IA Right Wing Radio Host Goes Full Confederate

Jan Mickelson, the far-right talk show host from Iowa who is one of the kingmakers in that state’s Republican primaries, had Lindsey Graham on his show this week and declared that South Carolina is occupied territory that was invaded just like Russia invaded the Ukraine.

When Graham tried to draw a parallel between the American Civil War and the current conflict in Iraq, Mickelson jumped in to defend the Confederacy: “I don’t consider the North amongst ourselves. You mentioned capturing territory, I’m considering [Fort] Sumter, Sumter was South Carolinian territory and you were invaded, pretty much like the Russians are invading the Ukraine.”

Graham pleaded: “I can’t go down that road. I’m all for the union.”

Mickelson is not alone, as Deace regularly hosts secessionist Michael Peroutka, who blamed the North’s victory on supposed societal ills such as gay marriage.

At least Graham didn’t try to pander to the far-right on this one and pretend to agree with him. One of the things that the Tea Party movement has revealed in stark detail is that the American far-right (as opposed to more mainstream Republicans and conservatives) is stocked with neo-Confederates who want to turn the block back a century and a half.

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  • John Pieret

    Graham pleaded: “I can’t go down that road. I’m all for the union.”

    With friends like these …

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    Graham pleaded: “I can’t go down that road. I’m all for the union.”

    …and Graham just lost the primary. Deservedly so. F-ing RINO!!

  • D. C. Sessions

    Mickelson is not alone, as Deace regularly hosts secessionist Michael Peroutka, who blamed the North’s victory on supposed societal ills such as gay marriage.

    Wait a minute — the North won because of gay marriage?

  • Jared James

    @D.C.: Yep. After the British bombarded New Orleans for forty days and forty nights, the gay-married Shermans marched to the sea and captured Fort Sumter in Occupied Charlotte.

    But did we quit? Hell no!

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    At least they and Graham still agree on other important issues, like bombing everybody.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Keep identifying with traitors and losers, you Southerners.

    Better hope Ms. Anna ain’t the one to lead the next March to the Sea.

  • Pierce R. Butler

    … neo-Confederates who want to turn the block back a century and a half.

    Not just the block, the whole neighborhood!

    And 1865 does not bring back fond memories for that crowd. They want to regress at least 1.55 centuries.

    Nah, make it 1.56, so as to cancel that Darwin fellow’s book as well as Abe whazisname’s election.

  • tsig

    If they want to recreate Pickett’s charge I’m willing to yank the lanyards on the cannons to blow them away.

  • caseloweraz

    Mickelson is not alone, as Deace regularly hosts secessionist Michael Peroutka, who blamed the North’s victory on supposed societal ills such as gay marriage. (Emphasis added)

    Well, that’s just ridiculous. Common Core and Obamacare were the real causes of the Union victory.

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    …secessionist Michael Peroutka, who blamed the North’s victory on supposed societal ills such as gay marriage.

    Wait, what? Did the South legalize gay marriage before they started losing the war? Or did the North legalize it to help them win? If it’s the latter, maybe we can use it to beat ISIL and Putin too.

    And either way, I see yet another plot for yet another astronomically silly gay-porn movie here. Something with buff men marrying each other and then prancing about in half-naked victory dances on a battlefield…maybe some buff slaves spanking their effeminate former owners…

  • sharonb

    Hey,hey,hey Ms. Anna. The reason the union was able to invade was because there remained loyal us citizens and us property. The union had material interest in protecting those assets apart from the legitimacy/illegitimacy of secession. So, there are loyal southerners who abhor these traitorous bastards.

  • dingojack

    “Hey Ms Anna they’re killin’ yer soldiers below,

    So folks where ever they go,

    Will remember -”

    uh – oh you know – that fort-thingy – got besieged – just about everyone died – in Texas

    :) Dingo

  • Anna Elizabeth

    Please sharonb, don’t presume to lecture me on history. I am not the one that is comparing myself to losers and traitors.

    Save your lectures for your fellow Southerners. Thank you.

  • typecaster

    I’d just like to point out that the description of Peroutka’s argument in the post above is backwards. Following the link, we find that he blames things like gay marriage on the *effects* of the Northern victory. Even he isn’t quite crazy enough to think that gay marriage had anything to do with Civil War battles.

  • http://www.facebook.com/eo.raptor.3 eoraptor

    tsig@8. Have you been to the Gettysburg battlefield? Particularly in July, in the afternoon? There’s nothing more invigorating than hiking up hill in 90 degree temperatures and 90% humidity.

    Longstreet knew the whole thing was going to be a boondoggle from the get-go, but did his duty ( guess). Somehow, Pickett and his men, had to start their charge (mostly walking), at the base of a fairly steep hill leading up to Cemetery Ridge, about 3/4 of a mile away. Talk about shooting fish in a barrell.

  • Anna Elizabeth

    @eoraptor – and of course, even had Pickett’s division (somehow) ruptured the Union line, there were zero reserves in place to exploit any gap, and the Confederate artillery had pretty much shot their ammunition dry.

    It was the “High Water Mark” of the Confederacy – a charge to nowhere, that accomplished nothing, and would *not* have accomplished anything. It seems a fitting thing to describe the Confederacy.

    @typecaster – I guess if those manly He-men of the Glorious South had won, then good Xtians wouldn’t have to deal with uppity Bi chicks like me? XD

  • D. C. Sessions

    Following the link, we find that he blames things like gay marriage on the *effects* of the Northern victory.

    Fair enough — I suspect that there wouldn’t be much in the way of LGBT rights in a feudal, agrarian, slave economy South with the trash kept in line by their betters by the Bible and the lash. On the other hand, the rest of the country would very likel be much more modern (think Canada) without 150 years of Southern reactionaries in the Senate and the Supreme Court. Perhaps especially with a third-world basket case on the southeastern border to serve as a reminder.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1159674804 robertbaden

    The South won during Reconstruction. The North eventually betrayed the former slaves in their struggle against Southern whites.

  • dhall

    You’re all wrong, according to a student’s paper from a few years ago. The student explained that the North won because Robert E. Lee outmaneuvered the Confederate Army. So there you have it.

  • Al Dente

    from Iowa

    Someone needs to explain to Mickelson that Iowa was a Union state during the Civil War. Over 76,000 Iowa men served in the Union Army out of a male population of 675,000.

  • Electric Shaman

    Thank you Al Dente, for bringing this up. As a born and raised Iowan, I was pretty worried that people here were associating Iowa with the Confederacy. Say what you will about Iowa’s backwardness and batshit crazy conservatives, but in my lifetime I have never heard a fellow Iowan claim that Iowa was part of the Confederacy or wished Iowa had been a part of the Confederacy, though admittedly that could just be a result of the circles I ran in when I lived there. For the most part I think Iowans take it as a matter of pride that we were in the Union if the subject is ever mentioned.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Electric Shaman, neat. I didn’t even know that people in Iowa ran in circles. Here, in wherever it is I’m from, we run in a straight line. I haven’t been home in twenty years. I mean, I try to get back, but every time I set off I keep getting farther and farther away.

  • Electric Shaman

    Of course Iowans run in circles Modus. Where do you think all the crop circles come from? Aliens?

    I did only run in a circle around the same three people, however, and now that I think about it they were pretty boring. All they did was talk about how awesome it was that Iowa fought for the North.