NOM March to Feature Man Who Can Cure The Gay by Laying On Hands

Alvin McEwen reports that this weekend’s annual March for Marriage, organized by the National Organization for Marriage, will feature a preacher named Brandon Porter who famously claimed to have healed a man of The Gay just by laying his hands on him (not in that way, you pervert) and praying for him. In fact, it’s all on video:

And guess what? That “delivered” man later said he’s still gay. Imagine that. But the preacher will be speaking at the March for Marriage, where a few hundred people show up every year to give a golf clap for a procession of bigots and halfwits.

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  • Chiroptera

    Well, to be fair, that is more scientific that “gay conversion therapy.”

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Chiroptera “Well, to be fair, that is more scientific that “gay conversion therapy.”

    Well, to be fair, Gay Conversion Therapy has come a long way. The biggest hurdle was realizing that gays are metric. That’s why their truck nuts have ten balls.

  • blf

    Well, to be fair, that is more scientific that “gay conversion therapy.”

    So is eating walruses until the stack of turtles collapses from all the extra weight.

  • eric

    But remember, it’s a choice not a medical condition.

  • John Pieret

    that is more scientific that “gay conversion therapy.”

    Yeah, but if God can’t cure the gay, what chance does a psychologist have?

  • grumpyoldfart

    I had to laugh at the 1’00” mark when the gay started doing a little jig. The preacher nearly shit himself. It was as if he was thinking , “Oh no, the silly bastard’s not going to start mincing is he?” That’s when the preacher quickly headed off in the opposite direction, trying to divert attention away from the gay, and onto himself.

  • busterggi

    Laying on of hands is a requirement for curing the gay, lip service isn’t enough.

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    And guess what? That “delivered” man later said he’s still gay. Imagine that.

    This is not a failure. It was intentional. This preacher learned from Big Pharma that treatment is more profitable than a cure. Now this “lost soul” has to come back to church every few weeks to get re-straightened. And if he should give a donation each visit…

  • http://festeringscabofrealityblogspot.com fifthdentist

    And did he also let his rod and his staff comfort the ex-gay?

  • Pierce R. Butler

    Y’all don’t understand: it was a distress signal, because he flew it upside down!

  • Pierce R. Butler

    Oops – my # 10 belongs in the previous thread – pls disregard!

  • 0nlythis

    His 7 minutes of fame and the preacher steals his glory.

  • peterh

    “…where a few hundred people show up every year to give a golf clap for a procession of bigots and halfwits.”

    And this differs from other churches just how . . . . . ?

  • matty1

    @13 the main difference from other churches would be only doing it every year instead of every week

  • anubisprime

    Would not the bow tie and pocket kerchief give the game away as to Caldwell’s inerrant orientation no need for the little jig attempted…

    There is one fuck of a lot of intelligence going on in that video from both sides…no wonder it went, according to Caldwell, viral!

    Word to Caldwell…you are not helping very much, was the 100 bucks worth it it?

    So bigots and halfwits rejoice…your true colors shine through, like a rancid stain on humanity!

  • rietpluim

    Why do they call themselves National Organization for Marriage when they are obviously against marriage?

  • Donnie

    @Ed

    NOM March to Feature Man Who Can Cure The Gay by Laying On Hands

    Seriously? Is this the start of one of your stand up routines?????

    Aren’t these cures called massage palours? 20 minutes later your ‘gay’ inclinations are cured for the next 24 hours (all cures not guaranteed. cure length based upon personal libido and is not representative. All cures ‘as is’. No money back if not satisfied. Check local regulations and consult your doctor to make sure that you are healthy enough before attempting our gay cures techniques.

  • zentrout

    I really like the gay guy’s jacket.

  • whheydt

    According to KCBS (CBS radio affiliate in San Francisco), the Archbishop of San Francisco will *not* be attending the march, unlike last year. I guess he’s got too many issues to deal with at home at the moment and doesn’t need to add any more fuel to the fire.