Fischer: Every Bad Thing is a Warning From God

Screenshot from Youtube clip

There are few things that amuse me more than the interminable wankery from the Christian right about how every bad thing that happens is a warning from God, or punishment from God, for -- what a coincidence -- whatever the person making that claim personally doesn't like. On his radio show last week, Fischer continued this inane line of "reasoning" and said that all natural disasters, losses in war and economic downturns are God's warnings to us: … [Read more...]

Mickelson Stands By Slavery Plan, Hosts Another Presidential Candidate

Jan Mickelson

Iowa right wing radio host Jan Mickelson is not backing down from his appalling suggestion that immigrants who are in the country illegally should be rounded up and made slaves of the state. He told Media Matters that his idea is "constitutionally defensible, legally defensible, morally defensible, biblically defensible and historically defensible." And then Ted Cruz went on his show as if he wasn't a horrible piece of shit. … [Read more...]

Seriously Michael Savage, I’m Kind of Embarrassed For You Now

https://goo.gl/RY7VJn

You know that feeling you get when you watch someone say or do something really humiliating and you start to feel embarrassed for them, to the point where you think you just can't watch it anymore? I'm starting to feel that way about Michael Savage, who is taking his man-crush on Donald Trump to truly pathetic new heights. He's now dreaming about him and talking about how proud the billionaire makes him feel of himself. … [Read more...]

Glenn Beck to Deploy 1000 ‘Unity Teams’

GlennBeck

If Glenn Beck did not exist, I might have to invent him. Who else, save perhaps Donald Trump and Larry Klayman, manages to be so thoroughly ridiculous, self-aggrandizing and endlessly amusing than Beck? His wild pendulum swings between gloom and hope, his self-declared daily communications with God, his constant claims of having been right about everything...he's just the total package. And now he's working with David Barton to deploy "unity teams" to diffuse situations like the unrest in … [Read more...]

Mikey Weinstein Gets an Offer He CAN Refuse

I often publish emails that are sent to Mikey Weinstein by various cranks, kooks and haters, always of the Christian variety and nearly always incredibly anti-Semitic too. But he got one on Friday and forwarded it to me that takes a whole new approach. They're offering him a million dollars (!) to either shut down the Military Religious Freedom Foundation or undergo a 3-month Christian training program to cure him of his evil ways. I'm not even joking. … [Read more...]

How WND Turns a Rumor Into a Conspiracy Theory

Tin_foil_hat_2

The headline on the front page of the Worldnetdaily screams, "Obama finds legal way to stay in White House?" When you click on it, the headline on the actual article changes to "Michelle Obama to jump in race for president? Rumors run wild about first family finding way to stay in White House." And then you read the article and what is the basis for these alleged "wild rumors"? This: … [Read more...]

Right Wing Radio Host Wants to Turn Immigrants Into Slaves

Jan Mickelson

Being a right-wing radio talk show host must be very difficult. If you want to get noticed, you have to somehow find a way to say things even more bizarre and outrageous than people like Michael Savage, Steve Deace and Rick Wiles. Iowa wingnut host Jan Mickelson is apparently up to the task, saying that instead of deporting immigrants who are here illegally, we should round them up and turn them into slaves. … [Read more...]

Palin Tosses Most Palinesque Word Salad Yet

WordSalad

Though she is no longer a Fox News paid contributor, Sarah Palin is still invited on some of the shows there from time to time to deliver her usual aimless diatribes. On Greta Van Susteren's show the other day she came up with what might be the Platonic ideal of the Sarah Palin word salad. Read this and tell me this doesn't sound like it was written by a computer program called Wingnut Madlibs for Windows 8: … [Read more...]

Doocy Agrees With Trump on 14th Amendment

Constitution

Steve Doocy, the dumbest man on television, delivered a typically ignorant soliloquy in support of Donald Trump's claim that the 14th Amendment does not grant birthright citizenship. And his "reasoning" is that hoary old bit of absurdity long used by enemies of equality to the effect that the 14th Amendment was passed to protect slaves and therefore only applies to slaves or to racial equality. … [Read more...]

OK ‘Patriot’ Second Amendments Himself Guarding Gun Store

Gun

There's a gun shop owner in Oklahoma who, like a couple of other gun stores around the country, publicly declared his store to be a Muslim-free zone, in flagrant violation of the Civil Rights Act. Naturally, a bunch of local yokel uber-patriots decided that their presence was required to guard the store against impending attack. And one of those dumbasses managed to shoot himself with his own gun. … [Read more...]

Markell: Pope Francis Might Be the ‘False Prophet’

https://goo.gl/T5ALTq

End-times radio host Jan Markell fancies herself an expert on Biblical eschatology, a designation that always makes me chuckle. It's like claiming to be an oracle for the Greek pantheon of gods, you're claiming to be an "expert" in something that does not exist. But she's been studying up and she thinks Pope Francis is the "false prophet" in their weird interpretation of the Bible that supposedly presages the second coming of Christ. … [Read more...]

Savage: Liberals are Mentally Ill Due to Diet. And Drugs.

https://goo.gl/RY7VJn

Michael Savage's recent bit of obsessive dumbassery is that he has begun to claim that liberals are mentally ill because they're all vegans or on some other diet that robs the brain of carbohydrates needed to function properly. Oh, and they're also on drugs, dontchaknow. That explains why they do crazy things like, oh I don't know, disagree with Michael Savage, which proves that they must be cuckoo for cocoa puffs or something. … [Read more...]


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