The Twilight Struggle: And Yet Miracles Happen

The Twilight Struggle: And Yet Miracles Happen September 2, 2015

Depression is a Lady without Mercy.
Depression is a Lady without Mercy.

We do not serve Genie Jesus, despite War Room’s claims.

Who is Genie Jesus? He is not the God become human that the historical records describe. Genie Jesus is not a person as much as a wish fulfillment device. If we just pray the right way, with the right words, or in the right place, Genie Jesus will give us treats on demand. Genie Jesus is the God of a prosperity gospel who wants his prophets to profit while their followers pay the bills.

Jesus of Nazareth loves us, but as God, Jesus wants what is best for us in eternity. Jesus balances our desires against the desires of every person who has ever lived or will live. Jesus cares for the sparrow and He cares for His creation. Every action we take changes everything. . . and every action He takes changes everything. Miracles happen, but they do not happen as often as one might wish if one did not know all there is to know.

This is not an abstract discussion, but thoughts spurred by my own wrestling with depression, severely depressed family members, and years of talking to students. One of those students, a Miss Sayers*, has been dialoguing with me about her own depression.  The Saint Constantine School is a sister program to  Wheatstone Ministries and one of our students followed up with questions about her own situation. This is my response to a question about miracles.

Dear Miss Sayers,

I have emphasized the need to see a medical doctor for physical problems, a therapist for emotional problems, and a good pastor for spiritual concerns because too often Christians pretend you can “pray away” problems. Louche “evangelists” prey on the flock with simplistic answers to complicated medical, psychological, and spiritual problems. Don’t buy it. We are a religion of the cross and of history.

God’s blessings are freely available. The right religious product is not going to help you.

I say all of this because so many presume on miracles and think they can sell the power of God. We know the evils of Simon Magus. And yet miracles happen. I know this personally and I have seen this in the lives of others. I know people who have prayed and God instantaneously released them from the depression both of us face. I have experienced physical healing that was instantaneous and joyful.

God does not delight in our suffering, He hates death, and He sets us free as quickly as He can. One reason I remain a Christian is that I can testify to miracles. In one case, I was with my Dad at a camp meeting where a disturbed person shouted blasphemies and ran away. My father rebuked the devils and I saw this man fall down as if he had run into a roadblock. He did not crumple, he flew into the air. He came up in this right mind . . . an attitude that was maintained over time.

He was free.

Isn’t this great? Stop a moment. Let’s rejoice. God does heal, God does deliver, God does restore to full mental health.

So I get it. I know the next question must be (and is in me): Why doesn’t God heal me? Does God want me to suffer?

God does not wish you to suffer. He will heal you: instantaneously if such healing is best, over time if that is best, and in eternity if that would make you the happiest. We wish healing now, but we both admit we do not know everything. We think we cannot go forward and we long for the miracle we both know happens. We do not presume on the miracle, but we wish it would happen to us.

This is good.

Jesus in the Garden prayed: “If it be possible . . . ” and it was not possible. He wanted to avoid the cup of suffering if that could be best, but it was not best so He said: “Nevertheless not my will but thine be done.” I wish my own healing would always take place without therapy, without counseling, without ascetic discipline. Sometimes I am healed instantaneously, but most often not.

Why?

How could this be good for me? Many of my problems are so deeply rooted in me that to instantaneously change them would be to change too much of me too quickly. I would be left not me. Instead, God will work slowly replacing one bit of me at a time so that my integrity as a person can be maintained. If I am patient, the result is the same, but it leaves me intact.

God heals quickly as He can, but why think that fast is best? It often is not. I could make Hope happy with my charge card today, but the bill would come due in a month. I could relieve my pain with too much drink, but there is a hangover in the morning. God’s healing never leads to a bill in month or a hangover in the morning.

And yet miracles happen. I rejoice in them and I am thankful when I have seen them. I pray for a miracle for you, but know this: healing will come. If it comes quickly, we call it a “miracle” and if it comes slowly we pretend it could have come without God. We both know better. Our very craving for normality, for happiness, and for joy points to a cosmos where there is a normal, happiness, and joy. We will all get there . . . and years later is no less a miracle if it leaves us as us than if it happens in a moment.

I want to bask in joy forever and not to get some temporary relief that leads to future diminution of joy.

Or so it seems to me.

Under the Mercy,

John Mark

 

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*Not her real name. Certain details have been excised. The first three parts of my discussion with Miss Sayers on depression can be found here, here and here.


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