The Prison of My Person, The Shackles of My Skin

Wesley Hill quotes some powerful words from CS Lewis on masturbation and lustful fantasy: For me the real evil of masturbation would be that it takes an appetite which, in lawful use, leads the individual out of himself to complete (and correct) his own personality in that of another (and finally in children and even grandchildren) and turns it back: sends the man back into the prison of himself, there to keep a harem of imaginary brides. And this harem, once admitted, works against his ever … [Read more...]

From Christopher R. Beha, “What Happened to Sophie Wilder”

Sometimes too we spoke about our classes, but only to disparage them."They wanted to talk about what we learned from Keats," Sophie said. "It's like asking what you learned from getting laid. I learned that I like how he makes me feel." (yes, I'm reading it) … [Read more...]

This Mockingbird Article About Sex and Internet Porn

quotes literally all of the good bits of the Alain de Botton piece it's riffing on; dodges de Botton's more banal or wrongheaded generalizations (AdB writes as if internet porn is a male problem not a human problem, and says sex can get in the way of "other things we care about, like prosperity, safety, and happiness," which is a list of three things I don't care about all that much); and adds some gentleness of its own. You should read it! But I will give you a quick teaser of the AdB piece … [Read more...]

Hope Stumbles Eternal: “Frances Ha”

The director of The Squid and the Whale made a movie with the star of Damsels in Distress, and it's about friendship between women, forgiveness, and coming to terms with your life. Ordinarily this is the kind of sentence I end with, "...and then I woke up." But no! Frances Ha is real, it's in DC at E St Cinema and Bethesda Row, and it is a really good, small slice-of-life movie. I don't know that it's earthshaking but it is about two hours of Greta Gerwig being thoroughly luminous, with her big … [Read more...]

“The End of Premarital Sex”

The next installment in my marriage-and-family books series for Acculturated. … [Read more...]

“Sex in the Meritocracy”: Helen Rittelmeyer

w/a really good piece: I rather think Yale is plagued by an excess of moral purpose—that purpose being the pursuit of perfection, however perversely defined. Its students are not relativists; they are not even radicals. They are ordinary modern liberals, with all the earnestness and all the moral blind spots the term implies. Concepts like social responsibility and public service animate them greatly (not many Gordon Gekkos in this generation), honor and loyalty less so. Their code of sexual e … [Read more...]

“How to Write About Sex”

this was the part which struck me: These insights extended to matters of the heart. A couple of years ago, after dating a mutual acquaintance of ours had left me feeling bruised and baffled, I sought Sister’s advice. After hearing my story, she frowned slightly and asked, “Are you sure ________ is even capable of the kind of intimacy you want?” Just recently, the woman was diagnosed with a mild form of Asperger’s Syndrome, which, while not precluding intimacy absolutely, does tend to … [Read more...]


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