Poor Ben Carson Just Can’t Win

I almost feel bad for Ben Carson (almost, but not quite). The poor guy puts in all this effort to polish his anti-gay bonafides to court the Christian right, then in their never-ending quest for ideological purity, they get mad at him anyway because he endorsed a senator who isn’t anti-gay enough for them.

In March 2013, Senator Portman, who was once staunchly pro-family, revealed that his own son is a homosexual and announced his support for “same-sex marriage.” That brought a strong reaction from conservatives in Ohio, including Phil Burress, who is chairman of the Citizens for Community Values Action PAC and has vowed to work hard for a Portman GOP primary defeat next year.

But Dr. Ben Carson, who is expected to officially announce his candidacy for president early next month, has officially endorsed Portman’s re-election. “I want to see Rob Portman re-elected to the U.S. Senate and encourage Ohio voters to join his campaign and keep the Senate in Republican control,” said Carson last weekend.

“That sent shockwaves to the pro-family community, and basically it took him off my list,” Burress shares.

And he believes this move will severely damage Dr. Carson’s chances of becoming president, “Because if you come out and endorse a candidate who believes in same-sex marriage, then that pretty much puts you into the same camp,” he contends.

It’s the same problem Republican candidates always have. You have to pick your poison: you can appeal to the hardcore bigots on the Christian right or you can appeal to everyone else, but you can’t do both. And if you try to appeal to the bigots, you’d better do it every single day as loudly as you can and never even hint at the possibility that you would ever do anything but continue to appease them or they’ll dump you in an instant. Oh well, that’s what happens when your target audience are bigots.

POPULAR AT PATHEOS Nonreligious
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  • John Pieret

    That’s why I don’t think a SCOTUS decision in favor of gay marriage is going to help Republicans through the primary season. Any deviation from the “get the gays” line will bring strong opposition from the bigot wing of the party and any attempt to placate them will be very hard to run away from in the general election. But time will tell.

  • Reginald Selkirk

    And he believes this move will severely damage Dr. Carson’s chances of becoming president…

    Ha ha ha ha ha. His what?

  • http://kamakanui.zenfolio.com Kamaka

    the pro-family community

    Oh, look, the bigot monster is hiding behind a pretty mask.

  • wreck

    “..,Citizens for Community Values Action PAC and has vowed to work hard for a Portman GOP primary defeat next year.”

    Because nothing says Community Values like trying to make sure your own son is treated like a second class citizen.

    “And he believes this move will severely damage Dr. Carson’s chances of becoming president”

    Yeah, Carson was practically a shoo-in before this.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    With all of the purity tests and purges, what happens when the GOP reaches Pure Asshole?

  • wreck

    @ Mo #5:

    “With all of the purity tests and purges, what happens when the GOP reaches Pure Asshole?”

    It’ll be Santorum all the way dawn.

  • Reginald Selkirk

    With all of the purity tests and purges, what happens when the GOP reaches Pure Asshole?

    The Anal Singularity.

  • Larry

    I don’t know anything about Pure Asshole, but the GOP has been at Peak Asshole for quite a long time.

  • eric

    Oh, I’m sure he’ll backtrack and say he no longer thinks Portman is a good choice. This will allow him to get back up to the 7%* of GOP support he had before.

    *Number made up for rhetorical purposes.

  • Trebuchet

    Carson, like Herman Cain before him, is a token. He’s not white enough to actually get nominated. (Nor is Jindal, for that matter, despite his official portrait.)

  • Hercules Grytpype-Thynne

    That sent shockwaves to the pro-family community

    I’m all in favor of families. Including families with gay people in them.

  • marcus

    MO @ 5 “With all of the purity tests and purges, what happens when the GOP reaches Pure Asshole?

    Well, it creates an “Asshole Singularity” wherein all logical thought, often including the craniums in which those thoughts originated, within range of the event horizon are drawn catastrophically into the depths of the singularity. It should be noted that no reasonable or rational thought has ever been witnessed exiting the event horizon. For some unknown reason fuck-wittery and ass-hattery seem to be immune to the effect of the event, and are allowed to spew forth practically without restriction.

  • John Pieret

    In a totally unsurprising development, bigot par excellence, Peter LaBarbera, has also jumped on Carson:

    http://www.onenewsnow.com/politics-govt/2015/04/28/labarbera-names-names-among-gop-candidates#.VUABenrwvIV

    LaBarbera also attacked Ohio Governor John Kasich (even though he opposes same-sex marriage) because the guv plans to attend the same-sex ceremony of a gay friend. Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker, attended the reception of a homosexual marriage but didn’t go to the actual ceremony also came under LaBarbera’s fire.

    Ideological purity on steroids!

  • marcus

    John Pieret@13

    I’m sure LaBarbera himself would love to attend one of these events. Just ask him, he would probably bring his own bag of stones (or at least a couple of handfuls of gravel).

  • dan4

    Wait, it’s ANTI-family to change your policy position on an issue because of your child? That’s pretty much the very definition of being “pro-family”.

  • thebookofdave

    Ideological purity on steroids!

    Not steroids, John Pieret, so much as hemorrhoids.