The Joy & Pain of a Broken Empath

Empathy. Many days, it's awful. Being a broken empath? Nearly unbearable. I understand the "gift" of empathy. I understand that those of you who connect with my writing & have encouraged me to *finally* finish my memoir -or any book for that matter- see the spiritual gift of empathy in me. Being able to see & speak into the pain of others is a tremendously beautiful gift God has graciously allowed me to have to make my sista-frans & beautiful brothas a bit more at home in a world full of rejection. But. Empathy is the taking on of others pain. And I am a "high empath." Which means I'm feeling another's pain *almost* as if it were my own. If I'm closely connected to someone who's pain is unleashed in irresponsible ways, I am literally absorbing toxicity much like the dude on the 1st season of Heroes who absorbed others powers after he killed them, except I don't kill people so there's that. I digress.Yesterday I had a safe space conversation in which I ran through … [Read more...]

Things Are Changing

Things are changing. I'm so grateful, Good Lawd, God Almighty in heaven, I am so grateful. So. So. Grateful.I'm in reinvention: the absolute necessity to start again, the demand for change before rock-bottom meets certain death, the soul crying out for hope begging you to not to give up on your life type of reinvention. I'm in the latter half I believe. I'm through the hardest part. I'm peeking out now at the horizon seeing it's beauty, awestruck.The valley part, the low part, it's still dark there. I've had more than one ugly cry over the scariness of reinvention and the losses that crystallize. My job, for example, is the first career-oriented position in for-profit work I've had in 15 years. Career-wise, I had no choice but to reinvent.What is 2nd marriage if NOT the opportunity to reinvent the asshattery you brought to the 1st one? If I do nothing different in my 2nd marriage I have not evolved I've merely added a new spinning plate.  And my new husband is anything but … [Read more...]

Making All Things New – Book Review + Giveaway

I am reading -and loving- R. York Moore's newest book, Making All Things New: God's Dream For Global Justice.  Because York is my current mentor, married to one of my very bestest friends, my former InterVarsity staff worker & the one who led me to Christ and discipled me, it seemed fitting to mention that outright.  Also, he gave me an advanced copy to read and affiliate links are included.  Full disclosure is really sort of a thing nowadays, eh?  Okay, now that that's out of the way, I feel free to tell you this:I believe Making All Things New is a special and  important book for the Evangelical Christian community. As I tried to explain York's book to my hubby this morning, I was near tears when I told him how the book makes me love God all the more.  It renews my understanding of the Gospel, the price Jesus paid for us and the hope that Christians have toward the future."When the great eschatological realities of the Christian faith are ignored or allegorized, we lose … [Read more...]