Klingenschmitt Underestimates the Power of The Gay

Gordon Klingenschmitt said he was suspending his show for six weeks, but that didn’t stop him from uploading a new one on Thursday. On that video, he claimed that gays are actively recruiting your children and that within 100 years they’ll succeed in turning 20% of the population gay.

“The disparity in the population proves to me that it is a recruitment effort for your children,” Klingenschmitt continued. “And thank God they’re resisting that in Alabama. I wish the rest of America would protect their children as well as they do in Alabama, which is why they have a lower percentage of children recruited, according to the Gallup poll, in the state of Alabama.”

Klingenschmitt then went on to warn that children raised in same-sex households are more likely to be gay, which is further proof that children are being recruited, meaning that “in a hundred years, if we continue to allow this recruiting effort across America, all of the children in all of the public schools, if we don’t stop this, will be re-educated that this is a good thing.”

“And I predict in a hundred years,” he said, “twenty percent of Americans could become homosexual.”

A hundred years? Only 20%? Oh Gordon, you aren’t even close. Clearly you don’t don’t understand the true power of the FEMA concentration/reeducation camps that are being developed at a secret base by the ghost of Saul Alinsky. Once we get all the Christians rounded up, we’ll turn them all gay. Hell, I predict that we’ll have you sucking cock like a pro within two years.

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  • John Pieret

    I predict that we’ll have you sucking cock like a pro within two years.

    Yeah, but who’d want his cock sucked by Gordo?

  • Thomas Everett

    I’m guessing by his obsession with sodomy, he is already a professional level cock sucker.

  • raven

    On that video, he claimed that gays are actively recruiting your children …

    1. Who are actively recruiting your children are fundie xians. They make no secret of it.

    2. A rather ugly group of fundie xians called Child Evangelism Fellowship targets grade school age kids in grade schools. These guys are so cuckoo even most xians don’t like them.

    3. They are widespread in the USA.

    They are active in my area for Cthulhu’s sake.

    4. And, they are after YOUR kids!!!

    Parents be alert to the signs of Fundie Xian Induced Cognitive Impairment. If your grade school kid announces one day that the universe is 6,000 years old and you are going to hell for being a normal person, seek professional help immediately.

    Without eternal vigilance, it can happen to your family.

  • raven

    wikipedia Child Evangelism Fellowship:

    CEF was instrumental in the founding of the modern child evangelism movement which focuses on the 4/14 Window.

    The primary ministries of CEF are the ‘Good News Club’ and the ‘5-Day Club’. Both of these programs involve training members from various evangelical churches to effectively teach children in homes, neighborhood centers and schools. On June 11, 2001 the USA Supreme Court ruled in favor of allowing Good News Clubs to meet in public elementary schools after school hours, based on equal access and protection from viewpoint discrimination. Since that time CEF has been working to establish Good News Clubs in public schools around the USA. Currently, there are Good News Clubs in over 3000 public elementary schools.[citation needed]

    The 4/14 window refers to the ages at which brainwashing and indoctrination are most effective.

    CEF has 2,000 paid employees and 40,000 volunteers. All of whom are after your kids.

  • dingojack

    John Pieret (#1) – at least you’d not have to see his face. (Small mercies, and all that).

    Dingo

  • anubisprime

    Summat’ smells rank here…was not jeebus supposed to arrive like any day now?

    That rapture is in the xtian agenda under imminent apparently…so what has a century got to do with it all…the folks he harangues will all most likely be a pluckin’ harps on some cloud somewhere and the rest of society dead meat cos they ain’t been raptured…so what the fuck is klingonshit’ flappin’ his jaws about?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=730511544 billdaniels

    Let’s get this straight. Ooops, wrong choice of words. We, your Future Gay Overlords, are not interested in all of your children. We only want the hot, sexy ones. Gordo has nothing to worry about. Neither do most back-woods, toothless rednecks. We are targeting the the suave, urbane, educated boys and girls who can spot the difference between Versace and Ralph Lauren at 100 yards. The ones who hum opera arias in the shower.

    Wait, I think those are the one we’ve already recruited. I’m all worn out from having to plan and prepare brunch for all of the potential gay kids in the local tri-county area. I need a nap.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Only 20% in a century? A pathetic statistic like that is what happens when lunch starts at 10:30, homos!

  • theguy

    “I wish the rest of America would protect their children as well as they do in Alabama”

    Which is why Talibama has such a low rate of child poverty and uninsured children. Oh wait, it’s one of the highest? Well fuck me.

  • donkensler

    Although if you get to the redneck boys early enough I’m sure they’re trainable. Some of them are really hot as teenagers!

  • grumpyoldfart

    Klingenschmitt can make thousands of dollars with simple statements like that. He’s not even slightly worried about atheists or gays taking the children. He knows it will never happen. He’s just after the money – and quite happy with the results so far.

  • Scientismist

    “The disparity in the population proves to me that it is a recruitment effort for your children,”

    I was puzzled by that statement — what disparity in what population?

    From the original article:

    Saying that the 2010 census found that less than one percent of the population was gay whereas now it is up to around three percent, Klingenschmitt warned that the gay population is growing, especially in areas of the country “where they don’t believe the Bible,” through the recruitment of children.

    Aha, so he means the disparity in estimated numbers of gay people over time. Actually, the size of the gay population is hard to measure, because it depends on self-assessment and willingness to self-identify, which is fluid and influenced by social pressures — he’s right about that. But that doesn’t mean that “recruitment” works; just that, even with all the improvements in public attitudes, it’s still hard to get people to publicly identify with a minority that Christian politicians like Klingenschmitt (and just last week US Senator Tom Cotton) have made it quite clear they wouldn’t mind seeing exterminated.

    I don’t recall seeing the box to check for sexual orientation on the census forms, nor hearing of any penalties for failure to disclose that information. One percent is far too low; more believable current estimates hover around seven percent. Why isn’t he cheered by the fact that both that and his own favored number of 3% are lower than Masters and Johnson’s mid-20th century estimate (guess) of 10%?

    And those who will cop to having experienced at least some same-sex attraction, if not activity, can be as high as 20%; so Gordon’s worst fears may already be close to the truth of the matter. Be afraid, be very afraid! (Especially out here on the left coast).

  • david

    “I wish the rest of America would protect their children as well as they do in Alabama, which is why they have a lower percentage of children recruited, according to the Gallup poll, in the state of Alabama.”

    Gallup polls measure self-defined status.

    A quick web search shows that Alabama ranks 9th in terms of fraction of population that downloads gay porn (first three: MS, LA, GA).

    Currently, about 5% of the AL population downloads gay porn. So to get the extra 15%, the recruiters had better get busy.

  • moarscienceplz

    With 7 billion people on the planet, I think it would be great if about 6 billion of them turned gay.

  • Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden

    @David, #13:

    Remember that not that many dykes download gay porn (though some do) and not all gay men download/watch gay porn. Since men are roughly 50% of the population, we’re probably already near 10%. We only need an another 10%, not another 15%.

  • raven

    Saying that the 2010 census found that less than one percent of the population was gay whereas now it is up to around three percent, Klingenschmitt …

    This is just a really stupid lie.

    We’ve already been through this once on FTB’s and Ed Brayton a day or so ago.

    The US census hass never asked any questions about sexual orientation. It doesn’t even ask what religion you are. These numbers are just made up.

    C’mon people. You don’t really think Klingenshmitt ever reads anything or tells the truth?

  • raven

    Does the LGBT community count? Not on the census

    newsarchive.medill.northwestern.edu/chicago/news.aspx?id=214775

    Jan 30, 2013 – American Community Survey questions that collect information on …

    The census surveys don’t collect information on sexual orientation …

    I see this a whole lot on Freethoughblogs. People who don’t know what Google is. Or what a lie is either.

    1. Fundie xians lie. It’s lies on top of lies based on an ancient book of mostly fiction.

    2. Including what you were told in Sunday school or your church, even if they weren’t fundie.

    3. If xians say somethiing is in the bible, it probably isn’t. If they quote bible verses, they are usually taken out of context or mean something totally different.

    4. Xian’s religious beliefs evolve and change rapidly. In fact, they can change in an hour and change back an hour after that. Beliefs not anchored in reality are very malleable.

  • lorn

    All other things being equal, Gordon Klingenschmitt does seem to spend a lot of time thinking about gay sex. A whole lot of time.

  • matty1

    Re 17: People who don’t know what a lie is. I think the difference between a lie and an error is whether the person telling it knows that what they are saying is untrue. I’m not convinced that the majority of Christians who repeat untruths do know they are untrue, many of the leaders yes, but if the entire religion is comprised of people repeating what they consciously know to be false it raises the question of what they get out of it.

  • raven

    but if the entire religion is comprised of people repeating what they consciously know to be false it raises the question of what they get out of it.

    It’s not so much that they don’t know what truth is or a lie is. It’s that they don’t know what the difference is and don’t care.

    Xianity like all religions has a major flaw. They don’t reality test. If they did, they wouldn’t exist.

    But some lies are so obvious and so easily refuted, that they have to know on some level that they are just lying or extremely stupid and crazy. Klingenschmitt is one of those. The US census has never and does not ask about sexual orientation.

  • matty1

    I suppose I may be too sympathetic, I tend to see the sheeple in the pews as to some extent the victims taken in by the likes of Klingenschmitt rather than co-conspirators.

  • Nice Ogress

    As someone who had wide exposure to lots of religions as a kid, my experience is the untruths don’t register as lies at all. Remember that prayer is a thing wherein you tell (the deity of your choice) the things you’d like to happen, and (the deity of your choice) then GOES OUT AND ALTERS REALITY so it conforms with your prayer. This is how reality works when you’re a religious kid. Don’t like how things are? Lie about them! See if they change! This kind of ‘unofficial praying’ is constant and of course gets much more positive reinforcement than negative – unless you’re caught. Then you’re punished, so you learn to conceal it. By the time you’re an adult, you’ve concealed your constant lying (remember, they’re prayers to your deity all unofficial-like) so well you don’t even remember you’re doing it.

    Wishful thinking: how powerless people change the world without, y’know, doing anything.

  • http://www.holytape.etsy.com holytape

    Twenty Percent by 2115? Challenge accepted. I’m not gay, but do plan to live for a very long time and like a good goal.

  • raven

    Wishful thinking: how powerless people change the world without, y’know, doing anything.

    If you say something is true, then it becomes true. This is known as magical thinking.

    Whatever. You can make excuses for these people all you want. I’m just going to call untruths, factually incorrect statements, what they are…lies.

  • Michael Heath

    matty1 writes:

    I think the difference between a lie and an error is whether the person telling it knows that what they are saying is untrue. I’m not convinced that the majority of Christians who repeat untruths do know they are untrue, many of the leaders yes, but if the entire religion is comprised of people repeating what they consciously know to be false it raises the question of what they get out of it.

    I promote a tougher standard. I think a person’s lying when they present a premise as if it’s true when they never bothered to validate its veracity. That where their premise is not an empirically and independently validated fact by the relevant experts.

    This standard collects all those lies Christians abuse children with by framing them as fact; e.g., “Jesus loves you”, “You’ll go to Hell if you don’t submit”, “Jesus is God”, “God healed me”, “God is watching you and knows everything you do and think”, etc., etc., etc. Of course there are many examples in the public policy realm as well.

    I don’t find it at all difficult to remain honest using this tougher standard. So I have no tolerance for those that lie by conflating their beliefs as fact.