Avi Lipkin’s Triumphant Return to Paranoid Hysteria

You remember Avi Lipkin, right? He’s the guy who has been claiming that President Obama is moving “50-100 million” Muslims into the United States and hiding them in our national parks until they day he gives the order and they take over the country and impose Sharia law. He appeared at a conference at Jim Garlow’s church and delivered some more paranoia:

Jewish author Avi Lipkin warned Monday that “all” churches in America have been infiltrated by Muslim spies who frequently pretend to have found Christ but are really looking to provide intelligence to radical Muslims who will try to kill all Jews and Christians when jihad is ordered upon the U.S…

When Muslims are called to jihad, Lipkin believes that they will already have personal information on Jews and Christians because they will have used deception to build personal relationships with those they seek to exterminate.

Explaining that it is a violation of the Quran for Muslims to seek relationships with Jews and Christians, Lipkin said there is an exception for those who plan to act as Islamic spies on churches and synagogues.

Lipkin further explained that his wife, an Egyptian-born Jewess named Rachel, is an avid monitor of various Islamic broadcasts, television feeds and other Islamic news outlets. In one particular Arabian broadcast, Lipkin said Rachel heard the claim made that “all” churches in America have Muslim spies.

“It is very dangerous for a Muslim to even be associated with Christian missionaries or Christian churches unless they are spies. My wife has picked up broadcasts that say all the churches in America have Muslim spies in them, including former Christians who converted to Islam,” Lipkin said.

“When Muslims come to you and say ‘Oh yes, we have accepted Christ and we are born-again,’ you gotta be real careful because lying in Arabic is not only permissible it is commanded. Lying is a virtue in Islam to defeat the enemy.”

Lipkin told the story of one highly-decorated Middle Eastern Muslim doctor who applied for a Canadian visa in order to set up a medical office in Edmonton, Alberta. Before leaving for Canada, Lipkin explained that radical Muslims demanded that she record the personal information, addresses and phone numbers of her Jewish and Christian patients in Edmonton. The Muslims demanded that after she acquired the personal information of her non-Muslim patients, she had to send it to them on a disk so that information can be used to kill her patients once jihad has been ordered in Canada.

“When a war breaks out in the Middle East and orders for jihad come to the Muslims of Canada, the Muslims of Edmonton will kill the Jews of Edmonton and Muslims of Toronto will kill the Jews of Toronto and the Muslims of Vancouver will kill the Jews of Vancouver,” Lipkin continued.

I especially like the claim that “lying in Arabic” is commanded. Arab is not the same thing as Muslim. Which he might know, but clearly doesn’t care.

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  • eric

    Lipkin explained that radical Muslims demanded that she record the personal information, addresses and phone numbers of her Jewish and Christian patients in Edmonton.

    Right. Because without phone numbers and addresses, it is impossible to find the Christians in the US and Canada. Its not like they are 75% of the population.

  • Brent

    In one particular Arabian broadcast, Lipkin said Rachel heard the claim made that “all” churches in America have Muslim spies.

    Suddenly and inexplicably, the Arab media have taken a break from their usual diet of insane conspiracy theories and clumsy half-truths to become a model of probity and accuracy. One of my favorites was the announcement last year by the Egyptian government that army scientists had, with only a few weeks’ worth of work, perfected a simple device that cures hepatitis and AIDS in a matter of hours, a triumph that has for decades eluded the world’s best (and best-funded) scientists. http://www.cnn.com/2014/02/27/world/africa/egypt-aids-cure-claim/

    Apparently, Lipkin is of the school of thought that “I heard it on ISIS news radio so it must be the literal truth.” What a moron.

  • John Pieret

    that information can be used to kill her patients once jihad has been ordered in Canada

    I wonder how many millions of Muslims Stephen Harper is hiding in the arctic.

  • http://timgueguen.blogspot.com timgueguen

    Don’t forget that when someone like Lipkin talks about Jews and Christians, he may think that the only real ones are the kind who believe exactly like he does. So of course the Muslim super commandoes will need lists of Jews and Christians. They don’t want to kill fake Christians, like Roman Catholics, Episcopalians etc.

  • lofgren

    Jewish author Avi Lipkin warned Monday that “all” churches in America have been infiltrated by Muslim spies who frequently pretend to have found Christ

    LET THE PURGE COMMENCE.

  • StevoR

    You remember Avi Lipkin, right?

    Actually wrong, nope. Don’t recall that particular dropkick. Then again, there are so many to choose from, alas for the world if not your supply of material.

    He’s the guy who has been claiming that President Obama is moving “50-100 million” Muslims into the United States and hiding them in our national parks until they day he gives the order and they take over the country and impose Sharia law.

    Well, he’s been waiting a fair while to set that plan into motion now hasn’t he? When Obama doing that – very last minute before he steps down or is he leaving it to Hillary?

    “When a war breaks out in the Middle East and orders for jihad come to the Muslims of Canada, the Muslims of Edmonton will kill the Jews of Edmonton and Muslims of Toronto will kill the Jews of Toronto and the Muslims of Vancouver will kill the Jews of Vancouver,” Lipkin continued.

    Lipkin knows this – how? His evidence or even faintest skerrick of logic and reason to show why this will likely be so or to prove this is so is what?

    Arab is not the same thing as Muslim. Which he might know, but clearly doesn’t care.

    Or, more cynically, perhaps that fact just gets in the way of fleecing the rubes for fame and dollars?

  • StevoR

    PS. Oh yeah : “When a war breaks out in the Middle East” -Lipkin.

    When? Does this klown not know about the current wars – plural – raging over there in Syria-Iraq, Yemen etc .. right now?

    PPS. Could we please lose the automatic “read more” link / tag thingamajig here? KInda annoying to have to keep deleting it every few minutes.

  • dingojack

    Stevo — “Lipkin knows this – how? His evidence or even faintest skerrick of logic and reason to show why this will likely be so or to prove this is so is what?”

    The answer is this:

    ‘My wife has picked up broadcasts that say all the churches in America have Muslim spies in them, including former Christians who converted to Islam’ Lipkin said.”

    Presumably from sooper secret messages beamed straight to her head — well until she bought, by accident, the extra-extra thick aluminium foil…

    @@ Dingo

  • carpenterman

    If this guy’s taking drugs, he needs to stop.

    And if he’s not taking drugs, he needs to start.

    Seriously, this isn’t funny. This man is mentally ill. He should see a doctor.

  • caseloweraz

    In one particular Arabian broadcast, Lipkin said Rachel heard the claim made that “all” churches in America have Muslim spies.

    Ah, now it becomes clear. In transcribing this broadcast, Rachel made a simple error. What I don’t understand is what all these churches want with Muslims’ pies.

  • Kermit Sansoo

    Monsters are Due on Maple Street

    .

    Just sayin’

  • Richard Smith

    Lying is a virtue in Islam to defeat the enemy.

    In one particular Arabian broadcast, Lipkin said Rachel heard the claim made that “all” churches in America have Muslim spies.

    So, lying to defeat the enemy is a virtue in Islam? And Rachel heard the claim on an Islamic broadcast? Couldn’t they be (GASP!) lying?

    Hey, Lipkin, everything Islamicists say is a lie, and Islamicists say lying is a virtue to defeat the enemy. But if they’re lying about lying, then they actually tell the truth. But if they tell the truth, then they are actually lying. But then they are telling the truth… Illogical, illogical. All units relate. All units. Norman, coordinate. (From the never-produced episode of Star Trek, “I, Lipkin”.)

  • blf

    What I don’t understand is what all these churches want with Muslims’ pies.

    It’s a well-meaning attempt to better understand each other: Exchange gifts, a common meal, and so on…

    I understand the plan is the Muslims will bring dessert (e.g., pies), and the xians the main course (e.g., roasted pork… hum, I can see a problem here!) and bad jokes about Muslims being dessert Arabs. I suspect this plan needs a bitquite a lot of work, perhaps starting with waiting for Ramadan to end.

  • Kermit Sansoo

    Not only are the fundies and neoliberals scientifically incompetent, they are numerically illiterate. The first thing I do when I hear something like “sneaking in 50,000,000 Muslims and hiding them in national parks” is to do back-of-the-napkin figures in my head. Over several years that’s 50,000 or so Muslims smuggled in per day. through the airports. Then cumulatively kept inconspicuously in national parks disguised as what? Campers? The “real” campers would be maybe 1% of the population in the parks on any given day! Do these people ever crunch the numbers, look up the history, check the science, ask themselves if people ever, ever would act like they imagine? I guess not.

  • amenhotepstein

    …“all” churches in America have been infiltrated by Muslim spies who frequently pretend to have found Christ but are really looking to provide intelligence to radical Muslims who will try to kill all Jews and Christians…

    What kind of “intelligence” do these “radicals” need to gather? What about Christians and Jews isn’t common knowledge? I can see the report now: “If you wish to kill all the Christians at once, attack on SUNDAY MORNING, but to kill the Jews you must attack on FRIDAY NIGHT!” Such keen insights!

  • Pierce R. Butler

    … one highly-decorated Middle Eastern Muslim doctor …

    Decorated with what – ribbons & wrapping paper? Costume jewelry? Blinking lights & tinsel?

    C’mon, Avi, give us a clue. You do have one somewhere, dontcha?

  • naturalcynic

    They’re all disguised a mooses. Except for the ones being hidden by the beavers in their lodges.

  • thebookofdave

    @Kermit Sansoo #14

    The first thing I do when I hear something like “sneaking in 50,000,000 Muslims and hiding them in national parks” is to do back-of-the-napkin figures in my head. Over several years that’s 50,000 or so Muslims smuggled in per day.

    Two words: Keystone Pipeline.

  • dingojack

    Weird how ‘Evuuuullll Moslims’ need to gather intelligence to kill Christians at worship —

    but this loser* just walked in and opened fire…

    Dingo

    ———

    * but totally not a news-worthy terrorist, purveyor of hate-crimes or corpse (shot in the back whilst fleeing unarmed from the cops, in ‘self-defence’), no sirree-bob. Too melanin-deficient. @@

  • jnorris

    The Muslims have to infiltrate the churches because the telephone companies don’t publish phone books and the jihadistians don’t have the money to buy the 2010 census data.