Dave Brat Tosses a Sarah Palin-level Word Salad

During their challenge in The Princess Bride, Wesley says to Vizzini, “Truly you have a dizzying intellect.” That phrase came to mind as I listened to this diatribe by Rep. Dave Brat, the guy who shocked the country by defeating Eric Cantor last year. See if you can make any sense of this:

The ‘DREAM,’ unfortunately, is the cynical use of language that only George Orwell could come up with where logic is just flipped on its head, so you call something that’s illegal a ‘dream.’ So, when Martin Luther King said, ‘I have a dream,’ he had a true dream of a better day for all of us under the law.

He had a Ph.D. in theology — everybody forgets this — he came out of the Judeo-Christian tradition, which started way back when, but roughly with Moses, and in the U.S. Congress, when the speaker looks out, guess who the first face he sees staring him eyeball-to-eyeball? Moses. So the dream can never be, and nothing in the longer-term religious tradition, you can’t violate the law and have a sane culture over the long run. So you have to first of all have foundations that matter, a spiritual foundation or legal foundation, then we finally were fortunate enough to have a free-market foundation, and all of that made us the richest country on the face of the earth.

So now we’re threatening, all these pillars are under attack, the faith doesn’t get discussed in school anymore, the rule of law is under threat, it’s called the “DREAM Act,” free markets are in just free-fall, there’s hardly any free markets left. So we’re going the wrong direction…

“If you want a total separation of church and state, get rid of law and get rid of love, because that’s in the tradition.”

A lovely word salad with a bullshit vinaigrette.

[soundcloud url=”https://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/203461535″ params=”color=ff5500″ width=”100%” height=”166″ iframe=”true” /]

POPULAR AT PATHEOS Nonreligious
What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • anubisprime

    ‘Wot?’….

  • wreck

    “So you have to first of all have foundations that matter, a spiritual foundation or legal foundation…”

    I’ll take the legal foundation, thank you.

  • http://www.electricminstrel.com Brett McCoy

    “the Judeo-Christian tradition, which started way back when, but roughly with Moses” Hahah

    Hahahhaha

    Hhahahahahaaaaaaa!

  • abb3w

    Word salad with lots of phatic croutons; not a lot of semantic meat.

  • http://twitter.com/#!/TabbyLavalamp Tabby Lavalamp

    So you have to first of all have foundations that matter, a spiritual foundation or legal foundation, then we finally were fortunate enough to have a free-market foundation, and all of that made us the richest country on the face of the earth.

    Well, the actively undermining other nations has helped that free market keep you rich…

  • eric

    it’s called the “DREAM Act,” free markets are in just free-fall, there’s hardly any free markets left.

    Dude, I don’t know what you’ve been smoking, but AFAIK all the technocrat business-types in the GOP love the concept of easier, faster immigration, particularly for educated young folk. Larger labor pool = lower wages. You’re talking like its going to bring on communism when the capitalist corporations are the biggest supporters of it.

  • ZugTheMegasaurus

    An explanation worthy of a Miss America question!

  • dugglebogey

    Your policy of “whenever someone uses the phrase “judeo christian” whatever they say afterwords is complete bullshit” is still intact.

  • Jared James

    Objection! insufficient use of the phrase “and such as.”

  • colnago80

    Nikita Khrushchev: We will bury you and you will sell us the shovels.

  • corporal klinger

    English is not my birth language but I think I have a good grasp of the language. Still, it happens that I read something and just don’t get it, I mean I understand the words but the phrase that I’m reading makes no sense in that moment. Usually, after a second or third reading pieces come together and I understand. So, I tried the same with this word salad; It’s not my knowledge of the English language – his babbling really makes no sense at all.

    For the polyglots among you, a bit of free fun: copy and paste the word salad into Google translator into your second language…………

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    To be fair, he’s got a point. Obama’s ruining the economy by making all these foreigners citizens. He should respect and exalt the Free Market, and be doing it the way that made America the richest country on Earth.

  • Pieter B, FCD

    A lovely word salad with a bullshit vinaigrette.

    I am SO stealing that.

    @klinger For even more fun, translate it back to English.

  • Larry

    Ummmmm, gobbledy-gook-licious!

  • dhall

    Moses is in Congress, and Boehner sees him? Hmm . . . Well, that says something about both Boehner and Brat, and their grasp of reality . . .

  • Chiroptera

    Pieter B, FCD, #13: For even more fun, translate it back to English.

    It couldn’t possibly make less sense than the original.

  • http://festeringscabofrealityblogspot.com fifthdentist

    I would bet dollars to belly button lint that this guy would be in favor of a law making English the official language in the U.S.-America.

  • http://www.clanfield.net janiceintoronto

    Did he actually -say- something?

  • otrame

    Corporal Kinger @11

    It actually looks like it’s been passed though a couple of languages with machine translators already.

  • Michael Heath

    Dave Brat states:

    . . . [MLK Jr.] came out of the Judeo-Christian tradition, which started way back when, but roughly with Moses . . .

    Now that’s just damn funny.

  • Larry

    It actually looks like it’s been passed though a couple of languages with machine translators already.

    Not to mention a German Enigma encrypter.

  • https://plus.google.com/101060696320014364594 Darren VanDusen

    If you used the translator don’t be surprised if it comes out “Super Karate Monkey Death Car”

  • helenaconstantine

    To the responder who thinks Brat and Beoehner are hallucinating Moses…

    The House chamber was decorated in 1950 with reliefs showing the busts of 23 famous lawgivers, including Moses–that is that Brat is referring to:

    http://www.aoc.gov/capitol-hill/relief-portrait-plaques-lawgivers/about-relief-portrait-plaques-lawgivers

    There is also one of the Ottoman Emperor Suleiman the Magnificent. I wonder what Brat thinks of that one.

  • StevoR

    “..the Judeo-Christian tradition, which started way back when, but roughly with Moses ..”

    I bet Abram – later Abraham – the guy who supposedly gets the three main monotheisms named after him must be feeling a bit left out now! Not to mention Adam the supposed first man by Creationist folklore. Don’t these guys literally believe in those guys or something?

    Jesus would have come onto the stage quite a lot later.

    See if you can make any sense of this: (David Brat’s word salad)

    (Reads through carefully, thrice. Rubs eyes. Scratches head, tries a couple more times.) Nope. It doesn’t get much more incoherent and meaning free than that.

    @7. ZugTheMegasaurus : “An explanation worthy of a Miss America question!”

    Hey! That’s unfair – to Miss America contestants! Almost all of whom can string together words much more coherently and concisely than that – and also truly mean well. Plus they’re not seeking to run the world even if they often do talking about bringing about world peace.

  • blf

    Plus [p0rn starlets are] not seeking to run the world even if they often do talking about bringing about world peace.

    The plen is vorking! (Bangs on translator a few times.) Ye plan ist working! They are all, really, of course, Reptilians, and the sales of fresh long pig (bangs on translator some more) slave auctions (slams it on the table a few times) wannabe model auditions are merely distractions…

  • shadowwalkyr

    By totally amazing coincidence, Dictionary.com’s Word of the Day is “bafflegab.”

    Don’t be surprised if this is used as a future example.

  • StevoR

    @blf : Umm, Miss America contestants and various beauty pageant winners (& losers too) aren’t necessarily involved in making any porn.

    You do know that right?

    (Okay maybe a few are but not all and probably not most of them I think. I don’t really know but well .. NB. Not defending beauty pagents or saying they ain’t problematic in some ways or anything just saying it as I grok it. Coudl be wrong and sure If I am folks here will point it out quickly enough!)

  • StevoR

    Not that its wrong of them if they are making porn either. If that’s really their free choice and not them getting exploited and mistreated and pushed into doing shit they don’t want to do. I dunno. Not an area I’m expert in or anything.

  • dcsohl

    “If you want a total separation of church and state, get rid of law and get rid of love

    I seem to recall, during Sotomayor’s confirmation hearing, she spoke on the role of empathy, and right-wingers went nuts, saying there’s no role for empathy in a Supreme Court Justice.

    Now they’re saying getting rid of empathy love will lead to “total separation of church and state” (which I’m assuming he thinks is a bad thing).

    I wish you guys would make up your minds.

  • matty1

    Reading that without my brain hurting is hard but this stood out “logic is just flipped on its head, so you call something that’s illegal a ‘dream.’ So, when Martin Luther King said, ‘I have a dream,’ he had a true dream of a better day for all of us under the law.”

    Is that the same Martin Luther King who wrote The Letter From Birmingham Jail?

  • Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden

    @matty1, #30:

    Fucking thank you. Someone needed to call that out, and I was going to if no one else did.

    Also:

    He had a Ph.D. in theology — everybody forgets this

    Everybody? Everybody?

    You mean the reason African-American communities consistently use “Dr. King” instead of “Martin Luther King” is because no African-American anywhere remembers that the man earned a doctorate and are sick of white people getting more respect than they’ve earned while failing to even the best of Black folk the respect they’ve demonstrably earned?

    Oh, thank you, White Republican Guy! Thank you for being the intellectual hero we deserve (just not the one we need right now), remembering such esoteric but important knowledge with your big, big brain!

    =======

    I wanted to stay with Dr King for a minute there, but back to matty1’s other point:

    In Loving v Virginia someone had a dream too.

    A dream that was illegal, you repulsive Republican-from-Virginia! Suck on that double-plus hard.

  • Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden

    failing to give even the best of Black folk

    FTFM