In Which Rescue is on Deck

I turn 40 later this month, and as such have become hella reflective. This year has been one of the worst years of my life. So much so, I’m thinking of canceling my 40th birthday party. Please, please forgive my swears, but what is the gottdamb mutha-effin’ point of a celebration when you are wildly swiveling through the five stages of grief every other day or week? And please know, I do not say any of this lightly. I do not say that for the sake of page hits, Facebook hyperbole, ‘likes’ or pity.I say this because it’s completely, wildly, disappointingly, surprisingly, mortifyingly true. For those of you who’ve kept up with my blog & my writings know that the implosion of my 1st marriage, a complete breakdown, a fierce custody battle, an ugly divorce are all a part of my story, and that too was deeply painful. This year rivals the level of pain & hopelessness of those years. I cannot say why. I am still surprised at the turn of events. I only know life is as equally a nightm … [Read more...]

Something’s Wrong For Our Sisters

Beneath the stereotype of the angry black woman is an overlooked vulnerability.Rahiel Tesfamariam writes that black women act as if there is a war being waged against us. Yes, yes and more yes.Tesfamariam recognizes that the U.S. still doesn't know how to deal with the "angry black woman," whether she's Solange in an elevator or a woman lamenting the life of her dead son. She goes on to say, "We wouldn't have to fight so hard if our minds, bodies and spirits weren't constantly in danger of harm or threat of misuse."As a black woman, my instinct is to push down the sadness, squelch the anger, and reject the hopelessness until...I can't any more. I feel vulnerable, sometimes daily. Mostly, weekly. I can only bottle so much fear when, after repeated exposure of my vulnerabilities as a black woman, my hopelessness bubbles over, sloshing tears all over the place.Earlier this spring, more than 200 girls were stolen out of their school in Chibok, Nigeria. CNN claims the … [Read more...]

Do What You Love. #WINNING =)

Last week, I spoke for 125ish students at The Ohio State University.  I am very ashamed to admit it was one of the first times in a long time that I felt completely prepared.  I gave the message prep and delivery-practice adequate time.  It showed!  I was pretty nervous for about 8 hours until talk time, but once I got up in front of everybody my fears melted away and it ended up being a complete riot though the subject matter was difficult: hope and healing from sexual abuse and other scars.I loved it.Afterward... … [Read more...]

Sex. Abuse. Jesus. Poverty. Prostitution. Slam Poetry. Coulda killed me.

Dave & I saw these dudes perform today.  They are Gabe & Kirk of Kinetic Affect, masters of spoken word / slam poetry.They were some kind of amazing.  Super deep.  Awesome.  Engaging, raw, challenging & over-the-top talented.I was affected.What struck me about their pieces was how real-life it was.  They spoke of their fathers' abandonment, divorce, suicide, cancer and more.In poetry!In spoken word.In unison! (sometimes)In other words, they went there.They took me somewhere with them.I was affected.I went there.I sat and thought about some of my own drama: being an abuse victim.  A minority.  Poverty. The Detroit Ghetto.I remembered how those issues made a 10-year-old-me, feel.I remembered the many ways I felt my whole identity wrapping itself around the warped view that I had no worth.Other than sexually, of course.As Kinetic Affect did their thang, I remembered the moment I decided I was ready to commit to follow … [Read more...]

September 11 from a black, angry & racist perspective…

On 9/11, I have a vivid image of my husband bounding into our bedroom, swinging open the door and yelling, "Gracee, wake up!  We are at war!"  My 1st thought, of course was nuclear war.  I thought we had days, hours, perhaps even minutes to live.  (I know I'm such a drama queen, but seriously who says 'we're at war'?)My experience that day was unlike most.  In short, my reaction was extremely complex.  At length, I was confused, angry, bitter, racist & immature.  I hope I can explain that here.In the midst of the 9/11, 9th year anniversary, my thoughts today are meant to look at how events like 9/11 contribute to the complexity of race and racial issues. I hold just one perspective of a black American who felt completely divided about the attacks.Even more, as a biracial woman I felt split down the middle of my very identity; taking sides with myself and such.  It's been a long journey for me that is rife with struggle and tears yet ultimately led me to face the anger a … [Read more...]

Address Evil.

 The genocide in Darfur is deteriorating.  As, I looked at my 8 month old this morning I felt heavy-hearted as I considered what it would be like to not be able to feed him.I'm in awe of the women who love their kids so much but have to watch them starve. These women have relocated to displacement camps but still live with the constant threat of rape.The situation there is awful, and I admit even my prayers seem like useless act of service amidst such great distress.My challenge for us today is to take a few small steps toward being part of the solution.Why?~People are suffering tremendously and they need our help.  I get ancy when I have some small & insignificant problem and people won't help.  I can't imagine what the suffering & dying are wondering about why the world has continued to allow this to happen for 7+ years.  (If it were up to me I promise you I would have Sudan's tyrant of a President killed on the spot though I know that would onl … [Read more...]

It’s in the Bag

Because my husband also came home with a really cool blue Urbana bag, I thought I'd re-post "targetshoppers" recent blog about a really cool bag story..."My husband came home from Urbana with this really cool new bag. When I commented on it, he said, "you should hear the story behind it." And so, I heard the story, read the story, and am now passing on the story. The story is incredible and the bags are just so cool.Take some time to read about Freeset and to pray for them and to look through their amazing handiwork".Go ahead, you know you want one.  There's nothing like getting cool stuff while supporting an awesome cause! :) … [Read more...]

I have a dream (too)

Around this time last year I met a friend of the very gifted author, Ann Lamott.  My friend, N. made me downright blush as she said I, Grace Biskie reminded her of "Annie" and said she would love to pass on my memoir manuscript to her for a possible jacket cover recommendation!  (This would be beyond HUGE!  Anne Lamott wrote the jacket cover recommendation for the wildly popular, New York Times Best-Seller Eat, Pray, Love by: Elizabeth Gilbert).I remember getting back on the plane that night feeling that this was indeed a once in a lifetime opportunity.I remember asking God if I should drop out of school that semester so that I could go to work on my book full-time.  (It seemed fairly clear that between God, Dave, friends & wisdom in general, that was not a good idea).I remember the adrenaline pumping as I wrote this chapter of my book at 35,000 miles -Nashville to Detroit- that very day.I thought for sure I'd have something to send N. to give to Anne Lamott by earl … [Read more...]

What good can come from Detroit?

You probably won't have a hard time believing me when I say I often    have to ask myself, "is this blog more appropriately expressed in my private journal or should I just click that "publish" button over on the right?"  I guess this one fits into both because for some reason I'd really like to share my totally bizarre experience today.  Like any other day, it was a fluctuation of emotions.Today, I started my 1st set of exams towards becoming an ordained Minister of Word & Sacrament in the Reformed Church of America. If someone had told me everything that would have to be accomplished before I would actually obtain my Masters of Divinity along with this entirely long & complicated outside process of pursuing ordination I'm not sure I would have done it.  The Masters program alone is a whopping 96 credit hours in addition to that you have to do 3 years of an internship, preach 12 times at various local churches plus hours of exams and papers for the ordination piece.  It see … [Read more...]

Britney, McCain & the Biskies

I read somewhere the other day that The McCain Family -mom & pop- gave $1,800 in charitable giving out of their estimated $280k they made last year.  I think that sucks.  It's less than 1% of their income for the year.  And this is the dude most of evangelical America wanted for their prez?  Shame on us.  If our presidential hopeful can't even write one check for more than $2k to a single organization who is doing good in the world -and there are soooo many to choose from- that's a doggone shame.  And yet, we believed that he was God's man for the job?  I just struggle with that, I'll be honest with you.  This is not my shining example of a Jesus follower I tell you that much.  Jesus loved justice & gave all he had pursuing it.  (I believed what Jesus was about more closely aligned with Obama's office & so I didn't vote for McCain).I'm proud to say that Dave & I went through great efforts to give a little more than 13% of our total income. Not because I wanna be all … [Read more...]