Wait, They’re Still Building Conspiracy Theories Around ACORN?

ACORN has not existed in many years, but that trifling little fact has not stopped the wingnuts from continuing to use them as a central boogeyman in all of their dark conspiracy fantasies. Wayne Allyn Root, former Libertarian Party presidential candidate, shows how it’s done:

Root speculated that Obama threatened to launch a Justice Department investigation into the Clinton Foundation if the former secretary of state refused to endorse the Iran deal, but told her that “if you go along with this, I’ll help you steal the election like I did in 2012. I’ll get my old pals from ACORN back together again, the old gang is back, and we will steal states with weak voter ID laws, we’ll have illegal aliens voting, we’ll figure out ways to stuff the ballot box in inner cities so that more people vote than are registered to vote in that district. We will figure out a way to steal you the election the same way we stole it for me. But if you go against me, you’re done.”

Malone later stated that “how any liberal Jew out there in Hollywood could support the President or Hillary Clinton at this point is beyond me,” and hoped that they realize that “the Democratic Party is the party against the Holy Land.”

I know I sound like a broken record, but I don’t suppose you have any actual evidence for this, do you Mr. Root? No? How surprising. Using that standard, I could just as easily say that last week you sodomized a gopher — and if you don’t need any evidence, neither would I. Isn’t it funny how you can just make shit up and have people listen to you?

[soundcloud url=”https://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/215729369″ params=”color=ff5500″ width=”100%” height=”166″ iframe=”true” /]

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • StevoR

    Well from a little acorn a mighty oak doth grow ..

    The acorn even disappears for time out of sight before the oak seedling germinates ..

    In fairness, he does say “old pals back together *again*” and even adds the ~ic” at the end of Democratic party.

  • StevoR

    Also I guess if your side is in the habit of only winning elections because you’ve rigged them that way and are playing dirty (cough, Dubya Bush, versus Gore, cough) you probably fully expect everyone else is doing the same thing too..

  • Pierce R. Butler

    Yabbut it was a consenting, adult, OPPOSITE-SEX gopher!

  • colnago80

    Re Butler @ #3

    You sure about that?

  • Reginald Selkirk

    Hey, ACORN has got nothing on the Illuminati.

  • caseloweraz

    Malone later stated that “how any liberal Jew out there in Hollywood could support the President or Hillary Clinton at this point is beyond me,” and hoped that they realize that “the Democratic Party is the party against the Holy Land.”

    He actually said “Democratic Party”? He must be slipping.

  • marcus

    Pierce R. Butler @3 Well, I know about those gophers. They get all tarted up and start sashaying around… well, you know the rest.

  • abb3w

    It seems potentially relevant to Ed’s prospective allegations regarding the gopher that Mr. Root apparently lives in Nevada, which seems to be one of the states that presently lacks laws against humans engaging in sexual relations outside their species.

  • busterggi

    It all began with Dutch Elm Disease…

  • lorn

    I’m not sure anyone should interrupt this sort of thing. The man has backed himself into a back corner of his own imagination and is now surrounded by fears summoned from the darkest depths of his psyche. From here it is a rubber room and Thorazine, or mastery of his fears and recovery.

  • laurentweppe

    They’re Still Building Conspiracy Theories Around ACORN?

    Why wouldn’t they? The Illuminati disbanded in 1787 and they’re still making conspiracy theories about this group today.

  • http://www.pandasthumb.org Area Man

    I’m genuinely curious how Libertarians live with themselves after appointing this guy their leader. Say what you will about their beliefs, but libertarian types at least try to maintain a facade of rationality.

  • http://www.pandasthumb.org Area Man

    Malone later stated that “how any liberal Jew out there in Hollywood could support the President or Hillary Clinton at this point is beyond me,”…

    I love it when they pretend to have the best interests of liberal Jews at heart, and how they’re always clawing for explanations as to why Jews won’t vote for them. Bonus points if they dredge up a tired Jewish stereotype, like lording over Hollywood.

  • Chiroptera

    Maybe the House of Representatives can pass another budget bill explicitly defunding ACORN again.