pandasthumb.org Area Man

    Satan was a murderer from the beginning not holding to the truth so there’s no truth in him, when he lies — am I dreaming?

    I’m wondering what this would mean if translated into English.

  • marcus

    As i understand it, saying that the French helped us beat the British is like a 10-year-old saying “Daddy helped me kill the bear.”

    Guns certainly helped. Bibles? Not so much.